


Oh, bless me Father

by Maharia_Avile



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Age Difference, Anal Sex, Confident Cullen, Daddy Kink, Dark Cullen, Dom/sub, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Light BDSM, Light Dom/sub, Loss of Virginity, Older Man/Younger Woman, Rough Sex, Smut, Underage but not in Thedas!, Violent Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-16
Updated: 2020-07-05
Packaged: 2021-02-07 04:07:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 16
Words: 62,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21451768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maharia_Avile/pseuds/Maharia_Avile
Summary: Cullen agrees to marry Inquisitor Julian Trevelyan's stepmother after he pleads with him to do so. She has threatened to send Julian's young sister away to the Chantry unless she gets what she wants. But Cullen is not prepared for Julian's little sister to become his stepdaughter - not when she grows to consume his every thought, in any way but fatherly.Dark-ish Cullen, do not read unless you enjoy this sort of thing. It's going to get quite filthy.
Relationships: Cullen Rutherford/Female Trevelyan, Cullen Rutherford/Original Female Character(s), Cullen Rutherford/Trevelyan
Comments: 84
Kudos: 136





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi friends!
> 
> This is just a bit of fun, although the tone is quite serious. And this is A WORK OF FICTION. Don't like the tags, DON'T READ IT. Simple as that.

Julian Trevelyan was by many considered to be a hard man. Only twenty-six years old and already neck deep in a war to seal the very sky itself, he was a fearless Inquisitor; strong, relentless. He was more than capable of dealing quickly and harshly with his enemies, with violence that made lesser men shudder when his name was spoken. Julian could be violent, yes – even downright terrifying – but he was always fair, and it had earned him a great deal of respect.

Cullen Rutherford shared that respect for his Inquisitor and was proud to have been serving as his Commander for over a year. Julian trusted all four of his closest advisers and relied heavily on their counsel, but none as much as Cullen’s. Maybe not surprising since Julian moved the Inquisition ever forward by flashing the teeth of their forces to anyone who stood in their way – and Cullen commanded those forces and had proved himself time and time again to be more than capable. Julian had once said it was like the former templar had been born to do so, and that he was proud to regard Cullen as the brother he’d never had.

There were those who accused the Inquisitor of abusing his powers, of course. That he took what he wanted by excessive force, that he should be stopped at all costs. What they always failed to mention when they tried to rally opposition against the Inquisition was their own selfish reasons for wanting to do so.

Cullen despised them all and had no qualms over cutting them down like the treasonous dogs they were. His loyalty to Julian and to the Inquisition was absolute.

Which is why when Julian desperately begged him of the favor that was going to destroy Cullen’s personal life, he had no choice but to accept.

* * *

“Your _mother_?”

“My stepmother,” Julian said through gritted teeth. “Thankfully, that witch didn’t give birth to me or any of my sisters.”

Julian was standing looking out the window of Cullen’s office, his hands clasped tightly behind his back. He was tall, as tall as Cullen, and dressed in his usual noble attire. His chestnut hair was a perfect mess of short locks on the top of his head, framed by the shorter hair on the sides. Cullen was usually amused at how the other man managed to look like he rolled out of bed like that, like he hadn’t spent at least half an hour grooming himself before stepping out. ‘Representation’ was what Julian called it, but Cullen knew it was all to make the women in his path trip over themselves in his presence, which he, of course, managed to pull off. Julian was ridiculously handsome.

But Cullen was not at all amused after what Julian had just said.

“So let me get this straight, then. Your stepmother is a conniving, two faced bitch – your words – who only married your father for his money and his title. Now he’s dead, and you want _me _to marry her?”

“I don’t want you to. I need you to.”

“Maker’s breath, I can’t-”

“She’s all but keeping Nalide as a damn hostage, Cullen!” Julian barked and slammed his fist down onto the surface of the desk.

Cullen felt a rush of sympathy for his friend as he saw the pained look on his face.

“Nalide is very precious to me,” Julian continued, his voice quieter but with a new edge of desperation, one that Cullen had never heard in him before. “She is my youngest sister, I have always looked out for her. She was heartbroken when Father made me leave for the Conclave. With our other sisters already married off and living with their husbands, she knew that she would be left to the mercy of Lyria.”

“Lyria? Is that your stepmother?”

Julian nodded, his face growing darker as he continued. “Father used to dote on Nalide, he loved her very much. But his mind wasn’t what it used to be in those last years. He would never have married Lyria if he had any sort of sense left. She hated all of his children from the start. He was too old to give her any of her own. She made him send me away, his only male heir. Nalide was the only one left with them when he died not long after that.”

“Can’t you just send for Nalide, then?” Cullen asked.

Julian shook his head. “I would if I could, but Lyria is the matriarch in charge of the family and the estate now. I would have to go back home to claim my father’s title as Bann and run all that business there if I wanted that power back. I am, as you know, a _tiny _bit too tangled up in other things at the moment, with saving the world and all that.”

Cullen frowned. “Isn’t your sister old enough to leave of her own free will? I thought you said she was seventeen.”

“She is, just turned. And that would be of age if she was from Ferelden, but she is not. In Ostwick, all unmarried women under twenty years old are considered children, and their parents have all the say over them. Lyria is, in the eyes of the law, Nalide’s mother.”

“And what exactly is it she demands of you? In exchange for Nalide?”

Julian’s jaw tightened. “She is unfortunately not a stupid woman, she knows how much power I’ve gathered here. She knows very well that I – her _son_ -“ he spat out the word, “am the Inquisitor. And she knows she will have nothing if this war ends and I go back to Ostwick. She wants to secure her own power, and she is using my sister to do it. She’s threatened to send Nalide to the Chantry if I don’t give her something, and I can’t do that to Nalide. She is a free spirit. She makes everyone around her smile. Forcing her to become a lay sister would be like throwing her into a dungeon. I can’t snuff out her light like that, I just can’t.”

“What makes you think your mother would settle for me?” Cullen scratched the stubble on his cheek, which was more grown out than usual. “I’m not even of noble birth.”

“She has turned down every other suggestion for a match that I have made to her. You are the only one she will accept. She already has a title of her own and now she’s aiming higher. Since she can’t marry _me_, you are the next best choice. You are a war hero Cullen, the Commander of the Inquisition. And don’t pretend like you don’t know all this already,” he said and pointed his finger at Cullen. “You’ve already received hundreds of marriage propositions from every corner of Thedas.”

Cullen merely shrugged, his arms crossed over his chest while he was leaning back against the wall. “Ridiculous, all of it. Like I would ever want to marry any of them, a bunch of opportunists who’s never even met me.”

“I’m sorry for asking this of you, Cullen. But I need to protect my sister from her, and that’s final.”

Cullen sighed. “Fine, fine. I understand that you want to keep your sister safe. I don’t suppose I could marry _her _instead?” he said, a smile tugging at his lips to lighten the mood.

Julian scoffed. “Nalide is way too young for you, you old fuck.”

“Hey!” Cullen exclaimed in mock offense. “I’m only thirty-three, so excuse you.”

“Like I said, old_._ And anyway, any potential husband for Nalide would have to get Lyria’s approval, so even if I would have let you in my little sister’s pants-” Julian stuck his tongue out in disgust, “- I wouldn’t be able to make such an arrangement. That’s the whole point of this – that old bitch has all the power.”

Cullen frowned. “How old are we talking here?”

Julian laughed when he saw the worried arch of Cullen’s brow. “She’s actually not that old, just a few years older than me. About your age, give or take a year.”

“Okay, that would be a relief but I expect you are now going to tell me that she looks like a hag?”

Julian rolled his eyes. “It’s not her looks you have to worry about, my friend,” he said and put his hand on Cullen’s shoulder and started walking them out onto the battlements. “It’s her distasteful, venomous personality.”

* * *

There was quite a gathering in the courtyard. Everyone knew that the Inquisitor’s mother and youngest sister would come to visit Skyhold, but Julian had told no one about the engagement between his stepmother and Cullen yet.

Julian and Cullen were lined up at the front of the small crowd as a dozen horses with armored riders came trotting in through the gate, followed by a carriage wearing the Trevelyan family crest on its sides.

Cullen’s nerves were pricklier than usual, but he knew that no one could tell by looking at him. The mood was tense. Too tense. He jabbed Julian discreetly in the side with his elbow to get his attention. “If only all these people knew that I’m soon going to be your new dad,” he whispered.

“Shut up, Rutherford. And never call yourself that again,” Julian scolded him, but a small smile played on his lips and Cullen was pleased that his joke had made the air feel a bit lighter.

One of the carriage’s drivers had jumped down and opened the door. Cullen steeled himself for the first look he was about to have of his future wife, but instead, a girl appeared in the opening and swatted away the servant’s outstretched hand. She all but jumped down to the ground before smoothing out her skirts and tucking her golden hair behind her ear. “_She _might have to call you Father though,” Julian snickered. The girl’s – or rather the young woman’s – yellow dress looked like sunshine and her shoulders were scandalously bare. She looked very sweet, anyone could see that, but Cullen was still unprepared for the way her whole face lit up and when her eyes found her brother. She looked so incredibly… alive.

“Julian!” she squealed and kicked off her shoes and ran up to Julian who was waiting for her with open arms and a grin across his face. She threw her arms around his neck, but Cullen’s attention was drawn away from the endearing reunion taking place right next to him when another woman was helped out of the carriage. Her face was hidden behind a mask of gold and she was wearing a gaudy silver and black dress that flowed out behind her.

She didn’t move an inch away from the carriage and Julian cleared his throat and started walking towards her, his sister holding his hand. Cullen followed them.

“Mother,” Julian greeted the woman in front of them stiffly, making no attempt to hug her.

“Julian. Such a pleasure to see you again.” Her voice was sweet, normal. Cullen didn’t know why this surprised him, or what he’d been expecting. Then her gaze turned to him, and he supposed he had no choice but to play the perfect gentleman.

“My Lady.” He took her hand in his and raised it to his lips, kissing it softly, before letting her go. “It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.”

Her green eyes never left his face as she flicked back long strands of jet black hair from her shoulder. “The pleasure is mine, ser.” The golden mask hid most of her face but it stopped right above her mouth, and she smiled at him as she spoke. He couldn’t really tell if it reached her eyes. She turned her head towards Julian’s sister and motioned for her to step forward.

“This is my daughter Nalide. Come on girl, don’t just stand there and gawk, say hello.”

Cullen could see how the girl’s mouth tightened as she looked at her stepmother and he sympathized with her. He wouldn’t appreciate being spoken to like that either.

Nalide’s eyes turned to Cullen and the sour expression on her face disappeared, replaced by curious eyes and a smile that Cullen bemusedly thought would make most other men fumble for words, although he doubted that she was aware that. She stepped closer to him. “It’s an honor to meet you, Ser Rutherford. My brother has given you so much praise in his letters to me, I am very thankful for all the help you have given him.”

“Has he now?” Cullen said and looked smugly at Julian, who rolled his eyes at him again. “And please, my Lady, call me Cullen.”

“Alright, Cullen it is then. Unless you-” she looked at her stepmother, “-would prefer it if I started calling him Father right away?” she chirped, looking like the picture of innocence.

“Nalide, behave yourself or so help me, I don’t want poor Cullen to think he’s going to be stuck with a petulant child for the rest of his days,” she bit back, and the cheerful expression on Nalide’s face disappeared again.

Cullen didn’t like it one bit. He felt cold as he looked into the older woman’s face, he felt like she had robbed him and everyone else of the warmth that had radiated from the girl only moments before.

Julian stepped in and diffused the situation before the tension threatened to burst. “Mother, you must be tired after the long journey here. Let me escort you to your quarters.”

The woman simply nodded. “Nalide, are you coming?”

“I’m not tired, Mother. I would like to explore this place, it looks so wonderful! I’m sure Cullen could keep me company and show me around?”

“I’m sure he has better things to do than to run around with children,” Lyria said, but Nalide was unfazed, still looking at Cullen expectantly.

“It’s no trouble at all,” he said without looking at Lyria, smiling at Nalide instead. “You’ll be my stepdaughter soon enough anyway. We might as well get to know each other.”

Cullen could hear Julian scoff at him calling his sister that, but Cullen paid him no mind, he just kept smiling conspiratorially at Nalide, who seemed barely able to keep her excitement concealed.

“Fine,” Lyria said and sighed. “You have one hour, and then you stop bothering him, you hear me? You look worn out, and your feet are filthy, Maker, put your shoes back on girl, or you’ll reflect poorly on me.”

Without another word, she let Julian take her arm and they started to walk towards the keep. Everyone watching were beginning to disperse as well.

“For the record, you don’t look the least bit worn out,” Cullen said and offered Nalide his arm, which she took with a smile beaming on her face.

“Oh, that’s kind of you to say. Now, what’s the most exciting thing to see around here?”

She didn’t wait for an answer and started dragging Cullen with her to the nearest stairway going up to the battlements. “I bet the view is amazing from up there, isn’t it?” she said and looked back at him with excitement in her eyes while they ascended. He was barely keeping up with her and he laughed at her enthusiasm.

Nalide was a kind, sweet girl and Cullen really appreciated her presence over the next few days. He didn’t see much of Lyria, she was mostly cooped up with Julian during the days – probably discussing the terms of the marriage and other practicalities. Cullen had asked Julian to be kept out of it – he didn’t even care what their plans entailed. He would do whatever Julian asked of him anyway, and Cullen was still Commander and had better things to do than to plan out his personal life.

He did see Nalide around a great deal, though. She seemed to be bringing new life to the keep, charming everyone she met, always wearing a bright colored dress more fit for summer than the early spring they were in, but she didn’t seem to mind. It was a stark contrast to her mother’s dark, Orlesian dresses, and Cullen wondered if it was Nalide’s own quiet little rebellion to wear such cheerful things. Lyria always seemed to look at Nalide with disapproval, although she rarely actually spoke to her daughter.

Cullen felt sorry for the girl, and was more determined to support Julian in his need to protect her.

Nalide came by his office at least once a day, bringing food or wine to him as refreshments. He didn’t quite know what her purpose was other than to chat with him for a bit if he had time for it, but he found that he welcomed the distraction. That girl always seemed to be able to put a smile on his face. He wasn’t the only one who appreciated her as she was drawing attention to herself without probably even realizing it. It wasn’t that she was beautiful – she was, but she was still young and maybe more sweet than beautiful – it was the mood around her. She had a way of disarming even the most stern of people. Laughter and good spirits followed wherever she went, and that wasn’t easy to come by in a time of war.

It had only been days since she arrived but Cullen had already had to smack half a dozen of the sentries in the back of the head for slacking off and gawking at her instead of moving along and doing their jobs.

He had enough of it when one of his own captains stared after her as she left his office, his eyes blatantly staring too low.

“Get a hold of yourself, Captain,” he growled. “Where are your manners? You’re old enough to be her father,” he scolded the other man but he didn’t look the least bit ashamed.

“If only,” he snickered, but stopped himself when he saw the murderous expression on Cullen’s face. “I-I’m sorry, Commander. It won’t happen again.”

“You better fucking see to it that it doesn’t,” Cullen snarled. “Now get out of here and do your damned job or I’ll send you to the wastes.”

“Please don’t, Commander, I’m very sorry. I should have known better, I-”

“Enough.” Cullen rolled his eyes at the man’s groveling. “Get out of my sight.”

The man scurried out of there as fast as his legs could take him. Everyone knew that Cullen was just as harsh as the Inquisitor, and riling him up was a very, very stupid thing to do.

Cullen felt like smashing something but he didn’t know why. Probably the sheer frustration about having no say about his personal life. He sank down into his chair and stroked the stubble on his cheek. Only one more day until the wedding. It was all moving so fast, but it was for the best. He wanted Nalide safe-

He wanted to help Julian protect his baby sister.

* * *

They were sat in the middle of the table, Julian on his side and Nalide on Lyria’s. Despite the music and the drinks flowing, Cullen found himself on edge. He had just married a woman he barely knew and – by the Maker, did the throng of suitors lining up to ask Nalide for a dance never end? She had seemed to find it nice to be asked the first few times but now she looked uncomfortable, yet she still accepted politely. Every new man approaching her made him more irritated. Couldn’t they just leave her in peace for one second? He watched her put on a smile each time she stood up and took someone’s hand, ever sweet even though none of them deserved it, and then he watched as they danced.

He decided he was going to try to eat something, maybe the lack of food was what made him feel slightly nauseated. He plucked a tomato from the plate in front of him but before he had time to put it in his mouth, Nalide and her current dance partner swept by. The man was holding her too tightly, and the tomato burst in Cullen’s hand as he squeezed it too hard. He growled in frustration and stood up so fast that he knocked his chair backwards. Lyria let out a small gasp of surprise beside him, but he didn’t feel like explaining anything to her, so he left without a word to go clean his hand.

After he’d dunked it in water, he didn’t feel like returning to the festivities, didn’t feel like watching her-

Watching anyone. Instead, he went out onto one of the balconies and placed his arms crossed against the railing. He took some deep breaths to calm his nerves and stared out into the darkness.

He didn’t hear her approach him and jumped when she placed a hand on his shoulder. She jerked it back at his reaction.

“I’m sorry, Cullen, I didn’t mean to disturb you-”

“No, I’m sorry, I… I thought you were someone else.”

Nalide smiled at that. “You thought I was my dear old mother, did you?” She jumped up on the railing and sat with her back to the abyss below her.

“Maker’s breath, girl, be careful,” Cullen huffed and stepped forward to take a hold around her waist to keep her from falling. “Don’t be so reckless.”

“Scolding me like you’re my dad already, huh?” she teased, and Cullen was going to say something snarky in return but cut himself short when he became acutely aware of how close they were, and what it would look like if someone found them out there. He was standing between her legs, pressed against her, his hands firmly around the curves of her waist. It would look bad – really, really bad.

“Come on, let’s get you down from there sweetheart,” he mumbled and lifted her up. He almost lost his footing as he put her down and made them both stumble back against the stone, her back pressed to it and him pressed against her_. _She let out a small sound of surprise before he steadied her again, one arm snaked around her waist and his hand grabbing hers to keep her still. He knew what it would look like if someone saw them, but he couldn’t bring himself to move. She stared up at him; her fast breathing coming out in little clouds, and Cullen realized it was a chilly evening, although he hadn’t felt it. He was feeling almost feverish instead, but then it dawned on him that Nalide was only wearing a dress. Her shoulders were bare as usual, and he cursed himself for his poor manners.

“Are you cold, love?” he asked, his voice low as if he were saying something he shouldn’t even though it was a perfectly polite question.

Nalide looked up at him with her wide eyes, her hand still in his. She didn’t make even the slightest attempt to move. When she finally seemed to register that he had asked her a question, her answer came out as a whisper. “Y-yes.”

Cullen let go of her and she looked stricken at the loss of contact. Probably because of the loss of his warmth, Cullen told himself, and eased his jacket off himself immediately. He put it around her shoulders and rubbed her arms a little awkwardly on top of the fabric. Her eyes were downcast and when he was satisfied that she was warm enough, he dropped his hands from her again and just stood there. After a few moments, he realized that he hovered over her; still practically trapping her against the wall, and was just about to back away and say something when she spoke instead.

“Aren’t you cold now?” she asked and finally looked at him again, a warm smile spreading across her face. It disarmed him completely. He felt a sudden desperation to make her keep that smile. It made her look radiant.

“I’ve survived worse than a moderately chilly night in Skyhold,” he chuckled and began rolling up the sleeves of his white shirt to prove that it didn’t bother him. Her eyes followed his every move, and lingered on his bare arms for a few moments. Cullen’s throat was dry, suddenly parched – he needed a drink.

“I, uh, guess we should go back inside,” he said, but before he had time to move, Nalide’s fingers slipped over his arm as she took a hold of him.

“Can we please stay here for just a little longer? I… I don’t want to go back in there.”

“I don’t know if we should,” he said and swallowed hard, very aware of how she was absentmindedly rubbing her thumb over his skin. “It might seem inappropriate if someone sees us out here together like this.”

“Why?” she breathed. “You are my stepfather now, you have a right to speak to your daughter whenever you want.”

Cullen groaned inwardly. “Alright, we’ll stay a little longer. Why don’t you want to go back inside? You seemed to have… a nice time, before.”

“Too much dancing,” she said and stared at the double doors leading back into the keep.

Cullen’s fist clenched at his side. “Did anyone bother you? You just tell me who and I’ll-”

“No, no, nothing like that.” She looked back at him and smiled. “Thank you for asking, though. It feels nice to have someone looking out for me.”

She looked so earnest and sweet that he didn’t know what to say so he just smiled back at her. He lost track of how long they stood like that before she finally broke the silence.

“I shouldn’t keep you from Mother. It’s getting late and it’s your wedding night after all.”

Cullen made a face at that without thinking it might be rude, but Nalide only laughed when she saw it. The melodious sound of it added to the fever he was sure he was coming down with.

“I should go back inside,” Nalide said.

Cullen nodded. “You do that. And Nalide?”

“Yes?”

“You tell me if anyone bothers you, alright? Boy, man, I don’t care. If anyone makes you even slightly uncomfortable. You are my family now, and no one fucks with you, or they’ll have to answer to me.”

She stared at him for a few seconds before a small smile played at her lips. “Yes, Cullen, I promise. If anyone gives me trouble, I’ll send them straight to daddy dearest.”

She slipped away and Cullen cursed under his breath.


	2. Chapter 2

Cullen had barely set foot inside as he exited the balcony a while after Nalide had done the same, before Julian appeared and grabbed his arm.

“Maker’s breath Cullen, where have you been?”

Cullen shrugged him off.

“I was just taking in some fresh air, wanted to clear my head. Why, did someone die?”

Julian narrowed his eyes at him. “No need to be so snarky. Lyria has been wondering where you went.”

“Really?” Cullen said as they started walking back to the party. “She’s barely said more than two words to me all night. I wonder what is so riveting about my company that she has requested it now.”

“I doubt she’s very interested in your company, but abandoning your bride at your wedding night will cause people to talk. And she is all about keeping up appearances.”

“And here you are, running errands for her.”

“I’m _not_. I was looking for Nalide, I haven’t seen her for a while either.”

Cullen’s gut wrenched at the mere mention of Julian’s little sister but he steeled herself and said calmly: “She was with me.”

Julian stopped walking. “What?”

“We just had a little chat out on the balcony. She’s fine, she went back inside just a few minutes ago.”

Julian looked at him hard but relaxed after a few moments. “Well, that’s good. At least I know she’s safe in your company,” he said and started walking again, Cullen alongside him.

“Are you concerned for her safety?” he asked Julian.

“Not really, I suppose. But I will always worry about her. She’s older than when I last saw her, really growing into a beautiful young woman, and I’m leaving tomorrow on a mission. I doubt anyone would try anything with her while I’m here, but once her big, scary Inquisitor brother leaves, who knows? Nalide has lived a sheltered life. I’m not sure she is equipped to deal with… unwanted suitors.”

They had arrived just outside the doors leading in to the celebration when Julian stopped and looked at Cullen with a serious expression on his face.

“You swear to me that you will keep her safe, Cullen. You _are _her stepfather now and you have to assert yourself as such so that anyone even thinking about touching or hurting her knows that it means crossing you. No one in their right mind will want to fuck with the Commander’s daughter, even if she’s only your daughter by marriage.”

Cullen nodded. “I’ll make sure everyone knows. No one is going to lay a finger on her.” It was true that he would keep her safe. Julian didn’t need to know the lengths Cullen would go to to make sure of it, or his selfish reasons why.

“Then there is the issue of Lyria. She’s playing nice for now and has agreed to stay here with Nalide – and _you_. She knows that you can’t leave to go play house in Ostwick, but she could leave at any time and take Nalide with her, or worse – send her to the Chantry. You might be married now but you haven’t gained anything from the Trevelyan side. She is still head of the family until I return or you give her children, then they will inherit if I don’t go back.”

Cullen felt sick at the businesslike discussion about his future children. He had absolutely no desire to give the cold woman he had married anything at all. He would try to make sure to avoid it for as long as possible.

“So what do you want me to do? How can I stop her from leaving?” Cullen asked reluctantly.

“She won’t leave immediately no matter what. She is expected to stay with her new husband, and Nalide is supposed to get to know her new father,” Julian said and grimaced at the last part. “But she does want children so she can secure the estate back home. So I suggest you fuck her at least a few times a week to keep her docile.”

“Straight to the point, are we?” Cullen remarked with a raised eyebrow.

Julian merely shrugged. “No point beating around the bush. You do what you have to do to make her stop taking Nalide away from here.”

“I won’t let her do that, I swear to you,” he said, jaw tight from thinking about Nalide leaving.

Julian clasped Cullen’s shoulder. “You are a good man, Cullen, and I owe you indefinitely for this.” He sighed and pointed into the room. “Let’s get you back to your wife now, yes?”

* * *

Lyria looked relieved as Cullen sat down next to her.

“I’m sorry to disappear on you, I just needed to take care of something,” he said and then raised his glass to her.

She picked up her own and nodded. “It’s fine, Cullen. I know you are a very busy man.”

Cullen was just about to at least try to start a conversation with her when he swept his eyes across the room, telling himself that it wasn’t to find Nalide, when he spotted her. She was dancing again. The music was slow and a very handsome man a few years older than her was holding her tightly against him. Cullen was almost about to crush his glass in his hand when he saw that Nalide wasn’t exactly looking up adoringly into her partner’s face, instead her eyes were searching across the room just as his had been. When she found him, her face lit up and she very clearly tried to keep herself from smiling.

Cullen couldn’t take it, not another second or he would walk up to her, shove the other man away and drag her out with him.

Instead, he turned to Lyria and offered her his hand. “I think we’ve put in enough time here, have we not? Let us retire to your quarters.”

Lyria smiled at him and took his hand. “I would love to, dear husband.”

Ten minutes later they were in Lyria’s lavish guest room. Cullen watched her from where he was leaning against the wall next to the fire while she was pouring them each a glass of wine. She was beautiful, anyone could see that. Her long, black hair reached her waist and her pale, creamy skin was perfect as far as he could see. She had an extravagant purple wedding dress on and just a touch of kohl around her green eyes, eyes that Cullen supposed could have been beautiful if they hadn’t looked so cold all the time.

All in all, she was a very attractive woman. And Cullen couldn’t care less. She had no carefree smile on her lips, no golden hair cascading down her shoulders, no light in her eyes. Lyria was walking up to him with the wine, and it made him irritated that it wasn’t her daughter instead, that it wasn’t her – their – daughter he was about to fuck.

If he wanted to see Nalide again, he had to keep Lyria satiated. But she would have no say in how he went about it.

He took both of the glasses out of Lyria’s hands and put them down on the table with a bang, the contents sloshing over the rims. Lyria flinched but didn’t say anything.

“Take your dress off,” he commanded, and his tone left no question about who was in charge. Lyria didn’t seem to mind and started unlacing the dress from the back expertly. It took her a few minutes to wriggle out of the elaborate garment, but when she’d finished, she stood naked in front of him.

He looked her up and down without much interest and pulled her to him. He kissed her once and grabbed a fistful of her hair. “Get on your knees,” he growled. He didn’t want to look at her.

She sank down in front of him and deftly untied the strings to his trousers. The moment he felt her hand around his cock he closed his eyes, pretending that she was someone else. When he felt her wet tongue on his tip, he imagined Nalide’s soft, full lips and her little tongue sticking out between them to taste him. The thought made him harder than he was sure he had ever been before, and he grabbed her hair, imagining Nalide’s golden curls between his fingers while he drove himself into her mouth.

He was relentless, making the woman on her knees in front of him gag and gulp for air several times but he didn’t care. Finally, he pulled out of her mouth and turned her around and pressed her down into the floor so that he wouldn’t have to look at her face. He placed his cock against her cunt and he didn’t know why but it pissed him off that she was wet for him, like she had enjoyed how he treated her when he was really thinking about her daughter. He pushed himself into her with a grunt and he fucked her hard against the floor, disgusted by her moans. He got through it by closing his eyes and imagining Nalide underneath him, writhing and moaning for her daddy to fuck her harder, how her tight little virgin cunt would clench around his cock, how he would whisper encouragement to his beautiful little girl while he made her feel so, so good.

He almost lost track of himself and pulled out just in time and came all over Lyria’s naked back. He let go of her and leaned back against the sofa behind him to catch his breath. His wife got up and went over to the basin and started to clean herself up, like nothing had just happened. She looked perfectly content and it made Cullen hate her even more.

* * *

Cullen hadn’t seen Nalide or his wife for two days. He was extremely busy with work as they had several large operations going and Julian was away on one of them. Cullen thought it was just as well that he hadn’t seen his new ‘family’ since he had no idea how he was supposed to restrain himself in Nalide’s company. He had barely slept since he’d fucked Lyria on their wedding night, the memory of it and how he had imagined Nalide was almost as vivid as if it had actually happened and he kept dreaming of her over and over, no matter if he was asleep or awake. He had slept in his own bedroom for the past nights and as soon as he retired for the night he stroked his cock furiously while imagining his little girl on her knees before him. _His. _She was his already, he would keep his promise to Julian, he would put the fear of death into anyone who so much looked at her the wrong way.

He tried for the hundredth time that day to shake his head and clear out the image of her from his mind when the door to his office burst open. He looked up from where he was standing over his desk, several captains and soldiers around him looking up as well at the flushed young man standing in the door catching his breath.

“What?” he demanded.

“Commander, it’s your, ah… your daughter. She’s requesting your presence.”

Cullen raised his eyebrows. “I’m quite busy at the moment, she-”

“She’s down in the stables, Commander. I think you should go see her, she’s very upset.”

Cullen dropped the parchment he was holding and walked up to the messenger boy. “What do you mean she’s upset?” he said, his tone sharp. The boy started looking nervous.

“I- I found her sitting there crying, and I asked if I could help her or get anyone and she said she only wanted you.”

“So you found a girl crying on the stable floor and you just _left _her there?” Cullen felt like smacking the boy but he restrained himself. “Never mind. I’ll go down there right away.”

He made his way down to the stables, worry forming in his gut. What was she crying about? If anyone had-

His train of thought stopped as he entered the stables and saw her sitting off to the side near the corner, her yellow dress gathered around her on the dirty floor and her face hidden in her hands. She was sobbing.

He knelt before her. “Nalide?” he said softly and she raised her head from her hands.

“Cullen!” She threw herself over him, burying her face against his shoulder, knocking him on his ass. He didn’t try to get up but pulled her into his lap instead.

“There, there, love, tell me what happened,” he said soothingly, stroking his hand over her hair. She sobbed a few more times before pulling herself together.

“Look at what he did to Rollo,” she whispered and pointed behind her. Cullen’s eyes widened when he caught sight of the dead dog lying in a bloody mess on the ground. He didn’t have time to ask before she spilled the whole story. “I was coming down here to visit him, he’s my dog, Julian got him for me for my tenth birthday, he’s been my best friend for years but Mother won’t allow him to stay inside with us. I found him here like this, someone… someone cut his throat! Oh, it’s so awful Cullen,” she said and once again buried her face against him.

“Do you know who did it?” he said, feeling disturbingly calm, like he always did right before he was about to partake in violence.

“The stable boy said that it was the smith’s apprentice. I went and asked him and he claimed that Rollo had bitten him, but he would never! He was the kindest creature you'd ever known. When I told him that, he just laughed at me and told me to clean up the blood since the dog was my property.”

Cullen stroked her back until she calmed down a bit, kissing the top of her head as he did so. “Stay here, sweetheart,” he said. “I’m going to go talk to him.”

“Wh-what are you going to say to him?” Nalide asked and wiped her tears, looking up at Cullen with wide eyes.

“Don’t you worry about that. I’ll take care of it.”

He walked over to the blacksmith, who was fast at work in the forge. He looked up as Cullen entered and nodded at him, and Cullen did the same.

“Where is your apprentice?”

“Which one?” the blacksmith huffed.

“The one who just killed my daughter’s dog,” Cullen said and flashed his teeth.

“That damned boy,” the smith said and shook his head. “Always trouble. You’ll find him out back.”

Cullen didn’t say anything else, he simply walked outside where a soot-covered boy in his late teens sat laughing and playing cards with two equally stupid looking friends. The boy in question had his back to Cullen but the other two saw the Commander and shot to their feet, clearly worried about the expression on his face.

“Which one of you is the blacksmith’s apprentice?” he snarled and the last boy whirled around and stood up as well.

His friends sold him out before he had time to open his mouth. “Him!” they both said in unison and pointed to the soot-covered one. He looked as if he were about to piss his pants.

Good, Cullen thought. He would soon enough. He walked up to him and grabbed a hold of his shirt and started to drag him into the center of the courtyard. The boy yelled protests and tried to plant his feet into the ground but Cullen was far too strong for him. The commotion caused quite a bit of interest and by the time Cullen threw the boy down onto the grass, at least twenty people had gathered to watch what was happening. Nalide had come out from the stables as well and was standing to the side, watching with wide eyes.

“Is it true? Did you kill my daughter’s dog?” Cullen asked and stared coldly at the boy who was trying to sit up.

“No, I didn’t do nothing, I swear!”

“He’s a filthy liar!” Nalide yelled and stepped a bit closer to Cullen. “He admitted it to me while he still had blood on his hands!”

“No, _you’re _lying, you stupid bitch!” the boy yelled back. “Probably just pissy because I didn’t want to kiss you behind the stables like you asked me to.”

Nalide looked outraged. “I did no such thing, you disgusting piece of filth! Like I would ever touch you when-” She looked at Cullen. “I swear I didn’t do anything like that,” she said, her voice desperate as if she couldn’t think of anything worse than him believing the boy’s lie. But Cullen didn’t have time to give a response before the stable boy walked up to his side.

“She’s telling the truth, ser. I saw him kill the dog and brag about it to his friends. Your daughter is always very sweet, she would never have acted like that.” He looked a little scared as he talked but stood with his back straight. Cullen appreciated his coming forward so that the rest of the crowd heard his testimony.

The boy on the ground shouted in protest and tried to get up again but Cullen planted his boot firmly against his chest and it was all he could do not to squeeze all of the air out of his lungs right then and there. He ground his teeth together and yanked him up by grabbing his collar, holding his face in front of his own, the boy’s feet almost off the ground.

“I should cut your throat like you did her dog, you worthless little shit,” Cullen snarled so low that only the boy and Nalide could hear, Nalide who was standing right next to him.

“Cullen, wait,” she said and grabbed his arm.

“Sweetest, I need to-” Cullen began, his voice strangled as he tried to restrain himself from the violence that threatened to spill over at any second.

“I know, I know. I just want to tell him one thing before you do anything,” she whispered; her lips so close to him sent shivers down his spine. Nalide turned to the boy, who was still being held at the throat by Cullen. She locked her eyes on him with hatred Cullen had no idea that she possessed and her voice came out as a sweet whisper and he watched the boy’s eyes widen at her words. “I’m going to let my father rip you to shreds.”

She then turned back to Cullen and pressed herself into his side, letting everyone else think she was a frightened girl who was clinging to her protector. “Take him to the dungeon so you can do it without anyone else seeing, and promise me you’ll let me watch.”

Cullen could hardly believe what he was hearing. His blood burned and her sweet, little voice delivering those vicious words-

He felt Nalide’s hand press against his stomach. To anyone else it looked like a simple hug but he could feel how her fingers dug into his skin. Desperate to get away from there, to get her alone, he turned to address the crowd.

“This lowlife,” he started and inclined his head to the boy who he was holding by the neck by then, “has killed an innocent animal for his own satisfaction, in a most sadistic way.”

He noted that the onlookers were shaking their heads and murmuring their disgust.

“He’s going straight to the dungeon to await the Inquisitor’s judgment when he gets back, and if I hear so much as a whisper about anyone else trying to tarnish my innocent girl’s reputation, so help me, that someone should count himself lucky if throwing him in the dungeon is all I do with him.”

Asserting himself as an angry father, just as Julian had asked him. It wasn’t that difficult since he meant every word.

He dragged the now sobbing boy after him towards the lower keep, ignoring his pleas for mercy. He didn’t look back to see if Nalide followed, he could only focus on putting one foot in front of the other, not knowing what called his blood to sing more: the impending violence, the fact that Nalide had said she wanted to watch or what being alone with her down there would mean.

Minutes later, he had brought the boy to an empty part of the dungeon and ordered the guard out. He threw the pathetic, sniveling apprentice to the cold stone floor and turned his head to see Nalide slip in through the door and close it behind her.

She walked up to them calmly, ignoring the boy’s half-sobbing apologies.

“You killed my dog,” she stated calmly and then looked at Cullen while still addressing the boy. “My father is going to teach you a lesson.”

Cullen found it hard to breathe when her eyes filled with adoration for him. She was actually standing there, looking at him as hopefully as if she were a normal teenager who had asked her dad to buy her a new dress.

His heart was hammering inside his chest and he could feel how hard he was for her. He tore his eyes away from her reluctantly and didn’t wait another second before he descended on the boy. He would make him pay for making his little girl cry.

He didn’t know how much time had passed when he finally stopped hitting the boy, who was little more than a bloody mess, but still alive. Cullen wiped some blood away from his face to stop it from dripping down into his eyes. He stood up, a little shaky from the adrenaline still shooting out in his system, and Nalide was on him in an instant, throwing her arms around him.

She hugged him tightly before leaning back and looking up at his face. She put her hand up to him and let one of her fingers slowly wipe a bit of blood off his lip; his own from biting into it too hard, and she was watching it with fascination. Cullen stared at her, breathing deep and ragged. He wanted to do so many filthy things to her, he-

“Thank you, daddy,” she whispered and pressed herself harder against him.

He took her hand in his and kissed the blood off her finger. His eyes hazed over with lust when she let out a small moan and with a growl he pushed her against the wall, letting her feel exactly what she did to him. He stared at her parted lips and was just about to abandon all sense when the door to the dungeon swung open. They flew apart and stared at the person who had just entered.

“Cullen,” Leliana said. “We need to talk.”


	3. Chapter 3

His blood tasted good on her tongue – like all the wars she imagined he had been through, like all the comfort his strength gifted her. The single smear of blood that had been left on her hand was gone now, dissolved sweetly on her tongue; she felt herself longing for more – more of _him_.

Nalide was sitting in the garden of the keep, the still cold breeze of early spring dancing across her skin, the dampness of the earth and grass beneath her sipping through the layers of her dress, but she didn’t notice. She had her gaze pinned to the sky above her, lost in thought.

The red-haired woman had shooed her out of the dungeon and closed the door in her face. Nalide had stood there staring at the rusty iron and wooded door for a few moments, unsure of what to do, before thinking it best to leave the woman and Cullen alone. The red-head had had a stern expression on her face. Nalide had wandered aimlessly until she arrived in the near-empty garden, where she had unceremoniously plopped herself down on the ground.

She had been only a breath away from feeling his lips against her, she was sure of it—there had been no misinterpreting his hungry stare. Her own stepfather.

Calling him that was no more than a ridiculous formality, as preposterous as calling Lyria ‘Mother’. That cold, calculating woman was the furthest thing from a mother Nalide could imagine. And someone marrying your stepmother and thus becoming your new father seemed just as insane to her, but in the eyes of the law it was what it was. Nalide had only called Cullen that to tease him at first, but how it made him respond did not escape her attention. She didn’t understand it at first but then Julian had come to speak with her, nudging her into doing it even more, saying it was for her own good. That it would help to _protect _her if people saw the Commander as her father. Julian assured her that Cullen was a trusted friend, and that she should regard him as such as well.

After fending for herself for years, the thought of having someone to keep her safe, someone who appreciated her instead of looking at her like she was the dirt underneath their heels, was more than a little tempting. Nalide _saw _people; she always had. Her brother had once told her that he didn’t know if he should think of her as a child or an old soul – her knowing eyes had unsettled even him on occasion, and her stepmother had hissed ‘witch’ to her more times than she could count. Nalide had seen how Cullen had reacted when she called him father – it sparked a need in him, that was plain to see. She doubted that _he_ could discern if it was just his protective side or simply pure lust – _she_ knew it was both.

She let her fingers glide through her hair absentmindedly while she remembered him out on the balcony at the night of the wedding; how he had grabbed her when she purposely placed herself swaying at the top of the railing, how he had stared at her for just a little too long. He had looked tense when she danced with her suitors, and when he had caught word about what had happened to her dog – she searched for her breath as the painful memory of seeing the animal in a pool of his own blood stabbed at her – Cullen had done exactly what she had asked of him. The surprise in his eyes as she whispered in his ear how she wanted him to punish the boy was replaced by a ravenous glow after the deed was done.

Nalide pressed her nails into the palms of her hands as she imagined his eyes baring her soul to him like that again – it had made her feel naked in front of him. Oh, how she _wanted wanted wanted _to be. Wondering what had gone through his mind as he licked his own blood off her skin made a feverish warmth unlike anything she had known before pool between her legs and she squeezed them together and bit her tongue to stop a whimper from leaving her lips.

Stepfather or no, she would have no choice but to give herself to him. That she had waited all her youth, saving herself for her future husband, seemed like a virtue she had treasured a lifetime ago; one which held no sway over her any longer.

She let herself fall on her back to the grass, the gray clouds broken by weak rays of sunlight here and there, swimming in her vision. She stared at the slow sway across the sky for a long time. She did not worry about what the red-head was saying to Cullen. Nalide had seen him, had _felt _him; she was beyond certain that he would take her sooner or later and she was in no hurry. She still had the taste of his blood on her tongue, and the longer he waited the sweeter it would be when he finally gave in. She craved it with every last bit of her soul.

* * *

Cullen was still fighting to catch his breath after his near-tryst with Nalide. He watched in silence as Leliana shut the door with Nalide on the other side, not trusting himself to speak yet; afraid that his voice would be as unsteady as he felt.

Leliana turned back to the room, glancing over him quickly before her eyes landed on the beaten boy laying on the floor. She said nothing and Cullen’s unease grew as minutes passed.

She finally looked at him. “Julian would kill you if he knew.”

“What?” Cullen pointed to the boy. “That I punished the one who killed his sister’s dog and then all but called her a whore?”

“Do not play the fool with me, Cullen,” she said, voice hard as stone. “I know you aren’t one so let us get right to it, shall we?” Her sharp Orlesian cut through him like a knife; scolding him, mocking him.

“I’m not doing anything of the sort,” he bit back. “I only did exactly what I just said I did.”

“Whether you beat the boy rightly or not isn’t the question here and you know it. I couldn’t care less about him.” She narrowed her eyes at him. “Have you done something irrevocable yet?”

“I-” he started but she quickly interrupted him.

“_Have_ you touched her yet?”

He couldn’t lie under her unflinching scrutiny. “No,” he stated, jaw set.

Leliana nodded and stepped closer. “That’s good, then there is still time to end this madness, to...” She trailed off as she watched his face. He tried to steel himself expressionless but had clearly failed.

“Cullen.” Leliana reached out and put her hand on his shoulder. “What you have done for Julian is very selfless, you… Maker’s breath, you are in love with her, is that what you think? Not your wife, but the girl.”

Cullen stared at the wall.

“Cullen. You cannot.”

“I can’t what?” he hissed, suddenly more irritated than ashamed. How in the Maker’s name did she know? How could it be so obvious?

Leliana threw her arms out in exasperation. “You cannot mean to get involved with the daughter of the woman you just married!”

“I had no fucking say in any of this,” Cullen snarled. “Do you think I _want _to be married to Julian’s stepmother? Do you think I can help myself? Nalide is the only good thing to have come from any of this, she– I _can’t _stop myself. And do not give me any lectures on how I’m her stepfather, I know that already, or how she is too young for me. It doesn’t change a thing.”

“I do not think she is too young, Cullen. She is of age here in Ferelden and you would have been an exemplary match for her under other circumstances. But _these _circumstances exist now, and you have agreed to them.”

Cullen turned around and stared into the darkness. “I would never have agreed if I had met Nalide first.” His voice was low but he was sure Leliana had heard him.

Leliana sighed but said nothing for a few moments. She then walked up and stood next to Cullen, regarding the boy on the floor. “Is he alive?” she asked, indifferent.

“Yes.”

“Good. I’ll take care of this. And if you are truly serious about this… Please, think of what I have said, _try _not to do anything while I consider this.”

Cullen turned his head and looked at her with one eyebrow raised. “While you consider what?”

“Don’t you worry about that. Run along now, and try not to bump _into _your daughter, please.”

Cullen shook his head angrily at her remark, but he had no interest in staying there, so he did as she told him and walked out of the dungeon up into the sunshine.

* * *

For days, he was good. He was busy and didn’t see much of Nalide. When he did catch a glimpse of her, she only smiled and went on her way. It puzzled him but he tried to put it out of his mind, like Leliana had told him.

Lyria had started to bring him lunch instead of Nalide, exchanging polite small talk with him. That was the only type of conversation they ever had outside of the bedchamber. Cullen knew they couldn’t keep that up forever but it was enough for now. He did his marital duty to her whenever he wasn’t too exhausted and it seemed to suffice for his wife, for the time being anyway. He had a hard time not taking out all of his anger on her; always restraining himself from being dangerously rough with her in bed, but it wasn’t easy. Not when the one he really desired was somewhere near at all times. Not seeing her helped a little, though.

It helped until it didn’t. When a week had passed without any chance to see Nalide other than at a distance, he started to really wonder why she didn’t make any attempt to come to him. It was good that she didn’t, he had no idea if he would be able to control himself alone with her, but still; it bothered him.

After a few more days, he wasn’t just bothered anymore. He was driving himself crazy. That night, he slept alone in his own bedroom, too tired to play good husband to Lyria. He had been up working since before dawn, and what little sleep he’d had before had been consumed by bad dreams. He was not spared now, either.

He woke up panting, cold sweat trickling down his skin; he felt as if he had been running for his life. An odd pressure was settled over his chest and he laid back down in his bed and breathed deeply for a few minutes; trying to calm himself. He soon fell asleep again, but the Maker saw fit to punish him even worse.

He dreamed mercilessly of the one thing he had tried so hard to put out of his mind.

Nalide was sprawled out on the bare grass before him, her pale, naked skin drenched in moonlight. The silver of it reflected in her hair; threatening to blind him. She was moving her lips but he couldn’t hear what she was saying. He leaned down over her, his knees in the ground of either side of her legs, and put his ear next to her mouth to hear her ceaseless whispering.

His eyes widened as he finally understood her, and in a flash, she was on her knees before him. He was driving himself into her without pause, like an animal, doing her bidding by fucking her harder and harder, the words still spilling over her lips; driving him half-way to insanity. There was no way he could get close enough to her, nothing would ever be enough. When she pushed him out of her and turned around, begging him to reward her by coming all over her face, sticking her tongue out in exalted anticipation, he woke up again, panting and choking even worse than before. Half-delirious with want, he dragged himself out of bed and threw his clothes on, not quite sure that he was even awake. He left his tower without bothering to shut the door behind him.

He wouldn’t do what he had dreamed, no. He hadn’t touched her, hadn’t even kissed her yet, even if the false memories of the dream were still fresh in his mind. He just had to see her, to speak to her.

Just to speak to her.

He almost didn’t see her as he walked through the garden, the darkness of night thick and unyielding, but the dying light of a few torches lit up a few strands of her hair.

She was sitting on a bench, looking up at something unknown in the pitch black sky. His approach was not silent and she turned to look at him, startled, almost afraid.

“Cullen, you shouldn’t be here.” Her voice was barely more than a whisper.

He opened his mouth to answer her, to ask her what she was doing all alone out here, when another voice cut in.

“She is right. You really shouldn’t, dear husband.”


	4. Chapter 4

Cullen flinched as he heard his wife’s voice coming out of the shadows of the garden. He hadn’t seen her at all. If it was because she was hidden by the dark or if he had simply been so enraptured by the vision of Nalide, he didn’t know. But there she was all the same, standing right beside where Nalide was sitting on the bench, both women staring at him.

“What are you doing here, Cullen?” Lyria asked, and he quickly regained his composure.

“I often walk around the grounds at night when I can’t sleep,” he said and walked up to them, stopping in front of the bench. He kept his eyes on Lyria, afraid of what his face would betray if he looked at Nalide.

Lyria stepped closer to him and put a hand against his chest. “You should have come to me, husband. I would have made you forget any worries you might have. I really enjoyed last time, you know,” she purred, not lowering her voice even a little. Cullen’s eyes flickered towards Nalide before he could help himself, and even though most of her face was hidden in shadow, he saw how her jaw tightened while she stared out into the darkness in front of her, flames dancing in the wide, reflective surfaces of her eyes.

He steeled himself against the impulse to slap Lyria’s hand away from him, defying his immediate desire to show Nalide how little her stepmother meant to him. He wanted to fall to his knees in front of her; take her hands in his and tell her that Lyria disgusted him, that he hated every Maker forsaken time that she touched him. But he did no such thing.

“I have a lot on my mind and have to prepare myself for tomorrow, we have an important strategy meeting very early,” he explained to his wife, who thankfully dropped her hand from him by then. “More importantly, what are you two doing out here so late? Skyhold is safe enough, but I don’t feel comfortable with you being out here without protection in this darkness all the same.”

“Isn’t that sweet of you,” Lyria said, mistaking his concern as if it involved her. “I don’t much like it either, but this wretch of a girl is forcing me to come out here at this ungodly hour. She frequently leaves her room at night, running off to Maker knows where instead of staying in her bed like a proper lady. She has been doing it for weeks, and thinks I haven’t noticed, with no regard for what it might say of her reputation, or _mine _for that matter.” She didn’t once look at Nalide, instead speaking about her as if she weren’t even there. Nalide said nothing.

“I just found her here sitting gawking at the sky. Just think, if people see her out and about like this, they will either think her a witch or some whore who’s waiting to spread her legs to some boy. What else would she be doing skulking around in the shadows every night? I’m sick of it.”

Lyria ended her speech by grabbing Nalide by the arm and yanking her up from where she was sitting on the bench, fingers digging into the skin of the girl’s arm. Cullen clenched his fists in anger and was just about to snarl at his wife to let her go when Nalide shook her head at him almost imperceptibly, and he steeled himself yet again to not react.

He let out a small huff and nodded to his wife. “Better take her back to bed, then,” was all he managed to get out.

“I will. Goodnight, husband. I hope you can sleep better now.”

He watched her drag Nalide with her until they both went out of sight. He stood there in the dark for a long time after that, trying to calm down. He knew he couldn’t do anything for Nalide, but tomorrow – tomorrow he would find her. He would let her escape from that terror of a mother and make her feel better, if only for a little while. He would let her know that he didn’t think her a witch or a whore, instead he would tell her all the beautiful things she was.

Tomorrow.

* * *

He barely slept for the rest of the night. He hadn’t lied when he said he had an early meeting, but when he woke up, the still gray, misty light of dawn was just beginning to paint the sky; telling him that he had a few more hours until his duties claimed him for the day. He got dressed and went outside, shivering a little in the wet morning chill and pulling his fur cloak tighter around himself before setting out for the garden again. He could only vainly hope that she would be there, that she would somehow inexplicably understand after last night that he would go there to find her again.

When he got there and found her sitting on the bench, he became convinced that they shared something wordless, something much greater than he could even comprehend. He stood in one of the doorways; watching her silently for a few moments, drinking in the sight of her. She was wearing weather appropriate clothes for once, thick skirts sticking out underneath the rich fur cloak she had around herself. She was looking up at the sky as usual, sitting very still. She didn’t move until a lock of her golden hair fell out of place and over her face and she lifted her hand to brush it away. Cullen suddenly couldn’t wait another second and walked up to her.

When she heard his footsteps, she dropped her eyes and a smile warmed her face as she caught sight of him. He sat down next to her.

“How long have you been sitting out here?” he asked.

“Oh, just for a few hours,” she said, still smiling.

“Maker, you must be freezing,” he breathed and took her gloved hand in his. Her bare arm slid out from underneath the fur, and he growled when he saw faint bruising on it. She pulled her hand back quickly and hid herself in her cloak again, looking away from him. Her smile was gone in an instant.

“Did she hurt you?”

Nalide shook her head. “This is nothing.” She still didn’t meet his eyes, and Cullen didn’t like the implications of what she was saying. “Besides, do you really even care?” Her voice came out as little more than a whisper.

Cullen stared at her. “What?”

“You married her. She is your wife. You share her bed, do you not? I hear you sometimes, you know. I see the smug look on her face the morning after you’ve been with her.”

Cullen felt his insides freeze, his stomach churning at the thought of her having heard what he was doing with Lyria. He didn’t want her to fucking know, to even think about it, even though he knew she wasn’t stupid, that she _must _know. But he didn’t fucking want it.

He grabbed her hand again. She let him but she still refused to look at him. He could see that her eyes were glinting with tears not yet spilled. “Nalide, look at me. Nalide,” he begged, but she was stubborn. “All I do, all Julian is doing, is for _you_.”

That got her attention and she finally turned her eyes to his again, confusion written all over her face.

“What… what do you mean?”

“You mean Julian didn’t tell you?”

She shook her head, unleashing a few tears with the motion. Cullen took his glove off and wiped them away. “Oh, sweetheart,” he breathed and pulled her tighter against him. “This is all to keep you safe, to stop her from sending you away. Julian made a deal with her, to get you here, where we – where _he _could protect you better.”

Nalide blinked, staring at him with her wide eyes. “So, you are saying that – that you did this for me? You don’t really want to be with her?” Her voice was all but shaking, disbelief still showing in her face.

“Maker, _no_, of course I don’t want her,” he said firmly and before he had the sense to stop himself, he grabbed her around the waist and pulled her into his lap, making her straddle him. Her breath hitched as she settled so close to him, and he pressed his forehead against hers. “If only I had seen you before, I would have done anything to… I would have stopped this, found a way, I would have taken you to a Chantry myself and made you my wife, I swear to Andraste. There is _only _you, Nalide.”

She whimpered as he uttered the last few words and he reached the absolute limit of what he could endure. “My sweet, sweet girl,” he mumbled and pressed his hand against her neck and pulled her to him, her lips brushing his for the first time. His senses exploded as he felt her soft mouth against his, those full lips opening up to his searching tongue as if it were the most natural thing in the world. His hands were grabbing her frantically and she returned the fervor; her fingers knotting his hair while they kissed breathlessly. He groaned when she moved against him, her body responding to his touch beyond his wildest expectations. She was grinding against him and as his hand slid down over her chest to find her breast, he felt her heart beat just as fast as his own. She was making the sweetest noises he had ever heard when he touched her in just the right places, and the wetness of her mouth made him so fucking hard.

He tore himself away from her lips and started kissing his way sloppily down her jaw down to her neck. The friction of her moving against his erection made him see stars and he reluctantly grabbed her waist to slow her down. “If you keep doing that, you’re going to make me come in my pants like a fucking teenager,” he breathed in her ear before biting down into her neck. She moaned deliciously and threw her head back in pleasure before crashing her lips down on his again.

“It’s nothing compared to what you do to me, Maker, _please_, it feels so good daddy,” she whispered between his lips and he just about lost it.

He yanked the end of her skirt up, ignoring the cold since he could feel the feverish heat coming off her skin anyway, and his hand traced its way up her thigh. He watched her intently the entire way, drinking in every little trace of pleasure in her face, every hitch of her uneven breathing, before he finally found his way between her legs.

“Do you want daddy to touch you, sweetheart?” he whispered and she nodded frantically, unable to speak. He kissed her hard again and groaned into her mouth when he felt how the fabric covering her cunt was completely soaked through. He began rubbing her wetness slowly, reveling in how it made her mewl, how she begged him to never stop.

It wasn’t long until she was pleading for more. “Please, daddy, I want – oh, _Maker –_ please, please, _please -_”

“What, honey? What do you want?” His voice was little more than a growl, he was so damn close to coming just from touching her.

“I want to feel you inside me,” she begged before a loud moan stopped her from saying more. He placed his free hand over her mouth.

“I _want _to, baby, I want to fuck you so fucking bad, you have no idea how much daddy wants you, but you would wake up the whole keep if I did. But I promise I’ll make you feel good anyway.”

He was moving his fingers over her wet slit faster and faster, burying the soaked fabric of her underwear between her pussy lips.

She nodded, her eyes hazed over as if she were drunk. “Just promise me,” she whispered, “that you—oh, holy gods—that you _will_.”

“Nothing could ever keep me away from you again,” he promised and renewed his fervor, and it wasn’t long before he muffled her cries with kisses as she came against him.

He withdrew his hand and smoothed her skirt down while she was still panting in his lap. After a minute or two of heavy breathing, she placed her face lovingly in the crook of his neck and he stroked her back gently.

“What about you?” she purred and moved her hand down over his chest but he caught her hand in his before she could go any further.

“Don’t worry about it,” he smiled. “I’m saving it for when I’m going to fuck you for the first time, just like I promised. I am a patient man, and if you are a good little girl, daddy is going to reward you just like you want when the time is right,” he said and kissed her fingers, one by one.

“When?” she demanded, her big eyes staring at him full of sin.

He raised an eyebrow at her, trying to look stern but he couldn’t keep a playful smile off his lips.

She pouted with her mouth but he knew she was only doing it for the sake of their little daddy-daughter game. “Fine. I guess you are the one in charge, _Father._”

“That is exactly right, sweetheart,” he murmured and kissed her adoring face all over before assaulting her lips again. He was still hard from before and had to muster every ounce of his willpower to part himself from her. “But I promise it won’t be long. I can’t fucking resist you, but we have to be very careful, you hear?” He was suddenly serious. “No one can see us, no one can find out, until we have figured out what to do.”

Nalide looked at him equally serious. “You think there is anything we _can _do?”

“There has to be. I – I don’t want you to have to watch me with Lyria.” His voice broke a little, and he couldn’t look at her.

“I don’t either, but – Cullen, there is something else.”

Her tone made him fix his eyes on her face again. She had slid off him and sat beside him on the bench again, the first rays of sunlight hitting her face. People would start milling around sooner of later.

He still had her hands in his and he squeezed them hard. “What is it, love?”

“Perhaps you know by now how much I enjoy being outside, seeing the sky above me. It helps me think. And lately, I have been out almost every night, just like my dear old mother told you. I – I can’t sleep. I can’t stop thinking about you. She doesn’t know that of course, but it has been making her angry all the same, my ‘unladylike’ behaviour, as she puts it. She spends half her days now with her new plan.

“New plan?” Cullen had a bad feeling in his stomach.

Nalide nodded, looking sad. “She wants to marry me off. Thinks it will temper me.”

Cullen blinked. He shouldn’t be surprised, Julian had warned him that this might happen, but the thought of Nalide marrying someone else was unacceptable all the same.

He was quiet for what felt like a long time.

“Cullen?” Nalide’s voice was low, careful.

“It won’t come to that, I swear. But you have to be careful. I hate to say it but you have to be more compliant, do what she wants, if it takes her mind off marrying you off.”

“I will, but I’m not sure it will help. Perhaps Julian could talk her out of it.”

Cullen nodded. “Yes. I don’t really know the specifics of the arrangement of you being here, love, but I know she has promised to not send you to the Chantry as long as she gets what she wants.”

Nalide rested her head on Cullen’s shoulder and he put his arm around her. “Do you know when my brother will be back?” she asked.

“Soon, I think.”

“How… how are you going to convince him to speak to Lyria about this without telling him about us?”

“I’ll find a way, sweetheart.” He leaned back and let his eyes roam over her face. She looked unhappy, and he was desperate to reassure her.

“Come here, sweetest. I’ll make you feel better,” he whispered and kissed her. It was slow this time, his tongue playing with hers, letting her sweet breathing calm him, but after a minute the fire she provoked in him threatened to roar again and he had to let his sense win out this time and he pulled away.

“Just act like a good girl and I promise, I’ll see you soon.” He stood up and kissed her forehead. “Now, go back to bed before your mother finds you gone again.”

* * *

He was the one who had told _her _to be careful, to make sure that no one suspected them. No more nightly escapes to the garden for her, just like he had demanded of her. But he still went there every single night, hoping against all reason to see her again; to get her alone with him. But the garden remained empty.

So he did something incredibly reckless. He saw her walking across the courtyard one day, and he approached her before he even had time to think. She almost walked straight into him as he just placed himself in her path. She yelped in surprise and she stopped whatever she was about to say when she looked up and saw the look on his face. He went to grab her hand but stopped himself at the last second; realizing just how many people were around. He was as good as famous and Nalide had the attention of half the men in the keep, Maker knew how many pairs of eyes were on them in that instant.

Nalide coughed. “Father,” she said when she found her voice again. “I was just on my way to see Mother, she wants me to -”

“It will have to wait,” he stated flatly. “Please come with me.” He turned around and walked towards a door in the side of the building, leading down into a food cellar. He didn’t stop to see if she followed, instead yanking the door up and going inside. He heard her close it behind them. It was dark in there, a single torch lighting up the damp room.

He turned around and faced her.

“What-” she started but he silenced her by bending down and kissing her hard. She was surprised at first but responded after a mere second or two, molding herself against him as he tugged at her lips with his teeth, pushing her against the wall next to the door. He knew it might leave marks on her but he couldn’t stop himself.

“Maker, I have missed you so much,” he whispered between kisses and her breath caught in her throat as his hands slid down her body. She kissed him back feverishly, her hands clawing at his shoulders; desperate for him to come even closer.

“I know we don’t have much time,” he murmured, “but I just had to feel you, just for a few minutes, Nalide, Maker.” He knotted his fingers in her hair and let his other hand slide down over her breast. “You don’t know what you do to me,” he said, his voice pained and he brushed his lips over the hollow of her neck.

“Cullen, _please_,” she whispered, “you can’t do this to me, you know I won’t be able to stop.” She moaned but then she tried to push him away. “You’re the one who told me to be careful, Andraste, every one of those people out there saw us go in here!”

“I don’t care,” he growled and kissed her again, and she let him all too willingly. They were both lost in each other until they bumped into one of the shelves and she pulled her mouth away from his.

“Mother will see me all disheveled like this, and she might hear that _you _are the one who went in here in the dark with me before. Do you want her to kill me? Or worse, marry me off by tomorrow’s first light? She won’t ever let me see you again.” Her lips quivered as if the thought made her want to burst into tears.

Cullen pulled away from her, cursing himself for being so fucking stupid. “I’m sorry, love, I just couldn’t-”

“I know, I know, me too,” she said, her voice hoarse as she tried to comb her hair with her fingers before smoothing out her dress and trying to look somewhat presentable. She caught a look of his crestfallen face and she stopped what she was doing and embraced him. “I’ll try to slip away one night, alright?” she whispered in his ear. “I’ll come to you in your tower, for a little while at least. I’ll make sure Mother is asleep.”

Cullen wanted nothing more, but he was still worried. “We work very late in my office sometimes. You have to make absolute sure no one sees you go in there. This time, here, we can make it look innocent,” he said and looked around him. He picked up an array of cheeses and fruits from the shelves around them and stuffed them into her arms. “Here, tell your mother I gave you this for her and that I’m thinking of her, even though I’m very busy and wish I could join her for lunch,” he said with a grimace at the preposterous lie. “But you creeping into my tower in the middle of the night will be a lot harder to explain if anyone sees.”

Nalide nodded. “I’ll be careful.” She reached up and kissed him quickly before going out through the door he held opened for her. She turned around and looked at him one last time. “I want you to know that I’m just as desperate to see you as you are. I promise it won’t be long.” With that, she disappeared out of his sight.

* * *

He waited, patiently at first, he had an incredible amount of work to do. But the days dragged on and Nalide began to consume his every thought again, making it very hard for him to focus. If he could only have her, just for one night, he was sure he would be able to do his job better again. As it were, he couldn’t even stomach playing the good husband to Lyria in bed, but the keep was bustling and she knew he was extremely busy so for the moment, that wasn’t a problem. Him constantly thinking of Nalide, however, _was _a problem. Leliana looked at him sharply every day in the war room when he fumbled with his words or missed details in the plans, but he always managed to escape any potential lectures from her by being the first to leave. But this couldn’t keep going on and he knew it. But there was nothing he could do but wait.

After working late one night, he had gone to bed exhausted, stripping all of his clothes off and throwing them onto the floor and just as his head hit the pillow, he heard the familiar creak of the ladder leading up into his bedroom. He sat up in bed, his hand reaching for the dagger under the pillow, but his readiness to fight disappeared and was replaced by elation when the moonlight illuminated the fairy-like creature that came into his room.

It was Nalide, wearing nothing but an almost see-through shift. His eyes went wide at the sight.

“D-did you wear nothing else on your way here?” he stuttered and Nalide smiled at him.

“Of course I did, but I left my cloak downstairs. Don’t… don’t you like it?”

She stood there looking like every man’s fantasy, straight out of the countless dreams he’d had about her, questioning whether he _liked _it.

“Are you mad girl?” He stood up, letting the covers slide off him. She stared at his naked body up and down with wide, hungry eyes and he felt his male pride surge. “Come to me, sweetest,” he said and she tore her eyes away from his body and looked at his face again and did as he asked. She walked up to him and he reached out to her, caressing her cheek gently while pulling her to him. He looked down into her face and with a serious expression. “You are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. Waiting for you has been absolute torture.”

“You haven’t been to see Mother in a long time.”

“I can’t stand the thought of even looking at her when all I want is _you_.” He leaned down breathed hard in anticipation, hovering over her lips with his own.

She squirmed in his arms, desperate for him to make a move.

“Nalide, sweetest… Have you done this before?”

She shook her head and he felt her tremble slightly as his fingers grazed the skin of her neck.

“Have you saved yourself for daddy?” The thought made his voice hoarse with lust.

“Yes,” she breathed. “You are the only one allowed to touch me. And I want you to so, so badly,” she whimpered.

“I promise you princess, I will make you feel so fucking good,” he said and then he kissed her with all the pent-up frustration and longing the last few weeks had caused. He felt her open her mouth to him immediately and he groaned into it when he felt her eager, wet tongue meet his.

He was so fucking hard for her already. “This needs to come off,” he growled and grabbed the fabric at the bottom of her shift and yanked it over her head. He looked at her, really _looked _at her and he almost staggered backwards.

“So beautiful,” he mumbled and then he sat down on the bed, drinking in the sight of her standing there naked in front of him, the moonlight bathing her hair in silver, just like in his dreams. His eyes roamed over her small but full, round, _perfect _breasts, before sliding down over her stomach and further still. He watched hungrily as she parted her legs slightly for him, allowing him to see every inch of her.

“I want to do so many filthy things to you, sweetheart,” he said, his breathing ragged. His cock was standing straight up, and her eyes were fixed on it. He stroked it slowly, his eyes never leaving her face. “Do you want to feel this inside you?”

“Oh, yes, daddy,” she said and smiled shyly at him. It made him fucking crazy with want, but he wanted to take this slow.

“Come here,” he urged, and she took a step forward to stand between his legs. “I want to make sure you’re wet enough for me.” He leaned forward then and let his tongue slide over her slit. The sound she made, Maker, it was like nothing else. She tasted sweet; like sex and honey and something more that he couldn’t place. It was the most intoxicating sensation he’d ever felt, and he hadn’t even fucked her yet. She pressed herself against him and he licked at her hungrily, reveling in how in made her react. He stopped after a few minutes, ignoring her protests and pulled her down into his lap. “Taste yourself on me, sweetie,” he whispered and kissed her, smearing her wetness into her own mouth. It seemed to drive her wild as she bucked against him, desperate for more contact.

He shifted her so that she was straddling him; his cock sliding against her slit without penetrating her. It felt so fucking good, and he wanted nothing more than to impale her with his cock, but he would be patient. He was still kissing her, it was filthy; sloppy, driving her wild against him, when he slipped a finger into her dripping wet pussy. She cried out and he didn’t bother telling her to be quiet. He wanted her to enjoy this and his own blood was pounding hearing her like that, no regard to anyone who might hear them. He was working his finger in and out of her and he lowered his mouth to catch her breast between his teeth. Her breathing came in short bursts mixed with the filthy sounds she was making, and he licked and sucked on her nipple while driving another finger into her.

She was so damn tight, he had no idea how he would fit into her, but she didn’t let him think about that for long.

“Please, please, _please,_ daddy, I need you inside me, please, I want to feel you in me when you make me come,” she begged and what little remained of his self-control went flying out the window. He slipped his fingers out of her and placed his cock against her entrance with her still on top of him. He eased himself into her bit by bit, his eyes rolling into the back of his head. Her walls clamped around his cock and he gritted his teeth trying not to come right then and there. He moved her up and down on him, sliding a little further into her each time, careful not to hurt her too much. She hissed when he reached resistance, but she forced his hands to keep moving her on top of him.

She let out a pained noise and he could feel something trickle out of her. He glanced down and saw blood.

“Do you want to stop, love? I don’t want to hurt you-”

“No!” she exclaimed. “It only hurt for a little bit, don’t stop, it’s just starting to feel good again.” She looked down at herself, the blood now running down her thigh. “Unless you think it’s disgusting, I understand if-”

He silenced her with a feverish kiss. “Are you insane?” he whispered and started moving inside her again, urging her on with his hands. He leaned back and drank in the sight of her, his beautiful girl sitting naked on top of him, his cock inside of her while her sweet, virgin blood was running down her thighs. “Seeing you like this is a blessing, what you’ve given me is a blessing.” His voice was rough as he stared into her face, immense pleasure spreading through his body as she was fucking herself on top of him, but it was nothing compared to seeing the look on her face.

“I’ve seen visions of you like this,” he mumbled while pulling her chest to him, fucking her and pressing himself against her at the same time. “I – Maker’s breath, you feel so good – I think sometimes that Andraste sent you to me.”

She grabbed his face with both her hands and pressed her forehead against his, never stopping her movements. “I know she has,” she whispered. “What we have is holy, Cullen. Our union is holy,” she breathed and he believed every word. The moonlight made her hair seem like it was glowing around her head, and he stared mesmerized at her while she was moaning out her pleasure louder and louder.

He wanted her louder still. He grabbed her waist and flipped them down into the bed so that he was on top of her. Her eyes and her face screamed at him that she wanted more, that she craved him harder, and he would give it to her. He pushed himself into her again, and her eyes lit up with new sin. She had never felt anything like this before, of course.

“Do you want daddy to fuck you harder?” he growled, barely keeping himself from doing so before her answer came.

“Yes! Oh, bless me Father,” she moaned and he fucking lost it. He grabbed her wrists and pinned them above her head and drove into her relentlessly, groaning loudly, which seemed to drive her wild. She was fucking him back with a fervor he had never felt in any woman before, like she couldn’t get close enough to him.

“More, I want _more_,” she demanded and he gave it to her so willingly. He would give her anything she asked of him. He was fucking her so hard the bed shook, and it wasn’t long before she started to shake around him too. When she clamped down around him, biting her lip to keep herself from screaming out her orgasm, he let go of the little scrap of remaining self-control he had left and spilled himself inside of her, more than he was sure he ever had before.

He was still groaning and she was in the middle of her ecstasy when the door to his office below banged open.

“Cullen, are you up there? Are you – Oh.”

Cullen threw his hand over Nalide’s mouth and her eyes went wide. She bit down on her tongue and Cullen slowly removed his hand from her. They were both sweating; panting, and he saw the panic rise in Nalide’s eyes.

“Is that my brother?” she whispered.


	5. Chapter 5

Cullen let a near-silent string of curses loose as he realized that Nalide was right – that _was _Julian’s voice coming from his office below, while Cullen was still buried inside the man’s baby sister. He put a finger to his lip; motioning for Nalide to keep quiet before taking a deep breath and pulling himself out of her, the gears in his head turning frantically.

“I’ll be right down,” he called to Julian while throwing his clothes on. He went down the ladder, Nalide’s wide eyes staring at him with fright as he descended before she disappeared from his view. He touched the floor below and spotted Julian leaning against the desk with his arms crossed over his chest.

“I do hope that’s not my dear old mother I just heard you pleasure up there,” Julian said and made a gagging sound.

Cullen swallowed hard but his face was cool. He raised an amused eyebrow, defying the tight grip his chest was constricted in. “You’ll be relieved to know it is not.”

Julian breathed a mock sigh of relief. “Thank the Maker. I hope you’re careful though. I don’t begrudge you having a bit of fun, heaven knows I can’t fault you for it. Just make sure Lyria doesn’t find out.”

“Of course.”

Julian’s eyes landed on the fur cloak lying on the floor behind Cullen, the rich, white silk ribbon holding it together laying haphazardly on top of it. He whistled.

“My, my, I see you’ve gotten a taste of the good life if you’ve managed to get a woman who can afford such things into your bed.” Julian looked amused but Cullen was more than eager to change the subject.

“While I am glad to see you back and safe, Inquisitor, I have to ask what is so important it couldn’t wait ‘til morning?”

“I have much to tell you and I thought you would want to know right away, so you would have time to think through the tactics before the meeting tomorrow. But since you are otherwise engaged, I suppose it can wait until the morning when I tell the others.”

Cullen nodded. “I appreciate it.”

Julian went on his way and Cullen shut the door behind him and sagged against it. That had been close. Too fucking close. And yet when his eyes turned to the loft above him, he found himself utterly lacking regret. The creature waiting for him up there was worth any risk. With new assurance, he climbed back up there.

She was sitting straight up in bed, the covers wrapped tightly around her underneath her arms.

“Has he gone?” she whispered. Cullen pulled his shirt over his head while he walked over and sat down on the bed. He pulled her to him, the covers slipping off her in the process, and she was straddling him; naked, bewitching. Her golden hair fell down over the soft skin of her shoulders, down over her breasts. His breath caught in his throat as he looked at her. She was so infinitely beautiful and he was suddenly overcome with fierce possessiveness.

“You are mine,” he stated, his voice deep and rumbling. She said nothing, she just looked at him with wide eyes while his hands squeezed her lower back, pressing her into him. “Only mine. I will _never _let anyone keep us apart, never let anyone else lay as much as a finger on you. And _you_ won’t let anyone else touch you either, ever. Do you understand?”

He didn’t know if the look on his face was that of demand or pleading, or both. But her eyes glinted in the moonlight as she breathed her answer.

“Never. I swear, Cullen.”

“That’s my girl,” he mumbled, ghosting his lips over hers.

“What about my brother?” she whispered.

“He doesn’t know anything. Now be a good, little girl and spread your legs wide for daddy,” he commanded and she did what she was told while he took himself out of his pants.

He fucked her hard, maddened by the scent of her arousal, by the small sounds that escaped her throat. He gripped her arms harder and harder, not caring that it was stupid to leave marks on her. He bit down into her shoulder, not knowing what to do with himself and the immense pleasure she was giving him except to put it marked on her body. The animal in him wanted to do a thousand times worse when she moaned uncontrollably as he broke her skin with his teeth and he realized that she _liked _it.

His vision tinged red at the edges as the beast in him came out now that he knew that she wanted it. He grabbed a fistful of her hair and pulled back, exposing her neck to him while she gasped in pain. He began circling her clit with his finger, eager to teach her to associate the pain with intense pleasure. He licked at the skin of her throat, careful not to bite her there; it would be too visible. Her fingers dug into his arms and he hissed as she clamped down even tighter around his cock.

“Daddy, please-” Her voice was strained from how he was holding her. He loosened his grip a little on her hair but she quickly protested. “No!” She looked at him with pleading eyes. “Harder, again, please daddy – oh, holy gods – I want to feel you closer, _harder_.”

She was staring at him; eyes begging, and it was too much for him. With raspy, half-strangled words he told her exactly what she did to him while he held onto her and stood up, craving a surface harder than his bed to fuck her against. He took a few steps, her legs wrapped around him and his cock still buried inside her, and pushed her against the wall. He fucked her as hard as she begged him to, calling her sweet and filthy things while she thanked blessed Andraste for the gift of him inside her. Her little prayers between her moaning was filling him with an even more wicked sense of pleasure; his own stepdaughter, begging, praying, sounding like a filthy, little whore while her daddy was fucking her senseless against a wall.

He came inside of her with a drawn-out groan and they were both panting and sweating for a few moments before he let her down. She looked up at him with pure adoration in her eyes and reached up to kiss him. His hands were planted on either side of her head against the stone and he had to tear himself away, feeling how his cock was beginning to twitch impossibly again.

“What you do to me, sweetest, I don’t know how it is even possible,” he murmured and pulled her against him in an embrace. “But we need to get you back to your room now, so that you can clean up before your mother wakes up.”

Nalide nodded. “Of course.”

_Good girl._

They got dressed and he insisted on walking her back to the part of the keep she was staying in, ignoring her protests.

“It’s pitch black outside, beloved, I’m not letting you out of my sight until you are safely inside.”

They parted at one of the doors without anything more than a shared look and she disappeared inside before he shut the door behind him. He was just returning to the battlements outside his tower when he heard a quiet voice from somewhere behind him.

“I wonder if the Inquisitor would be interested to know that his most trusted friend was defiling his little sister like this, Commander.”

Cullen’s head whipped around and landed on someone just emerging from the shadows. The moonlight illuminated a man Cullen barely recognized but vaguely. Some mercenary from a company Julian had brought in some time ago?

“What in the fade are you talking about?” he snarled.

The man snickered. “Don’t even try. Ser High-and-Mighty, fucking a girl barely more than a child, his own stepdaughter no less. I would be impressed if you hadn’t been so sloppy about it. You think no one would hear you? I did. I heard exactly what you were doing to that girl, and I saw that pretty, young thing leave with you just now. Would be a shame if the Inquisitor found out.” He looked pleased with himself.

“What do you want?” Cullen felt deathly calm.

“What do you think? I know you Inquisition-people are rolling in money right now. Everyone is tripping over themselves to fund you. I’m just humbly asking for a small piece of it and I can be on my way. Although I wouldn’t mind a little taste of her myself before I leave, now that I know what a little whore she-”

The man barely had time to react before Cullen had moved and put his hands around his throat, cutting off both the air and the rest of what he was going to say.

“I should kill you just for even _thinking _about her, let alone threatening to do anything that would cause harm to her,” Cullen snarled and tightened his grip, squeezing at the man’s throat. Hands were clawing at his, trying to break free but to no avail. Cullen was bigger, reflexes sharp as a blade and above all he was furious_. _“As if that wasn’t enough, a self-centered weasel like you have no place in the Inquisition. It’s good riddance from all angles.”

The man might have been trying to beg, but his sounds were incomprehensible. Cullen’s eyes were black with hatred. Who the fuck did that lowlife think he was, to threaten him, to threaten Nalide? He snarled again and put all his strength into his hands and he felt the snap rather than heard it when the man’s neck broke and he hung limp in Cullen’s grip.

He grunted and lifted the body up and unceremoniously threw it over the side of the battlements, letting it plunge into the abyss below before anyone saw him. With that, he returned to his office and poured himself a stiff drink, flexing his aching hands. He was still angry – so angry, that anyone had dared to try to disturb the sanctity of what he and Nalide had. But he did have to think about how close it had come. If the man had not tried to blackmail him but gone straight to Julian instead-

Cullen didn’t even want to think about it.

* * *

He woke up feeling anxious the next day. He prayed no one else had seen him with Nalide, or seen him throw someone’s body over the side of the wall. He didn’t think so, but one could never be sure. The best he could hope for if that was the case was that it had been one of Leliana’s sentries, reporting only to her.

He got up and got dressed, another burst of anxiety attacking his stomach as he remembered how he had been a little too rough with Nalide after Julian had left. Not that she didn’t seem to like it, but he must have left a lot of marks on her. It was what he wanted at the time, but now it seemed too risky. He just seemed incapable of thinking straight when she was around. He had to keep her safe, but he couldn’t protect her from his own ferocity, and the fact that he knew she wanted him to do his worst wasn’t helping his self-control in the slightest.

To his relief, the day went on without a hitch. He met Julian and the others in the war room and neither Julian or Leliana seemed any different. Julian’s news about their operations were too big to focus on anything else anyway. The Inquisition was making great progress and Cullen let himself concentrate fully on his work.

That evening, he knew he had to go to Lyria’s bed, no matter how much it disgusted him, lest he risk making her suspicious. Things were calmer now that Julian had returned and even though a lot of work still had to be done, he could not make up an excuse not to spend half an hour with his wife before going to sleep.

Cullen knocked on the door to Lyria’s quarters with a stern expression on his face. The door opened and his heart dropped in his chest when he saw large, blue eyes looking up at him.

He stood there staring at Nalide for a few moments, before she spoke. It broke his heart how weak she sounded.

“Is it time tonight, then? For a little marital bliss?” Her words were meant to be venomous, he supposed, but she seemed too sad to really have it in her.

“I- Yes.” It was all he could say. He half-wished that she would protest, make something up that would save them both from the pain, but she did not. Instead, she just opened the door further and stood out of the way to let him in. He steeled himself and entered but stopped when he heard a small plea leave her lips behind him.

“Please,” she whispered. “Please try to not let me hear.”

He couldn’t look at her, and he heard her footsteps fade and the slam of a door leading into another room – probably her bedroom. Thankfully, Lyria’s bedroom was on the other side of the living space he was standing in. He marched over to his wife’s room and found her sitting in front of her vanity, brushing out her long, black hair. She jumped a little as he slammed the door shut behind him and looked over her shoulder at him.

“Cullen. I am glad that you came. It’s been quite some time,” she said and stood up, abandoning her brush to the table. “I have missed you.”

Cullen wanted to sneer at her fake smile, wondering why she was even bothering. But he knew he should try at least a little bit to get in her good graces, if only it would allow him a little more control of her and thus over what she could do to Nalide.

He sat down in a chair in front of the fire and Lyria poured him some wine. He took a sip while she positioned herself behind him, massaging his shoulders like they were any normal married couple.

“Long day?” she asked. It would have sounded nice if he hadn’t hated her so much, but he let her keep touching him.

He grunted a yes in response. “I wanted to ask you,” he started. “We’ve barely spoken since our wedding, not about the future anyway.”

She released him and sat in the chair opposite him and took a glass of wine for herself. “Ask away,” she said and smiled.

“You know the Inquisition is in the middle of a war. I don’t know how long it will go on for. But if it does end – what would you wish for us, then?”

“Well, just because the war would be over doesn’t necessarily mean the Inquisition would. You are the Commander of the greatest military force in Thedas at the moment, or close to it anyway. I would do whatever you desire of me. It is… a privilege to be your wife, dear husband.” She sounded sincere enough, but it couldn’t be that simple.

“I would probably be on the move a lot. You would perhaps have to go back to Ostwick alone for some time.”

“Of course,” she nodded. “I don’t know what you Fereldans are used to, but we Marchers are more than familiar with husbands who are rarely home.”

“And what about Nalide?” He looked her straight in the eyes, letting his voice betray no emotion. “What do you intend to do with her?”

Lyria cocked her head a bit to the side and looked curiously at him. “She is not your daughter in anything but name, Cullen. She’s not even really mine, the little nightmare. You don’t have to pretend to care.”

Cullen’s eyes narrowed. “She is officially a part of my family now, and what she does will reflect on me.”

Lyria mistook his concern for pride. “I promise you, I’ll make her see sense and behave like a proper lady. I’ll have no talk about her ‘free spirit’ that her brother always goes on and on about. I have promised Julian not to send the girl to the Chantry, although I believe that would be the best way to straighten her out. But I’ve promised all the same. So there is only one thing left to do, of course.”

“And what is that?”

“She needs to marry, naturally. I would have had her married off as soon as her first blood came if I’d had my way, but her father refused. He always thought of her as a child, but she is _not_. There is a wild thing in her that needs to be leashed. Only a strict, proper man can sort her out.”

Cullen’s nails dug into the palm of his hand. He couldn’t claim that she was too young to marry – she was not. Another year or two and it would be strange if she hadn’t already. She was noble, beautiful and little sister to the most powerful man on the continent. He wouldn’t pretend himself so blind as not to know that.

“People must be lining up for her hand, surely,” he said and stroked his chin, playing the part of cynical, power-hungry stepfather perfectly. Lyria certainly looked like she approved.

“Indeed they are. I just don’t know which match will be most favorable for House Trevelyan yet.”

Cullen stood up and walked over to her, making his move while she was still impressed that he seemed to think as she did. He grabbed her chin and angled her up harshly to look at him towering over her. “You will make no such decision without my approval. You are not just a Trevelyan any more, you are a Rutherford, too. And I will not allow the whims of a woman to steer the course of my family.”

“But of course,” she said dutifully and even gave him a slight smile despite his grip on her. He released her and caressed her cheek.

“Good. That makes me very pleased to hear, dear.” He wanted to throw up using any kind of endearment to her but he was bent on playing the role perfectly.

She stood up and leaned into him. “I only wish to please you, my lord husband. You have honored me greatly by making me your wife. All those other harlots back home will go green with envy when they hear I’ve married the Inquisition Commander, if they haven’t already heard. Oh, what I wouldn’t give to see their faces when they do!” Her green eyes shone with malice, not a trace of the blue adoration he craved.

“If you wish to please me, you will let me do to you what I want now. I’ve had a really long day.”

Lyria slid her shift up over her shoulders and threw it on the ground. “Anything you want,” she said and tugged at the strings to his trousers.

What he did to her in bed that night was far from the quiet Nalide had asked of him, but he would explain to her later. He used his belt on his wife first, ordering her on all fours on the bed, smacking her ass with it again and again, harder each time, leaving the skin red and almost broken. Lyria took it without a word of complaint. He pinched her nipples to make her gasp in pain but all she did was moan and ask for more. He pulled her hair, he slapped her, spit on her, he shoved his fingers violently in and out of her cunt, but it didn’t seem to hurt her like he wanted. She was too wet to be hurt. He finally fucked her ass; roughly, while pinning her hands above them to the wall. He was furious when she had an orgasm while he was inside her and had to stop himself from hurting her too badly when he gripped her hips and came inside her ass.

He pushed himself out of her and slumped down beside her. After he had regained his breath, he sat up and started to put on his clothes again while she lay there watching him.

“Why do you accept it?” he asked suddenly.

“Accept what?”

“What I’m doing to you. It can’t make you very comfortable.”

She looked confused. “Comfortable? My job is not to be comfortable. A wife’s duty to her husband is absolute. Your pleasure is the only thing that matters.”

“Is that what you’re teaching Nalide too, in preparation for her marriage? To shut up and take it, to please her husband in any way that she can?”

“Of course. That girl needs to learn that more than most.”

He left even angrier than when he came, and glanced at Nalide’s closed bedroom door on his way out with a harsh twinge of guilt. He had to see her tomorrow and explain.

* * *

Seeing her, it turned out, was easier said than done. He didn’t, in fact, see her for days. He thought of asking Julian or Lyria where she was but didn’t want to draw attention to the fact that he kept his eyes open for her.

On a whim, he left his tower one night to search the garden for her and he breathed a sigh of relief when he caught sight of her, even though it made him a little irritated that she risked coming out there.

But when he approached her and she saw him, she stood up and began to walk away from him. He had to call out to her several times before she stopped, her back to him. He caught up with her and looked down on her face, which was mostly cloaked in shadow. He put his hands on her arms but she didn’t move.

“Sweetheart, please look at me,” he said, voice low and careful. She said nothing and refused to obey him. “Nalide. Look at me. If this is about the other night, I-”

Her chin snapped up then, to stare at him with challenge in her eyes. “I _asked _you not to put me through—hearing—and then what do you do? You did the worst thing you could possibly do. I had to listen for _hours_.”

She didn’t need to say what she was talking about. He opened his mouth to defend himself but she cut him off before he even began. “I don’t understand it. I see how you look at me, and I see how much loathing is in your eyes when you look at her, even if no one else does. I _see_, Cullen. And yet… What would you say if I had a fiance or a husband, and _you _had to listen to his groans of pleasure all night? To me squirming underneath him, moaning and -”

“Stop it.” His grip on her had tightened and he didn’t want to hear another word.

She sneered at him. “You are a hypocrite, _Father_.”

“I know,” he said. “But what I did to Lyria, I did because I wanted to cause her pain.”

Nalide’s eyes narrowed at him. “It sure didn’t sound like she was in pain.”

“I _wanted _her to suffer, I wanted you to hear what I did to her, that it wasn’t tender or loving, that it was nothing like when I am with you. All of her moans, everything that comes out of her mouth is false. She only did it because she believes it is her duty to bow to my every whim.”

Nalide’s face twisted in fury and it caught him by surprise how fierce she looked. “I _hate_ her. She’s been controlling my life ever since she weaseled her way into our house in Ostwick, and now it’s even worse.” She sighed and relaxed in his arms a bit. “I know you don’t have a choice but to go to her sometimes.”

“It’s only to keep her happy so that she doesn’t focus her attention on you, love, I swear.”

“I believe you.” She gave him a weak smile. “And I suppose it’s better that you are harsh with her. It—it’s not like when you are rough with me, is it?”

Cullen hissed. “_No_. Not even close. With you, it’s because I want you so much it pains me, I have to get it out, I have to show you. It might hurt a little, but I would never really hurt you. You know this, don’t you?”

She nodded. “Tell me—tell me how much you despise her,” she whispered and her hand slid down over his chest.

He raised an eyebrow at her but when he felt her put her hand over his cock, he wasted no time in obeying her. “I despise her,” he breathed, moving them both into the shadows underneath the roof leading to the alcoves. He yanked her skirt up as he continued to let his hatred spill over his lips. “She disgusts me; her cold, dead eyes makes me want to hurt her even harder.”

“More,” Nalide whispered and Cullen moaned as she wrapped her small hand around his cock and slid it up and down his length.

“It’s hatred that makes me drive myself into her. With you –“ he buried himself in her wet, tight cunt and she gasped as he filled her up “- all I feel is desire and affection, I want to make you feel so good, I want my sweet, darling girl to feel her daddy’s cock so deep inside.” He thrust into her against the wall, her legs clamped tightly around him. Her warm wetness around him made him throw his head back in pure pleasure. “You feel like the heavens have come down to me, Nalide, nothing like her. You are the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.”

“I’m only yours,” she breathed and kissed and licked his ear.

“Oh, fuck, baby, that feels so fucking good.” He wasn’t being quiet but he was beyond control again. “Do you want daddy’s come in your mouth, sweetie?”

“Yes!” She got down to her knees and he couldn’t believe his eyes as she took him into her mouth. He lasted only seconds before he spurted thick, white streams onto her tongue. She swallowed it like a hungry little slut.

He pulled her up and held her close to him. His heart was still beating hard in his chest when he leaned back and cupped his hands around her face.

“So beautiful,” he mumbled. “I love you, Nalide.”

She stared up at him in wonder.

* * *

The next day was a cold one again, the last claws of frost biting at the air before spring arrived in full force. Julian and Cullen had their winter cloaks around their shoulders as they sat outside for a rare quiet moment after lunch, playing a game of chess and discussing the Inquisition’s next move. It was too cold for many others to be around and that was exactly why they had chosen the spot.

Julian looked up over Cullen’s shoulder and his face broke out in a warm smile. Cullen felt his insides churn in anticipation – to his knowledge only one person could make Julian look that happy. But as he heard footsteps approach them from behind, he saw Julian’s smile falter. Cullen turned around quickly and saw that it was indeed Nalide, smiling at them both. She seemed happy but the look on her brother’s face made her look suddenly uncertain. She stopped beside the table and Julian stared at her.

“What’s wrong?” Cullen asked, confused as to why his friend would look so weird seeing his sister approach.

Julian slowly got up to his feet, never taking his eyes off Nalide. He raised his finger and pointed to her.

“What the _fuck _is that?” His voice was nothing more than a malicious snarl.

Nalide looked taken aback. “Wh-what do you mean, brother?”

Cullen’s eyes widened when he understood. Julian was pointing at the white silk ribbon on Nalide’s cloak. The same one he had seen on Cullen’s floor when he’d barged in on him fucking someone in his loft.

Julian’s eyes snapped to Cullen and he suddenly understood why Julian’s enemies were so afraid of him.

“Are you fucking my sister?” His voice was incredulous.

“Julian!” Nalide protested but he didn’t look at her.

“I said, are you _fucking _my baby sister?” He swept the chessboard off the table, the pieces still clattering to the ground as he took a step toward Cullen with clenched fists.

Nalide grabbed her brother’s arm but he shook her off. “Julian, please-”

Julian looked at her and at Cullen again.

“Why aren’t you denying it?” he asked through gritted teeth, as if he were angry that Cullen didn’t even try to lie to him.

“Julian, let me explain-”

The other man stepped forward, ignoring his sister’s pleas. He seemed to tower over Cullen, even though they were the same height. He grabbed his collar and yanked at him hard.

“Answer me or I swear to the Maker I will knock you out cold. _Was_ that Nalide up there that night?”

Cullen didn’t get any words out, Julian was holding him at his throat too tightly. Nalide’s scream was the last thing he heard before Julian’s fist came flying at him.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been a while, I've been having some health issues.

Nalide watched how Julian’s fist connected with Cullen’s jaw with a slight green sparkle. A sharp intake of breath stuck in her throat was the only sound she managed to make when Cullen dropped to the ground.

She walked over to him on unsteady feet and knelt beside him, taking his face into her hands. Blood was trickling out of his mouth and his eyes were closed. She looked up at her brother who was towering over the both of them. “What did you do?” she whispered.

“He’ll live.” Julian’s voice was cold.

His unemotional response woke the fire in her. “What is _wrong _with you?” she demanded. “Why would you hurt him? He has done nothing but keep me safe.”

“Kept you safe? He has been taking advantage of you!”

“_You _left me to the wolves, Julian,” Nalide snarled at him as she stood up suddenly, her eyes glaring fury into his. He looked taken aback. “You left me with Lyria, knowing full well that she had Father under her complete control.”

“I didn’t have a choice!” he protested. “I-”

“You what? You fought his decision to send you away, is that what you are going to claim? You were relieved, and don’t think I didn’t see it. Relieved to have an excuse to leave.”

Julian said nothing, keeping his eyes fixed on the stone wall behind her.

“You have been away for so long. You have so much power, you could have sent for me before.”

“We are in the middle of a war-”

“You _knew _how she treated me. How could you not send for me the moment you heard of Father’s passing?”

He looked at her again, an edge of desperation making its way into his voice. “I couldn’t risk it. She threatened to send you to a Chantry, I only wanted you to be free.”

“I believed it at first, when Cullen told me. He’s defended you all along, painted you as the hero. But I’ve seen now how things work around here. I understand the reach of your will, brother. You could have arranged for me to be taken to you without dear old mommy being able to do anything about it. But you didn’t want to risk, what, your good relations with the Free Marches? Our family name? But you forced your commander; your best friend, to marry a woman he’d never met? So that you could get me here quietly. Is there no end to your selfishness?”

“Nalide, that is unfair. Your well being is the most important thing in the world to me.”

“Good. Then you undo this, send for a healer and help Cullen.” She dropped to her knees again and cradled Cullen’s face in her hands, watching him longingly. “Then we can talk about this.”

“Talk about _what?_” Julian’s voice was cold as ice again. “About how he has defiled you? How he had the fucking nerve to lie straight to my face when I walked in on you that night? He should rot in the Fade for what he has done.”

Nalide felt her blood flare when he spoke of Cullen so harshly, but she kept calm and continued to look at Cullen’s still face while she gently wiped a bit of blood off his mouth. “He hasn’t _defiled_ me. You speak as if he has violated me, as if he has taken something I did not want to give willingly. He has _not. _I saw him, and he saw me, it is as simple as that. It was all it took. He tried to resist at first, but no matter how long he would have held out, it would have been pointless. We are blessed by Andraste, despite what you may think. There could be no other way. I am meant for him.” She leaned down and let her cheek rest against Cullen’s, ignoring the blood that smeared across her chin.

She gasped when her arm was grabbed and Julian yanked her up from the ground.

“Have you gone insane?” he growled at her, still gripping her hard. She didn’t respond as she saw movement behind Julian.

It was the red-head and a few of what Nalide assumed were her men.

Julian turned his head and let go of Nalide when he saw Leliana. The woman took in the scene before her quickly before turning her head to her men. “Take him to a healer, and do it quietly.” She looked at Julian and Nalide. “You two, come with me before people see you and start talking even more than those who already have.”

Julian paled.

“What, you think assaulting your own commander in the garden would go unnoticed?” Leliana said, eyebrow raised. “Luckily for you, I’ve managed to contain it for now. Now move.”

Nalide watched the men carry Cullen away and made to follow them, but Leliana stepped into her path. “No, my Lady. You are coming with me, too.”

Minutes later, the three of them were in the privacy of the top of Leliana’s tower of ravens. Nalide was looking out the window, saying nothing, and Leliana perched herself on top of her desk with Julian standing in front of her.

“Out with it, then. What in the Maker’s name were you thinking?” she demanded of Julian.

“He’s been fucking her.”

Nalide bit the inside of her cheek as she heard her brother’s crude words behind her, but still she said nothing.

“Oh. I see.”

“You don’t sound surprised.”

Leliana shrugged. “He adores the girl. He’s kept her safe while you have been away, Julian.”

“Like that makes it fucking okay,” Julian snarled. Nalide turned to look at him and shrank away a little from the sight. He looked livid, and it was not pleasant to be the recipient of his fury. “All this talk about keeping her safe – he is twice her age, he is her stepfather for Andraste’s sake! She calls him father, he calls her daughter. It’s not fucking right.”

“You insisted on it, brother,” Nalide said, steeled against his wrath; furious at his hypocrisy. “You pushed us together, urged us to spend time together, you said over and over how he would keep me safe from everyone, that he was to be trusted and how much he had helped our family. And you didn’t even tell me that you had forced him into it, that he had married someone he didn’t want because of _me_.”

Julian stared at her. “So you’re saying you felt guilty? That’s why-”

“_No. _But everything you told me about him is true. He is more than worthy of my love.”

Something dark came over Julian’s face and he stepped closer to her. “Do you think you’re the first girl who has crossed his path, sister? That yours are the first skirts he’s yanked up and done with what he pleased? He has been a Templar for as long as you have been alive. He has been my best friend for a long time now, you think he hasn’t confided in me what he’s done to countless helpless little mage girls in those towers? Do you have any idea how many women have thrown themselves at his feet since he joined the Inquisition? You are far from the first, and you won’t be his last.”

Nalide looked utterly unfazed. “I am not a stupid child, brother. Of course he’s had women before me. But don’t try to paint him out like some villain. I know _you_, and that’s all it takes. Because he has your respect, or had, at least. He may have had his fill of pleasure as a Templar, but if he had been some sort of power hungry rapist, you would never have had him by your side, much less called him your friend.”

“Your sister is a bright one,” Leliana remarked, but Julian only stared daggers at the woman before turning back to his sister.

“None of it matters now, not after what he has done. You’re going back to Ostwick.”

“What?” Nalide’s eyes went wide. “You can’t!”

“Yes I can, and that is final. Or so help me, I will tell Lyria everything.”

Nalide’s eyes filled with fear. “You wouldn’t.”

“I absolutely fucking would. Anything to keep him away from you. You will go tomorrow, and while you’re home, Lyria will find you a husband.”

“You—you would marry me off to some unknown man rather than let me be happy with him?”

“Cullen is not a fucking _option_. Even if I would let you near him again, which I _never _fucking will, he is married to Mother, what is it that you don’t understand? You don’t love him, you are too young to-”

“But not too young to marry a stranger? One who gets to fuck me whether I want to or not?”

Julian flinched at his sister’s words.

“Julian-” Leliana started but he shot her a warning look.

“What I say is final. You will go tomorrow. I will tell Lyria that the situation here is no longer safe, and that Cullen has left on urgent business. You will go quietly and you will do as I say, and I might let Cullen stay with the Inquisition for as long as he is useful.”

“Please.” Nalide’s voice was quiet. “Please let me see him before I leave.”

“Absolutely not. If I had my way, you would never see him again. At least not until after you are married.”

Leliana didn’t look pleased but she took Nalide’s arm. “Come, girl. There is no talking him out of this, let us go to your room and-”

Nalide shrugged her off. “I’ll go. And I’ll go quietly, for Cullen’s sake.” She walked towards the stairs but stopped as she was level to her brother. She turned her head and looked him right in the eyes. “I will never, ever forgive you for this.” Her words dripped with venom and Julian looked momentarily unsure of himself, before his face settled in angry determination once again. Nalide spat at his feet before starting her descent.

* * *

_ **Months later** _

The mood in the war room was as tense as ever when Cullen stepped inside the door. His companions were already standing around the table and Cassandra scrutinized him hard as he took his normal spot to the one side. The Inquisitor hadn’t arrived yet.

Silence.

“Cullen,” Cassandra’s voice rang out. “I’m just going to come right out and ask you. Are you using lyrium again?”

He raised his eyebrows in surprise. “No, I am not. Why do you ask?”

“Well, just look at you. You are hollow-eyed, your hair is a mess, you have a _beard, _for Andraste’s sake! You look like you haven’t slept for weeks.”

Cullen just scoffed and looked down on the plans on the table.

“And this endless squabbling between you and Julian. You used to get along about everything. Now you disagree and argue about every little detail. Something is going on.”

Cullen looked up and saw that Josephine nodded as well, agreeing with Cassandra. His eyes shifted to Leliana, who was standing with her arms crossed over her chest, looking hard as usual.

“You might as well tell them, then,” he grunted.

“Tell us what?” Josephine’s eyebrows were raised suspiciously.

Leliana unfolded her arms and gestured towards him. “He is hopelessly in love with Nalide Trevelyan,” she stated flatly.

Josephine’s face was that of dawning understanding, but Cassandra looked shocked.

“Julian’s little sister?”

“What about my little sister?” Steps echoed against the stone as Julian walked into the room and shut the door behind him. He looked at Cassandra. “Well?”

“They were starting to wonder -” Leliana cut in, “- why our commander looks like he’s a walking corpse.”

Cullen snorted. He didn’t look _that_ bad.

“So I told them,” she stated without a trace of shame.

“That’s just great.” Julian looked as sour as ever.

“But – but you are married to her mother!” Cassandra exclaimed.

“Finally, someone who sees this madness for what it is,” Julian muttered.

“Well, I’m not surprised.”

They all turned to look at Josephine, Julian very sharply.

“What? That girl is a delight. And she is what, seventeen? You dangle the most handsome man in the Inquisition – except for her brother, of course, Julian – in front of her, making him some sort of protector to her, and expect her not to fall head over heels for him? She might be intelligent for her age, but what woman would be able to resist?”

Cullen might have blushed if he hadn’t been so damned tired. Too tired to care for flattery, be it true or not.

“I’m not _interested _in discussing my sister’s, or _his, _folly,” Julian bit back.

Cassandra seemed to have composed herself again. “It doesn’t matter. What matters is that we are about to march on the Arbor Wilds, you two cannot be squabbling like children over this or anything else. Remember what we are here for. Remember your Maker-damned duty, the both of you!”

Cullen bit his tongue, disregarding his desire to protest against being scolded. She was right, and even Julian nodded his agreement. After that, there wasn’t any more time to think of anything but the battles ahead.

* * *

He knew she would come. Cullen knew, and yet there was nothing he could do to prepare himself. He didn’t know how he would react when he saw her. He was just going to have to control himself as best he could.

However good that would be when more than half a year had passed since he’d laid eyes on her.

When he’d first woken up after Julian had knocked him out cold, and found out that the man he had once called his best friend had _taken _her from him, he had been at a loss for what to do. He had never imagined that he would send her away, not in a million years. She was simply gone. When he heard that Julian planned to marry her off, however, he _had _known what to do. He’d marched into Julian’s quarters and punched him straight in the face, Leliana right behind him yelling for him to stop. Julian had been too surprised to answer the blow and Cullen had hit him again and again and again. When Leliana finally managed to rip him off Julian, he almost hit her too. He had screamed at her, asking why she had told him about the marriage plans for Nalide. What had she expected him to do? After he’d walked away, no one had spoken about it again.

He couldn’t sleep, he could barely eat. All he could think of was her, alone with his cursed wife, being treated Maker knew how. And about to be betrothed against her will. And there was absolutely nothing he could do about it. He could feel it eat him from the inside out, breaking him slowly like he had only ever experienced one other time in his life.

He hated Julian for it. He hated him. But still, his absolute sense of duty prevailed. The Inquisition must come first.

So when he stood on the rise overlooking the Skyhold courtyard, where he had watched Julian return in triumph a few weeks before, but this time waiting for his wife to arrive among countless others to join in the celebrations over Corypheus’ defeat, he didn’t know what to think anymore. The war was over. If he was not Commander of the Inquisition’s military forces, he didn’t know what place he would have in the world anymore. But it didn’t matter. What mattered was that he didn’t owe Julian his allegiance any longer.

There was only one important thing in his life, and she was arriving at that very moment, accompanied by her mother – and her betrothed.

When they all stepped out of the carriage, it was nothing like when he had seen her for the first time all those months ago.

He watched his wife first, his mouth full of distaste despite her obvious beauty. Then came some man he didn’t know, stepping out and holding out his hand for the one person left inside the carriage.

He was surprised that he didn’t care about the man whatsoever. His eyes were fixed on the girl taking the man’s hand.

She looked incredible. Of course she did. She had on a rich, deep green dress and a gray cloak over her shoulders to protect her from the fall wind. Her blonde hair flowed freely around her shoulders, a few small braids of it pinned with white flowers to frame her beautiful face.

He thought he had remembered what she looked like, that he had every line of her committed to his memory. But his mind could not do her justice. He felt as if someone had punched all the air out of his lungs and he had to dig his nails into the palms of his hands and use every last scrap of discipline to not walk up to her and take what he wanted with no regards to anyone around them.

He had hoped to stay out of their sight on the rise for a little while longer while he tried to compose himself but Nalide’s eyes found him immediately, looking up at him as if she could feel him watching her. She stared at him for too long, struggling just as him, and Lyria followed her line of sight until she saw him too. She smiled at him and waved in greeting and he had no choice but to descend.

Thankfully, Julian was busy elsewhere at the moment, probably entertaining a throng of nobles who had come to hear his tale of brave victory. Cullen was thankful his knowing eyes were not around to scrutinize him.

Cullen didn’t know how he managed to keep his calm as he leaned down to kiss his wife on the cheek, saying something about how he had missed her as well in response to whatever she said.

He didn’t hear the name of the man he was then introduced to, his heart was beating too loudly in his chest. He nodded at the man quickly before he turned to Nalide, biting the insides of his cheeks so hard that he could taste blood.

She couldn’t be real. She looked like something out of a fairy-tale, green and fair like a woodland sprite. She didn’t look happy, her eyes were blue pools of agony that only he could see. But all the same, she stepped forward and embraced him.

“Father,” she mumbled while he pulled her against him. He only let himself breathe her in for a second before letting her go, before his self-control would shatter.

“You must all be tired,” he said and motioned for a servant to approach. “Take them all to their quarters.”

“Mother, Savir, it’s been so long since I had a chance to speak to Father. Would you allow me an hour or two with him to walk the grounds and catch up? I would like to go see Julian as well.”

Cullen felt like he was waking up from a dream as she spoke. He looked the man she called Savir over. He seemed normal enough, neither handsome nor unfortunate looking. He was about a head shorter than Cullen, but so were most men. Cullen noticed with some scorn that he looked almost older than himself. So much for the horror of him being twice Nalide’s age. He thought nothing of this Savir until the man grabbed Nalide’s hand and placed his lips on top of it.

“Do what you wish, my love. I’ll help your mother get settled in the meantime.”

Cullen didn’t hear what Lyria said, he had to focus on not ripping the man’s throat out right in front of them.

The blood pounding in his ears stilled somewhat as his wife and the man walked away with the servant in tow, and he felt Nalide’s arm slip around his. He turned to look down at her, thankful that there were too many people milling around for anyone to really notice them.

“Take me somewhere quiet,” she said, her lips slightly parted as she stared up at him.

“Your brother will know. He’ll hear of it, he has eyes everywhere.”

“I don’t give a fuck about my brother.” She looked full of contempt as she said it. “Do you?”

“_No_.”

He tried to walk slowly so that no one would look at them while he tried desperately to think of someplace they would be undisturbed. The food cellars were no options, there was too much traffic in and out of there now. His office was not to think about either. Perhaps…

“Nalide,” he said so low that only she could hear. “The only place I can take you where we can lock a door behind us is the dungeon, I don’t -”

“Do it.” She paused for a moment before continuing. “It’s where you almost killed that boy for me. It'll do. I have waited for more than half a _year. _I won’t wait another second.”

Cullen couldn’t help himself, he hurried his steps, ushering them towards the dungeon faster and faster. His blood was churning in anticipation and he could barely see where he was going.

When they finally arrived, he cursed when he saw that the back part of the dungeon he’d had in mind wasn’t empty. A man was sitting in one of the cells. He rose and put his hands around the bars and watched them as Cullen swore.

“We can’t, he can tell anyone about this,” Cullen said through gritted teeth.

Nalide regarded the prisoner, some thought or another clearly working together behind her blue eyes. “What is he here for?” she asked softly.

“No one is down this part except for traitors and murderers.”

“So kill him, then. Before, after, it doesn’t matter to me.”

Cullen’s eyes shot to her face. He had known she could be cold of heart to those who deserved it, but to state it so blatantly-

She put her hand up to his face. “Nothing, no one else matters but you and me,” she whispered as she caressed him. “Especially not a traitor, a lowlife who has threatened the Inquisition. That means he’s threatened _you_. Cut his throat and be done with it, I can’t wait any longer,” she pleaded while guiding his hands down her neck and deeper still.

Cullen growled and reluctantly let her go. He walked up to the prisoner who had heard nothing of their hushed voices, and motioned for him to lean even closer.

“I’ll set you free,” Cullen said coldly and then plunged his knife between the bars into the man’s throat. A look of surprise went over his features and Cullen pulled the knife out, splattering himself with blood as he did so. He didn’t even wait for the man to fall to the floor before he turned around and walked rapidly up to Nalide.

“You are covered in blood,” she stated, and she smeared some of it off his brow, before she yanked him to her and he was kissing her with the starvation of a dying man.

It was violent, but it still wasn’t close enough. He pushed her against the wall, ignoring the grime that was smearing across the back of her dress, his groin pulsating with hunger; desperation to feel her around his cock. He was burning up, and her moans told him she was feeling exactly the same. She tore her underwear off herself while he unlined his trousers and pulled her dress up, leaving bloody marks everywhere he touched her skin. Her fingers dug into his skin hard enough to draw blood and he relished it, throwing his head back in a groan when she wrapped her fingers around his huge cock.

“I’ve missed you so much, daddy,” she whispered and he lost it. He thrust himself into her and it was nothing like what he remembered. It was a thousand times more.

“Andraste, you are so wet for me, my sweet,” he panted and she let out a drawn out moan as he began fucking her harder and harder against the stone.

His heart almost jumped out of its chest when they heard loud pounding on the door but Nalide angled his face so that his forehead pressed into hers.

“Don’t you dare fucking stop. I don’t care if that is my brother out there with a whole army, nothing will stop this. _This_,” she panted and positioned herself so that he hit her even deeper, “is the will of Andraste.” He obeyed, ignoring the pounding and the shouts outside while he drove himself into her relentlessly.

There was only her. And just like she had asked him to kill the man who was now dead only feet away from them, he would do it again if she asked. Anyone she wished would die so that Andraste's will may be done.


	7. Chapter 7

He was in a trance, staring at her face while he drove himself into her, not even hearing the pounding on the door next to them anymore. The gloom of the dungeon and the damp air, the grime from the wall that was smearing itself onto the back of Nalide’s dress a little more with each thrust – he was oblivious to it all. How could he notice any of it when the object of his unstoppable obsession was letting out small moans of pleasure between her whispered prayers? When the girl he had dreamed of endlessly was there in the flesh, with him inside of her, making him feel things that even his memories hadn’t done justice?

She convulsed around him, the breath of her whispers brushing his ear and making the hairs on his neck stand up and he groaned as he released himself into her.

They both tried to catch their breaths while he slowly became aware again of the sound of someone trying to break the door in. He kissed Nalide’s forehead.

“Stay here,” he commanded and he brushed himself off while gritting his teeth, making himself ready for the chaos that was surely going to ensue once he opened that door.

But when he finally did, it wasn’t Julian standing on the other side as he had expected. It was one of his own guard-captains, who looked shocked to see his commander. Two confused looking soldiers stood behind him.

“What?” Cullen demanded, masking his relief over the fact that it wasn’t the Inquisitor.

“I’m sorry, Commander, I didn’t know it was you in here. I had reports of someone creeping into the dungeon, we feared it might be some sort of attempt to break the prisoner free, I-”

The man stopped talking when he saw Nalide behind Cullen’s shoulder, and when he looked back at Cullen, he seemed to take in his disheveled, bloody appearance.

“Maker, what happened here?”

Cullen stood aside to let the men in, shooting Nalide a warning glance to stay in the background. She did, keeping her eyes down.

The captain’s eyes fell to the dead prisoner on the floor of the cell.

“My daughter is a gentle soul,” Cullen began explaining while the men stared at the dead body. “When she heard that there was a man down here awaiting his execution, she wanted to come and pray with him, not even caring about resting first after her long journey here. I’m afraid the prisoner wasn’t as kind as her. He grabbed her when she got too close to the bars, tried to threaten her. I’m sure you understand my reaction.” The lie floated effortlessly from Cullen’s lips and the soldiers began unlocking the cell door to clear the body out while the captain turned to Cullen and Nalide, who was now nestled against her stepfather’s shoulder, playing the part of shocked innocence perfectly.

“I hope it didn’t frighten you too much, my lady,” the captain said gently. “Good thing your father was here. Perhaps let it be a lesson to you, my lady, if I may be so bold. Men like these do not deserve your sympathies.”

Cullen squeezed her shoulder. “Indeed. Sorry for the mess, gentlemen. It would be much appreciated if you cleaned this up, and I would ask for your discretion. No need to let the Inquisitor know about this, I wouldn’t want him to worry about his little sister for nothing. I’ll take care of her now.”

The captain nodded. “Of course, Commander.”

Cullen led Nalide out of the room and stopped right before the exit from the dungeon. He pressed a kiss against her forehead. There were guards around but it was a perfectly acceptable thing for a father to show such a demure display of affection.

“Go and get yourself cleaned up, love,” he said with a voice low enough so that only she could hear. “If anyone takes notice of your state, just say you fell outside. It’s muddy everywhere, it wouldn’t be hard to believe.”

Nalide nodded. “When will I see you again, Cullen?”

She looked up at him and despite the gloom, he could see how her eyes sparkled and it was all he could do not to lean down and kiss her. “It will be dark outside soon, dinner time is not far away. I expect I’ll be attending with you and your mother.”

“And Savir,” Nalide said, cautious.

Cullen only grunted in response to that. “I’ll see you soon.”

She walked out the door he held open for her.

* * *

Nalide didn’t want to go to her quarters. She didn’t want to return to reality – a reality so far away from what she truly wanted. Only her nightmare of a stepmother and her boring betrothed awaited her there. She dragged her steps, wanting nothing more than to follow Cullen instead. She shivered all over as she thought of his broad frame dwarfing her when he’d had her against the wall. How he had looked at her…

She hadn’t known what to expect when she had arrived. She had heard nothing from him for over six months. She knew he had no choice, but still. What if he had decided she wasn’t worth the trouble? But all such childish fears had disappeared from her mind the moment she had stepped out of the carriage and seen the way he had looked at her. Like he couldn’t even see anything else. How the others didn’t notice was beyond her. As soon as he had come close enough for her to see how his eyes were burning, she had become desperate to feel him. She didn’t even know how she had managed to calmly request that she might be allowed to spend an hour or two with him. She had barely heard her mother’s response, her own blood pounding in her ears as Cullen lead her away and down towards the dungeon with faster and faster steps.

When he had killed that prisoner, the moment before he descended on her, she thought she must surely be dreaming. He stood over her, half his face splattered in blood he had spilled for her, so tall and so big, his messy blonde hair perfect and his lips slightly parted from breathing fast, his scar running deliciously over his lip -

She had thanked Andraste over and over in her head before he was on her and every coherent thought went flying out of her head. He swallowed up her whole world.

That she was forced to part from him now seemed like an affront to the Maker, but before she could figure out what to do, all that mattered was keeping Cullen safe. And if playing the dutiful daughter did that, so be it.

* * *

It was already dark when Cullen left his tower after cleaning himself up. He would go to his wife’s guest quarters and dine with her, along with their daughter and her betrothed. He sneered at the thought of the man, a man he had certainly not approved although he had explicitly told Lyria not to make any matches without his consent. But the war had gotten in the way and it would have been considered very strange for Nalide not to marry soon. But he would put a stop to it, somehow. There was no way in the deepest, darkest corner of the Fade he would let her marry anyone, especially not a man who looked to be in his forties.

His thoughts were interrupted when he heard noises coming out of the darkness. He was close to the small chantry that was housed in the keep and he crept nearer to investigate. The door to the small chapel was slightly open and he could hear a harsh whipping sound and someone mumbling and – crying out?

He peered inside and was horrified to see that it was Nalide, on her knees before the statue of Andraste, with Lyria holding her in what looked like a painful grip by the hair, whipping the back of the girl’s bare legs with a stick.

“You stupid, filthy little whore!” Lyria snarled at her while she whipped the stick across Nalide’s back leg. From the look of the angry, red welts all but covering both of Nalide’s calves, they had been at this for some time. Cullen slammed the door open and Lyria snapped her head around to look at him, still holding Nalide by the hair.

“What on the Maker’s green earth is going on here?” Cullen demanded, fury threatening to spill over at any moment.

Nalide could barely angle herself to look at him while Lyria had her in her grip, but she tried. He could see that she had tried to be strong, probably taking Lyria’s punishment – whatever it was for – as silently and dignified as she could, but there were tears running down her cheeks all the same. “Cullen,” she breathed but Lyria let go of the stick and slapped her across the cheek so hard that her head flew to the side.

“Shut your dirty mouth in your father’s presence,” Lyria spat and before Cullen had time to stalk up to her and rip her off Nalide, she addressed him.

“I caught her trying to sneak into her room before. Thought I wouldn’t be able to fucking _smell _on her what she had done. She hasn’t even been back here for _one _day before she spreads her legs like the disgusting, little slut she is.”

Cullen froze. Did she know it was him?

“What if Savir had seen her? Smelled another man on her? She would have humiliated me for the rest of my days, and you as well, husband! And now the little terror simply refuses to tell me who it is she has been seeing.”

Cullen’s thoughts were turning over fast and he saw only one way out of this. Something that would save Nalide from further humiliation from Lyria and reassert his authority as the head of the family, something Lyria had conveniently forgotten when deciding who Nalide would marry.

He steeled himself and then he looked down at Nalide with contempt in his eyes.

“Leave me with her,” he commanded Lyria without looking at her. His voice was dark, harsh.

“What? I-”

He took a few steps closer to Nalide and pried her out of Lyria’s grip. He yanked her up to him. “I’ll teach her not to drag my name into the mud like some common street whore.”

He glanced at Lyria who’s eyes were shining with approval of his harsh treatment. “What will you-”

“That is none of your concern,” he interrupted her, his voice cold and unemotional. “Leave and shut the door behind you, and make sure no one disturbs us.”

Lyria nodded like she was excited, but when she turned to leave, Cullen gripped her arm and whirled her around to face him. “Don’t come in here, no matter what you hear.”

“I won’t. The little witch deserves everything she has coming.” She smiled at her husband before slinking out the door and shutting it behind her, just like he had ordered.

Cullen immediately loosened his grip on Nalide and stroked her cheek lovingly. “Are you alright, sweetheart?” he murmured and kissed her lips gently.

“I’m fine,” she said as they pulled back from each other. “A little sore, maybe, but I’ll be okay.”

Cullen looked down and pulled the bottom of her dress up so that he could inspect her legs. “That looks bad, love,” he murmured but Nalide shook her head.

“You stopped her before she could go too far. I’m grateful,” she said and kissed him again. “But what now? She thinks you’ll hurt me.”

“Do you feel up to putting on a little show for her? She’ll hear but she won’t see.”

She looked at him with a raised eyebrow when the corner of his mouth curved upward wickedly.

“I’m up for anything you want,” she said and smiled back.

“Get on your knees,” he boomed, loud enough for his voice to drift out to the other side of the door.

Nalide did as he asked, delight glinting in her eyes before she turned her head from him and got on all fours on the floor. Cullen unclasped his cloak and bent down next to her and placed it underneath her. “Careful with your knees, love,” he mumbled and stroked the skin of her thighs beneath her pulled up dress. He caught her ear lobe between his teeth and sucked and she gave out a breathless, low moan. “I will do something to you that will be loud. You’ll be loud. It will sound to your mother like you’re in pain, and perhaps you will be a little bit, but I will make you feel incredibly good at the same time, little dove. Alright?” He spoke low enough for only Nalide to hear.

“You’re going to make her listen to you fucking me?” Nalide sounded elated.

“Yes, but she won’t know that. Can you do your part?”

Nalide grabbed his hand and guided it down to the hem of her dress and with her fingers intertwined with his, she made him pull it up, leaving it bunched around her waist. She was still on all fours and he could see from behind how her cunt was already glistening with wetness. Cullen felt his cock strain painfully against the fabric of his trousers, his heart beating; slamming against his chest in anticipation for what he was about to do. He grabbed her hips and she immediately cried out.

“Father, please, it hurts!” She was loud; perfect. She looked back at him and bit her lip, her eyes hazed over and begging him to do his worst.

He smacked her ass hard and she cried out.

“I’m going to teach you that I won’t tolerate any filthy whoring in this family,” he growled and smacked her again.

“Daddy, _please-_”

“Shut your mouth,” he snarled and shoved two fingers into her tight cunt, making her breath catch in her throat. He freed himself from his trousers with his other hand and placed himself against her entrance, coating himself in her wetness. When he withdrew without entering her, she mewled in protest. He grabbed her chin and angled her face towards him. “Don’t worry baby, daddy will be inside of you real soon. This may hurt a little. Make sure that bitch out there hears it,” he whispered and let go of her face. He spat down on her ass, his saliva running down it slowly. He smeared it out with his finger; already wet from her juices, and he slipped a finger into her asshole. Nalide whimpered but it wasn’t loud enough. He had to be rougher with her to achieve the intended effect. He withdrew his finger and placed his cock against her ass instead. He was good and coated, and he started to ease himself into her, bit by bit. Nalide cried out louder and louder with every inch he pushed into her. He had to restrain himself from losing himself completely, the immense sense of pleasure from her tightness around him threatening to drive him insane.

He thrust himself all the way into her and Nalide was being a good, little girl for him, sobbing for him to stop.

“Please, Father, it hurts, please stop it, I’ll do anything, I’ll be good, I swear!” She was perfect.

“You’re fucking right you will be, you dirty little fucking whore,” he snarled loudly and then he started to pull out of her, almost all the way, until he bucked into her again. She sobbed and protested at first, and his restraint was near non-existent. What she did to him, how she felt around him… He wanted to fuck her even harder, right down into the hard, stone floor. He could hear how her pained moaning started to turn into pleasure and he put a hand over her mouth, never stopping his movement. She squeezed around him so fucking deliciously and he pushed her down, forcing her knees to give way under her so that she was laying flat on the floor. He bit his lip hard when it made his cock get even deeper inside her ass. His face was right above her head, and he licked her ear, still holding his hand over her mouth.

“You feel so fucking good,” he groaned as quietly as he could.

She buffed his hand away from her mouth. “I’m going to come, daddy, I can’t stop it.” Her voice was nothing but a strangled whisper as she tried to keep control over her voice.

“Scream for me, princess, daddy’s going to help you,” he grunted and he picked up his pace, fucking her harder and faster and oh, how she screamed as she let her orgasm wash over her. Her moans sounded pained and she begged him yet again to stop. Even though he was fucking her ass and not her cunt, he could feel her convulsing all over and he let himself go deep inside of her ass, biting himself so hard his lip started to bleed as he kept his roar of pleasure buried.

He gave neither of them any time to recover, instead he stood up and pulled her up against him and kissed her quickly on the forehead while tying the lining to his trousers and throwing his cloak over his shoulders.

“Keep your eyes down, and keep those tears from before coming, princess,” he whispered to her and dragged her towards the door before throwing it open.

Lyria was standing outside with a shocked look at her face as she eyed Cullen’s sweaty appearance and the way he was holding the sobbing Nalide’s arm in a painful grip.

“You apologize to your mother, right this instant, young lady,” he commanded.

Nalide kept her eyes to the ground but did as he asked, desperation in her voice. “I’m very sorry, Mother, I’ll never do it again, I swear.”

“Damn right you won’t,” Cullen snarled and looked at Lyria. “Since you obviously can’t keep well enough track of our daughter, I’ll be watching her more closely from now on. She will be spending more time with me. If she can’t control herself, at least I will put the fear of the Maker into anyone so much as looking at her funny. She can’t whore herself out if no one dares to go near her.”

Lyria nodded, accepting his scolding of her mothering without comment. “Savir will expect to spend time with her, and lots of it,” she remarked while she watched her daughter with cold disregard, as if the severe beating she thought Cullen had put her through didn’t faze her whatsoever.

“_I _will spend time with him too, to see who this man is who you have chosen to marry our daughter to, and if he’s fit for it.”

Lyria’s eyes widened. “You can’t break their betrothal, it would cause a scandal, I-”

“I’m the head of this fucking family,” Cullen roared and Lyria cast her eyes down. Nalide started to sob again, a perfect reminder to her mother what could happen if he was disobeyed. “Now, go to your quarters, I will take Nalide to mine and get her cleaned up. No one can see her like this. I’ll return her to you tomorrow, were we will all sit down and have a nice, family lunch together. And bring this Savir, too,” Cullen spat.

Lyria nodded and quickly scurried away, seemingly eager to get away from him.

As soon as they were sure she was out of sight, Nalide quieted her sobbing and she looked up at Cullen and smiled. “That was _perfect,_” she sighed and Cullen grinned wickedly at her before reaching down to kiss her hard.

“I hope it wasn’t too much,” he mumbled against her lips as they broke the kiss, and he stroked her hair lovingly.

“I can never have too much of you, _Father,_” she quipped playfully and he smiled at her again.

“Come on, you little vixen. Let’s get you to my room.”

* * *

Nalide was more than excited as Cullen led her by the hand toward his tower. He had actually managed to spin this all their way perfectly. She watched his back as he led them on, marveling at how perfect he was. And what he had done to her in the Chantry, before Andraste herself… If she wasn’t too sore, she would be begging him to do it again before the night was over.

They arrived in his office and he shut the door behind them. She stood leaning against his desk, waiting for him while he rumbled through the shelves, looking for something. He finally grabbed a pouch and walked up to her. He gave her a small smile.

“Turn around, my sweet, I want to take a look at those welts on your legs. I think a few of them started bleeding.” His voice and his hands were gentle as he knelt in front of her while she turned around. She leaned over the desk and he bunched up her dress to take a look at her legs. She heard him fiddling with the pouch and he touched her with something greasy. She drew in a sharp breath.

“It stings,” she hissed but it wasn’t too bad.

“I know, love, I’m sorry, but it will make it better. It’s a salve made of elfroot, I’m just going to-”

Whatever he was about to say was interrupted by the door banging open. Nalide whipped her head around and she felt like someone had dropped a rock over her stomach when she saw her brother in the doorway, looking as outraged as the last time she had seen him.

“I fucking knew it. Couldn’t keep your hands off her for even a day, huh?” Julian didn’t even look at her, only at Cullen.

Cullen stood up and let Nalide’s dress fall down again. “Oh, keep it in your pants, Julian. I’m only helping her.”

“You-” Julian started but Nalide interrupted him.

“He’s telling the truth, Julian,” she said and lifted her dress up a bit, showing him her legs. “Courtesy of dear, old Mother,” she scoffed and regarded her brother with cold disdain as surprise flashed across his face. “What, you think this is unusual? Is that what you’ve been telling yourself, that I’m living like a princess under her roof?”

“I- What did you do?”

“Oh, go rot in the Fade, you insufferable fool!” she cried and threw her hands out in exasperation. “She went off again, as usual. There needs to be no reason in particular. It would have been a lot worse if Cullen hadn’t stopped her.”

Julian looked unsure of himself, looking between his sister and Cullen, who stood with his arms crossed next to Nalide.

“You should leave,” Cullen said, his voice dangerously calm.

“There is now way I’m leaving you alone with her-”

“You have no fucking say,” Cullen interrupted. “I’m her family now, apparently the only one who can keep her safe. She is being beaten by your mother and she is betrothed to someone who really _is _old enough to be her father, someone Lyria has picked out for her. Do you think he is a good man?”

Nalide cut in before Julian had a chance to reply. “Savir is forty-three years old, brother. Ten years Cullen’s senior, who you were oh so upset about being that much older than me. He’s widowed twice and has two children already, a little girl and another that is _one _year my junior. You are such a fucking hypocrite.”

“I didn’t know that,” Julian admitted.

“You didn’t fucking care, as long as you got her away from me,” Cullen said. “But things are going to change now. She is going to stay here with me.”

“You can’t be serious!”

“Whether we stay here in Skyhold or go back to Ostwick, there is nothing you can do about it. And don’t you come here telling us you will tell Lyria about us. You needn’t cause anymore harm to your sister than you already have. Everything that has happened so far is because of _you._” Cullen pointed his finger at Julian accusingly. “And if you want to tell Lyria, go ahead. I’ll have her dropped off the nearest fucking cliff if you do and then I will be the only parent left to Nalide anyway.”

Julian’s mouth was open and he stared at Cullen as if he had lost his mind. “This isn’t you, Cullen. I have known you for a long time, you are an honorable man. You wouldn’t just kill your own wife.”

Cullen pulled Nalide into his shoulder, cradling her against him. “I would do anything, _anything_, to keep her safe and happy.”

“Which is more than I can say for you, brother,” Nalide said quietly. Julian looked at her and the sadness in her voice seemed to unsettle him. “I used to adore you, you know. You were my big brother, my hero. You are supposed to support me, but you threw me out, rather marrying me off to some unknown old man than to let me be here, to let me be with Cullen.”

“He is your stepfather, whether you like it or not,” Julian said, stubborn and unrelenting as he stared at Cullen with disgust.

“Oh, I _do _like it,” Nalide spat, too angry to care that she was provoking him.

“You’re sick,” Julian snarled and stepped closer to Cullen. “Do you hear what you have done to her?”

“It wouldn’t be sick if not for you!” Nalide said, voice tight with anger. “If you would have brought me here without all this deception, Cullen and I would have met and he would have made me his wife and _no one _would have thought it strange. The Inquisitor’s little sister and the Inquisition’s military commander, not to mention his best friend. We could have become a real family, without her, without my old _widow _of a future husband!” Tears were streaming down Nalide’s cheeks freely but her voice was still steady. “We could have had it all, and you know it, don’t you, Julian? Is that why you are so angry? Your actions have led you to lose both me and him, when it wouldn’t have to be this way at all.” She wiped away a few tears from her face. “Cullen is the only one who can protect me now, as he is head of the family and the only one who can keep Lyria in control. You would deny me his protection, now that you see what she has done?”

“Nalide, everything I have done I have done for you. You can say I should have done this or that, but I did the only thing I could back then. Lyria wanted something in exchange for not sending you away and I gave it to her, and so did Cullen, willingly! Have you forgotten that? And if protecting you was all he was doing now, I would be happy to let him. But I _know _that isn’t the truth.”

Nalide sighed, at a loss for what to do. He would never understand. “Please. Can you just leave?”

“I’ll leave when you go back to your own quarters, sister.”

Nalide wanted to scream, but Cullen came to her rescue, again. “I’ve already told Lyria that Nalide will be staying with me tonight, to save her the embarrassment of anyone seeing her daughter in the state that she fucking left her in. You want to go back there and explain why I’ve changed my mind? You want to leave your sister alone with the same person who did this?” Cullen yanked up Nalide’s skirts again.

Julian stared at his sister’s bare legs for a few seconds before turning his eyes away, his jaw clenched in anger. “I should have her fucking hands cut off for doing that to you,” he murmured, not quite meeting Nalide’s eyes.

“First smart thing you have said all night,” she said before sighing heavily. “Now, will you kindly take your Maker damned leave and let me rest?”

Julian stared at the door. “I’ll send a healer first thing tomorrow morning to fix that,” he said without looking at either of them. “And this conversation isn’t fucking over.” He left then, shutting the door behind him.

Nalide sighed again and snuggled tighter against Cullen’s wide chest, breathing in the warmth of him. Cullen said nothing, he just kept stroking her hair. She’d never felt so safe in all her life.

“I wish we could stay like this forever,” she mumbled after a few minutes. “I wish everyone knew I was yours, that no one would dare to lay a hand on me ever again in fear of what you might do to them. You are so strong,” she said, her voice drowsy as she began kissing his neck, enjoying how she could make such a big, powerful man shiver with just the touch of her lips. “Do you know how much it excites me, the way you hurt people for my sake? Do you know how wet it made me, when I watched you skewer that man’s throat with your blade, just because I asked you to?”

She took one of Cullen’s fingers into her mouth and sucked on it slowly, the way he started to breathe faster spurring her on even more. She let them stumble back against the desk and she gave out a small sound of delight when she felt how hard he was against her. She perched herself on the surface of the desk and wrapped her legs around him, pulling his face against hers.

“I want this – you – forever. As my husband, my father, it doesn’t matter to me. I want to see your face splattered in blood again when you fuck me, I want you to bless me with your cock inside me on front of Andraste, I want you to fuck me like the animal I know you keep locked up inside, every day for the rest of my life.” She gasped as he caught her lip between his teeth and bit, and she did the same to him, opening the cut he had inflicted on his own lip earlier. A trickle of his blood emerged from the cut and she lapped it up greedily, savoring the warm, metallic taste on her tongue.

“I will give you anything you want, love,” he panted between kisses while he desperately clawed her filthy dress off her. “I will fix this, all of it. That man who thinks he will have you,” he spat, “will never fucking touch you. No one else ever will.”

Nalide breathed hard and moaned when she felt his cock against her soaking cunt. “What about Mother?”

“Don’t you worry about that, little dove,” he whispered as he started to fuck her. He groaned and gripped her arms so hard it would surely leave bruises while she let her head fall back in pleasure. He bit her neck and still it wasn’t enough, never close enough. She raked her nails against his chest and he pushed in and out of her so hard she was sure the desk would break at any moment. “You don’t have to worry about a thing. I’ll make anyone who stands in our way go away. Just how you like it, princess.”


	8. Chapter 8

Cullen looked himself in the mirror, the early morning light filtering in and illuminating his face. He looked tired, worn out. No wonder, since Nalide had kept him up half the night. He caught sight of her in the mirror behind him, still asleep and sprawled out naked on top of the covers in bed and he smiled to himself. He stared at her for a few moments, admiring every curve of her, every inch of her soft skin. Tingles went down his spine as he remembered his hands feeling her soft flesh against him all night and he had to shake his head to clear it before returning to his own reflection. He splashed some water from the basin on his face and began shaving, leaving only a short stubble when he was finished. Nalide had run her fingers through his beard during the night, mumbling half asleep and smiling that she liked it, but he knew it had to go. He needed to look presentable, not like he had lived in the woods for the last year.

He hadn’t given a damn about his looks while Nalide had been away but she was back now, as was his wife and the whole game that went with it. He had to keep up appearances, and he looked a bit less tired groomed than before.

He was just toweling off his face when he heard a knock on the door to his office below. He got down from the loft and opened to find a servant outside, handing a package to him.

“From your lady wife, Commander.”

Cullen took the package and shut the door behind him again before opening it. It was a fresh dress for Nalide, sorely needed. Cullen looked up towards the loft and smiled as he started to ascend the ladder to wake her up.

* * *

“I don’t want to go,” she pouted.

Cullen snickered and pressed a quick kiss against her forehead. “You think those puppy eyes are going to work on me, young lady? Better get this over with, hmm? Maybe I can convince your mother that you should stay with me tonight as well.”

Nalide’s eyes glittered as she looked up at him, her back pressed against the wall next to the door and Cullen standing over her with his hands planted on the wall at either side of her head.

“Only if you’re a good girl, though," he mumbled and stared at her lips, which she was now busy biting.

It was dangerous, risking being seen with her like this. His looming over her and staring at her mouth wouldn’t exactly be seen as fatherly, but he couldn’t help it. They were about to walk into the dining hall where Nalide’s mother and her betrothed awaited, and all he could think about was pressing her harder against the wall, doing things to her that no one else should ever see.

Nalide grabbed a hold of his shirt and pulled him down to her, aligning her mouth with his ear. “I’ll only be a good girl if you kiss me senseless first,” she whispered and he could feel her tongue dart out and lick his ear.

“Maker, what is it that you do to me, girl?”

But he didn’t wait for her to answer. He kept his hands on the wall and kissed her so hard that the back of her head pressed into the stone as well. The sounds she made told him that she didn’t mind in the slightest.

“Be quiet,” he whispered and muffled her mouth with his again. Her breathing became harder, frantic as his tongue swirled against hers and he could swear he felt the heat coming off the skin of her bare arms. He kissed his way down her jaw, leaving her panting and her fingers digging into his sides.

He heard shuffling sounds from the other side of the door and he let go of her as quickly as humanly possible, moving to stand in front of her as the door opened; letting her smooth out her hair and wipe her mouth behind him without being seen.

“Oh, Lord Rutherford! I thought I heard someone out here.”

Cullen had to stop himself from wrinkling his nose at Savir, who had opened the door.

“Yes, I’m bringing Nalide here for lunch, just like I told Lyria yesterday.”

“Oh.” Savir made no move to let them in, peering behind Cullen’s shoulder to catch a glimpse of Nalide. “You stayed with Lord Rutherford last night? Not in your quarters?” he addressed her.

Nalide shrugged. “What of it? We were catching up and it became late. Father was kind and let me sleep in his bed.”

“Well, he is your _stepfather_, no? Don’t you think it is a bit unseemly?”

Cullen couldn’t believe his ears, or his eyes. Was _Savir _wrinkling his nose at Nalide? As he was even worthy of standing in her presence?

Before he had the chance to rip the man’s head off, Lyria came into view behind him. “Cullen! What are you all doing just standing here? Come in!”

Savir smiled sweetly at Lyria and stepped aside. Cullen’s jaw was tight and he had to take a deep breath and steel himself to move.

The small, private dining chamber had a table overflowing with food set up in the middle, and Cullen was surprised to see Julian sitting there. His former friend stood up and smiled at the new arrivals as if nothing of yesterday’s conversation had happened. He even pulled out a chair and gestured for Nalide to sit in it, which she did quietly. Cullen sat down next to Lyria and Savir next to Nalide, and Julian at the head of the table. Some servants poured wine into their glasses before slipping out of the room again.

“Finally, a nice, little family lunch,” Cullen said, smiling first at his wife and Nalide and then fixing his eyes on Savir.

“Indeed,” Julian agreed. “Such a pleasure to finally meet the man vying for my darling little sister’s favor.” He was staring at Savir as well.

“Well,” Savir coughed, “it’s actually a little more than that, we-”

“Tell me, Savir,” Julian interrupted him and Cullen noted from the look on the man’s face that he wasn’t used to being cut off. “You are from house Veylyn, right?”

Savir nodded. “I-”

Julian interrupted him again. “You must forgive me, old fellow, but I don’t remember ever hearing your first name. Your father I know, of course, still going strong as head of the family, yes? And his oldest son, Thomas, of course. And the next oldest, Riley. I’ve even heard of your beautiful sister Carniva. But not of you, I’m afraid.”

Julian plucked some grapes from the table and plopped them into his mouth, as if he hadn’t just severely insulted the man in front of him. Cullen watched with delight.

Savir, on the other hand, was spluttering and Lyria stared daggers at her stepson while Nalide looked between her brother and her betrothed with fascination.

“I admit, I am the fourth of my seven brothers, but that doesn’t mean I don’t do well for myself. I have my own branch in the family trading business, so I assure you that there is no need to worry about your sister’s well being.”

“For now, you mean,” Cullen said and took a sip of his wine.

Savir stared at him. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, what will happen when your father dies? I may not be as knowledgeable in Marcher politics as Julian, but your oldest brother Thomas will inherit everything, I suppose?”

“That is correct. But that doesn’t -”

“If your brother decides to make some changes to the business?” Cullen continued. “What then? What if you have a falling out? Brothers often do. If he kicks you out, do you have anything to fall back on, or will my daughter have to live like a commoner, then?”

“I- I never, I mean of _course _not, that’s not-”

“You have to understand his concern, surely, Savir?” Julian said. “It’s a concern I share. My little sister means the world to me.” He pinned Savir with a hard gaze, and the man’s spluttering stopped immediately. Cullen had seen that look on Julian’s face many times before and was more than thankful that it was pointed at what seemed like a common enemy. As much as Julian disapproved of Cullen and Nalide’s relationship, he knew there was nothing Julian despised more than blabbering cowards with nothing but empty words to back up their claims.

“Now, I know Mother has set you up for an eventual marriage, but you didn’t think that Nalide would be allowed to marry anyone without Cullen’s or my approval first, did you? Nalide is my last remaining unmarried sister, and whoever marries her will have the Inquisitor as his brother-in-law and the Inquisition’s military commander for a father-in-law. Now, I love my sister to death and she alone would be a prize in and of itself, but marrying into—if I may say so myself—one of the most powerful families in Thedas... Tell me, Savir, why we should consider you worthy. What do you bring to the table?”

Cullen’s mouth had all but fallen open as Julian’s little speech had progressed, and Nalide’s actually had. She was staring at her brother in wonder. Was he trying to redeem himself to her? Because it sure seemed to be working. Even Cullen felt some of his anger dissipate as Julian virtually teared Savir to shreds.

The first one to speak after that was Lyria. “Julian, Savir does not deserve such harsh judgment, I-”

Julian stood up. “Mother, Nalide, please, go take your lunch in the garden, it’s a lovely day outside. Cullen and I need to speak to Savir alone.”

Lyria opened her mouth to protest, but the look Julian gave her made her rethink. She nodded at Nalide. “Come on, girl,” she said sullenly. Cullen got up and pulled Nalide’s chair out for her and she stood up and threw them all a last, beyond curious glance before she followed her mother out of the room.

The quiet after they had left was profound.

Savir stood up as well. “Gentlemen, I assure you -”

“Oh, please, shut up,” Julian said, sounding irritated just having to say it. “Did you really think we were going to let you marry her?”

Savir seemed to muster up what little courage he had left. “Now, see here, it has already been arranged and announced, the wedding is taking place upon our return to Ostwick, and neither of you can stop it!” The last part was a bit shrill, and Cullen noticed with scorn that the man’s hands were shaking slightly. Julian shot Cullen a look and rolled his eyes and it was almost like old times. Cullen stepped closer to Savir.

“Nothing we can do to stop it, you say?” Cullen’s voice rumbled darkly and Savir took a small, involuntary step back.

“It’s too late! I- I’ve already had her.”

Cullen and Julian closed in on him from both sides, Cullen staring at him with murder in his eyes.

“And what exactly is that supposed to mean?” he asked quietly.

“Yes, what _is _that supposed to mean?” Julian said, his tone perfectly neutral but Cullen knew. He knew the danger of that tone.

“Now, gentlemen, don’t be upset. She gave herself to me willingly, said she couldn’t wait, a-and I just wanted to keep her happy, it wasn’t my idea!”

A few heartbeats of heavy silence followed before Julian broke it.

“So you’re saying that my precious little sister, the Commander’s darling stepdaughter, was so eager to give her flower away to you – _you_, a man more than twice her age and then some, who she would be forced to marry against her will – that you simply couldn’t refuse? You did her some sort of favor? Say, don’t you have a daughter her age? What would you say if I did the same to her?”

“That’s not the same, we are to be married anyway -”

“You most certainly are _not_,” Cullen snarled and grabbed a hold of Savir’s collar, holding him choke tight only inches away from his bared teeth.

“As if I would ever let my sister marry a filthy liar like you, who would drag her honor through the mud just to save his own, sorry backside,” Julian spat. “I should let Cullen rip your fucking eyes out and eat them for even thinking about spreading rumors like that around her. Because rumors must have been your intended weapon, yes? You couldn’t possibly think this would affect _our _view on Nalide, did you? This is the Dragon Age, not the Ancient. But for even fucking _trying _to turn us against her -”

Cullen tightened his hold around Savir’s neck and finished Julian’s sentence. “We should snap your pathetic, little neck.”

“No, please, I had no intention – _ugh – _please, don’t hurt me!”

Julian squinted his eyes at Savir. “Maker, is he _crying_?” he asked in disgust and Cullen let Savir go, shoving him away, leaving him holding his throat and gulping for air between his sobs.

“Shut him up, will you?” Julian said to Cullen and rolled his eyes again. “I can’t stand that sniveling.”

Cullen grabbed Savir and held him upright before landing a hard blow to his stomach. Savir hunched over and retched on the floor.

Julian and Cullen stared at him in disgust.

“Andraste, the thought that _you _might have been the one to marry my sister had the war not been over and we had intervened,” Julian spat and shuddered, “is too much to bear. Now, Cullen, will you kindly tell him what will happen next?”

Julian didn’t need to tell him twice. It was as if none of the animosity from what had happened with Nalide remained and Cullen knew exactly what Julian wanted, as he always had.

He dragged Savir up from the floor and made him stand in front of them. “You will return to Ostwick tomorrow, without Nalide, of course. You will travel by carriage and you will say you have fallen gravely ill and that you are in no condition to marry anyone. You can play this in your favor if you want to, saying that you didn’t want to burden such a young bride with an old man’s illness, especially when you are in no condition to give her any children of her own.”

“And if you so much as breathe a fucking _word _about Nalide’s supposed destroyed virtue, we will know exactly where it came from,” Julian said, “and we will hunt you to the ends of the continent for it and gut you like a fucking animal.”

Cullen slapped the slack-jawed Savir’s face so hard his face flew to the side. “Are you fucking listening to him? I’ll rip out your innards myself and I will feed them to your sweet daughters, do you understand?”

Savir nodded frantically.

“Say it,” Julian snarled.

“I understand, I swear! I will do exactly what you said, and I won’t say a bad word about her. Just, please, let me leave.”

Julian barked for one of the guards to enter the room.

“Escort this man back to his quarters and pack up his things. I’ve changed my mind, you don’t get until tomorrow. You’re leaving right away,” Julian said looking at Savir before turning his eyes back to the guard. “See to it that it happens sooner rather than later. This man is no longer welcome here.”

“Yes, Your Worship.”

The guard all but dragged Savir after him and slammed the door shut behind them, leaving Cullen and Julian alone.

Julian stood looking out the window, his hands clasped behind his back.

“Cullen, we need to talk.”

* * *

An hour later, Cullen left. His mind was reeling. What Julian had said, what he had proposed, Cullen wasn’t sure he could do it. The cost was simply too high, but the reward -

His thoughts were interrupted as he walked along the battlements and caught sight of Nalide standing gazing out over the horizon. He stopped dead in his tracks and turned to walk the other way but it was too late. She had already seen him. She walked up to him and smiled, and he struggled not to let the beautiful curves of her lips bewitch him.

“Is it true?” she asked, her voice full of wonder and warmth. “Did you make him leave?”

Cullen made a decision on the spot. “It’s true,” he said, and he could hear how hollow his own voice sounded. “Now, please, leave me alone. I have done you this favor, so do me one and don’t bother me again.”

He couldn’t look at her, and when she didn’t protest or even say anything when he turned away from her and started walking in the other direction, he didn’t know if he was glad or heartbroken.


	9. Chapter 9

To Cullen’s great relief, Julian had decided to send Lyria back home to Ostwick. She had protested, of course, but Julian had simply implied that maybe he would take a little trip home then, to take up his inheritance as the oldest male Trevelyan, effectively sending Lyria packing with nothing but the Trevelyan name on her back. She had gone quietly after that, even though she was livid that Cullen was not going with her. Julian had claimed to need him as his commander still, which while not untrue, was not his only reason. Cullen knew Julian wanted to keep him close so that he could watch him endure the torture of what was happening. Nalide was to stay in Skyhold with her brother and stepfather. It was what Cullen had wanted, before. Now, it was his worst nightmare.

Days had passed since he and Julian sent Savir packing, and Lyria had gone as well. Cullen had barely spoken to Nalide since. He tried to avoid her at all costs, and she hadn’t sought him out since he had brushed her off at the battlements. He had no idea what was going through her head, how she interpreted his callous behavior. He saw her sometimes in the garden or on her way to the small chantry. She seemed to be spending a lot of time there. He _wanted _to go after her, to throw himself at her feet and beg for her forgiveness, to explain what he was trying to do. But Julian had forbidden him, and he would obey.

If he could just get her alone, he could tell her why he had to do this, why she shouldn’t lose hope for him, that it would all be worth it in the end if they could just-

But he couldn't risk it. Julian had eyes everywhere and if he got so much as an implication that Cullen had told her, it would all be ruined.

Fortunately, there was no lack of work to be done, even with Corypheus defeated. The Inquisition had grown into a massive organization and Cullen was still one of the most important leaders of it. But at night, there were no distractions. Only a cold, empty bed awaited him then, as did his dreams. His treacherous, fucking dreams, giving him no respite since s_he_ was always in them. Sometimes she screamed at him, told him vile and hateful things that made his heart break. Other times she was crying, begging to know what she had done to make him hate her but he couldn’t go to her, couldn't comfort her. Those ones were the worst by far.

At least he thought so until he started dreaming about fucking her again. Having her naked underneath him, under his total control while he ravaged her like a crazed beast did nothing to slow his obsession with her. The dreams were vivid, getting more and more graphic, more violent with each passing night, making him feel like he had barely rested when he woke drenched in sweat in the morning. He would have felt guilty over how dark his mind was, how roughly he had treated her – even if only in his dreams – if he hadn’t known how much she would have enjoyed it. Her words still rang in his ear – words she had spoken for real, words _more_ than what he could even dream up – about how she wanted him to unleash the animal inside, how she liked him protecting her, even _hurting _people for her. What it felt like when she wanted him covered in blood.

How was he supposed to not touch her with thoughts like those in his head? It would be near on impossible. But he had to try – for _her._

* * *

Nalide made her way up the stairs and the guard outside the door nodded at her and let her pass as she came into his view. The door was shut behind her and she continued up the stairs into her brother’s bedroom.

Julian was sitting hunched over his desk, naked from the waist up, deep into some correspondence in front of him when he twitched at the sound of her footsteps and jerked his head around. He seemed to breathe a sigh of relief when he caught sight of her and he stood up.

“Nalide, what are you doing here so late?”

She crossed the room and sat down on the edge of the bed. She looked around her at the lavish tapestries hanging off the walls, the luxurious furniture spread around. Her eyes finally fixed on the tapestry with Andraste hanging on the wall behind Julian.

Without looking at him, she said: “What did you do to him?”

Julian took a step closer to her. “Do to who?”

She still stared behind him. “You call yourself the Herald of Andraste, brother. Rather sacrilegious if you ask me,” she mused.

“Oh? How so?” His voice was on edge; careful.

“Because you call yourself that and yet you deny her will. I know you did something to him, or said something.”

“To _who?_” he repeated.

She shifted her eyes to her brother. “To daddy, of course.”

Julian sneered. “Don’t call him that.”

Nalide stood up so quickly that Julian took a step back in surprise. “_Don’t_ presume to tell me what I can and cannot call him. And don’t insult me. I am your little sister, not some stupid harlot you can charm your way out of a discussion with. Cullen, Father, dad, _whatever _my choice of word is, would not pretend I didn’t exist if not for you.

Julian raised his eyebrow. “How do you know that? How can you be sure he cares so much for you?”

“Because I know without a shadow of a doubt that he loves me, that he would lay down his life or any other’s for me. I know that it is the will of Andraste for us to be together.”

“How can you say that? You still can’t-”

“I _know_.” Her icy blue eyes bore into him and Julian almost stumbled a little. She had that odd look on her face that he had seen only a few times in the past. It frightened him. She looked almost like – like someone else, someone much older than her seventeen years. And there was an almost unnatural certainty to her face. “I know, and he has killed for me already. When he’s needed to, or when I’ve asked him to.”

Julian stared at her, unable to look away. “What—what do you mean?”

“Never mind. Let’s just say he has nothing more to prove. You think he is the one controlling me, manipulating me, since I’m so young and _he –_ he is so experienced.” Her eyes stared longingly into the distance before returning to Julian with the same ice as before. “And it is true, I would do anything he asked of me.” She stepped closer to Julian, so close that she could reach out and touch his face. After a second, she did. She caressed his cheek with all the sisterly affection she had shown him before their falling out. “No matter what, no matter how he would want me to prove my love for him, no matter how depraved the things he wanted to do to me would be, I would do it.”

Julian stared in utter silence at her, struggling to reconcile her sweet, sweet face and her soft touch with what was coming out of her mouth. She let her hand glide down his arm.

“Do you see, Julian?” The affection from before was gone as she dug her nails into the bare skin of his muscled arm. “I would do anything for him. I would happily play his daughter and whisper ‘daddy’ to him as he ravaged me in bed, or I would ask him to slit Mother’s throat so that I could be his wife instead. And he would do it for me. He would do anything I asked. So whatever it is you have done to him -” she dug her nails in even harder, making his breath catch in his throat as she suddenly withdrew, the surface beneath her nails soaked in his blood, “- I am kindly asking you the favor of undoing it. Or I swear I will break his resolve and whatever promise he has made to you and it will be no fault of his own. He simply wouldn’t be able to help it. It would only be Andraste’s will.”

Julian was too stunned to speak as she raised her hand again and stroked his cheek lovingly, leaving smears of his own blood on his face. “I’ll give you until the end of the week.”

With that, she slipped away and out down the stairs.

* * *

Julian stared out the window, still shocked and thoughts reeling. What he had asked of Cullen was far from unreasonable – even Cullen had agreed. Julian wanted to help them, he did – he just wanted to make sure that it was real, that what Cullen and Nalide felt wasn’t just a passing fancy or what it seemed most like to him: an unhealthy obsession. But seeing the person that Nalide had almost been married to because of his refusal to listen had put things into perspective for Julian. Who was worthy of his sister? No one, really. But at least he _knew _Cullen, had respected him greatly before.

If he was to go through with what he had promised Cullen—as long as Cullen kept up his end of the deal—was no small matter. Reputations, _lives _were at stake. Julian would not play god unless he had a good reason for it – and what he had asked of Cullen as proof was a small price to pay. Cullen only needed to stay away from Nalide for a time, a few months maybe, to show Julian that it was more than just carnal desire that drove him. And Nalide had to stay faithful to Cullen even though he broke her heart, to prove without knowing it that her feelings for Cullen weren’t just some misplaced teenage infatuation. Cullen had agreed that what Julian had promised in exchange was worth it – but Nalide was proving to be trouble. Julian knew how strong of will she was – even though he had never seen this sort of savagery in her before – and he had no doubt in his mind that she would do everything to break Cullen’s resolve to stay away from her, and that Cullen would give in sooner or later. If he wanted her as much as he claimed, even Julian realized that the man would have no choice.

He needed to speak to him again and change the rules, or else it would all be for nothing. He still wanted to see if what Cullen felt was real – Nalide he wasn’t doubting anymore. He shivered with displeasure as he remembered how her nails had scratched his flesh. No, she had made it very clear that she would not let Cullen go like this. So there was only one more thing to try.

* * *

When Cullen left Julian’s room, it was the middle of the night. They had shouted and yelled at each other for what felt like hours and Cullen had liked what Julian had to say even less than their previous arrangement. He could barely believe what the man wanted him to do to his sister and Cullen didn’t even know if it was worth it. He wanted to punch something as he walked through the darkness of the Skyhold night, because he _knew _how much easier his life would be, not to mention Nalide’s, if they had Julian and his promise on their side.

He didn’t sleep one blink that night, arguing with himself instead about what he was going to do, but he was no closer to a decision when dawn arrived. Sleep depraved and driven half mad by his internal debate, he decided that he wouldn’t be able to make up his mind without seeing her. He didn’t even need to speak to her, if he could just _see _her, it would be enough. He got dressed and went down into his office and looked out the window. It was still rather dark outside and she was probably asleep, but he would look for her all the same.

He found her in the chantry. The door was slightly ajar and he could see her through the crack, illuminated by candle light. She was kneeling on the floor in front of Andraste’s statue. He couldn’t see her face since she had her back turned to him but he could hear her. He stayed where he was, unnoticed, watching her as he listened to the frantic prayers spilling over her lips. She sounded like she was out of breath and he could see then that the skirt of her dress was pulled up and her hand—her small delicate hand—was underneath it.

He suddenly understood why she sounded strained, almost panting, and his blood started to burn in his veins when he realized that she was touching herself. He could hear bits of her prayers and pleading and his own name while she drove her own fingers into herself. His cock was already painfully hard from witnessing how the fairy-like creature in front of him was begging holy Andraste to bless her with her father’s touch again, how she begged for his flesh inside of hers.

Without even thinking about what he was doing, he pulled himself out of his trousers and started to stroke his cock, wishing it was his good girl’s fingers around his length instead of his own. He wanted to feel her tongue swirl over the tip, he wanted her to take him into her greedy little mouth, he wanted to grant her every wish. He imagined taking a hold of her hair and fucking her wet, open mouth with her silky lips touching his big cock with each, violent thrust, how she would gag and beg for more when he let her up for air. He wanted to go to her and fuck her where she was already kneeling on the floor, to punish her for touching herself without his permission by pushing his cock into her tight asshole.

He moved his hand up and down his cock more frantically to match the moans escaping her mouth, gritting his teeth while hearing his name spill over her lips over and over again. He didn’t know if it was only in his head or in reality he heard her beg for her daddy’s come inside of her, how she begged him to fuck her like she was a dirty, little whore _and _his sweet girl at the same time. How she wanted him to bite her, touch her, _fuck _her, please daddy, please-

When she gasped and moaned his name as she came around herself, he bit his own tongue and let himself go, watching spurt after spurt of his white come hit the ground underneath him while trying to be quiet. He flattened himself against the wall outside and tied his trousers again. He couldn't look at her or listen for one more second or his resolve to stay away would break faster than he could say her name. Having relieved himself didn’t slow his ravenous desire for her one, little bit, it was the other way around.

He left before he could do any more damage.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long to update, I've been struggling with the second half of this chapter so I decided to break it into two so I could at least give you one more chapter in the meantime.

Nalide’s head was reeling – no, her whole body was. She felt dizzy and had to brace herself against the side of the stairs several time as she descended them. She didn’t know how it was possible, any of it. Could she have been so wrong? But it couldn’t just have been her imagination – she’d had so many visions, too. She wasn’t crazy. Andraste herself had reached down from the Maker’s side and shown her that Cullen was her destiny, she couldn’t -

She couldn’t breathe. She fought back tears of panic as she sat down on one of the stone steps and put her head in her hands. Could she _really_ have been so wrong?

* * *

_ **Half an hour earlier** _

Cullen ordered everyone out of his office as soon as she walked in. He hadn’t known when to bring it up, when to tell her, but now that she had come to seek him out herself, he saw it as a sign.

He locked the door behind the last soldier and turned to face her, steeling himself neutral. She looked at him not with the apprehension he had expected, but with mild curiosity.

“Cullen?”

“Nalide. Please, take a seat.” He motioned for her to sit in one of the chairs in front of his desk while he positioned himself behind it, creating a barrier between them. He would need it.

She did as he asked, her deep, blue eyes never leaving his face.

“It’s good that you came to see me,” he said cautiously.

“I wasn’t sure if you wanted me to. You’ve been avoiding me.” She didn’t sound hurt or angry, it was merely a statement.

“I – yes.”

“I thought little of it at first, you know,” she said softly. “I know you have been busy, and you told me to leave you alone. I figured it had something to do with Julian and that you would come around eventually. But then you went on that trip, or mission—you were gone for weeks. I thought that when you came back… I thought you would want to see me.” She didn’t sound as sure of herself as before.

Cullen clamped his teeth together and fought every instinct screaming inside of him. “Things are… complicated.”

“How so?”

She looked up at him with those huge, round eyes and he had to look away, or else she would bring him to his knees. He fixed his eyes on the surface of the desk while he picked up a letter from it.

“I received this a few days ago. It’s from Lyria.”

He glanced at her then but she showed no sign of reaction. Cullen took a deep breath and steeled himself to keep his voice steady as he delivered what he knew was as good as the death of them.

“She’s pregnant.”

He forced himself to keep looking at her.

“Nalide? Did you hear what I just said?”

She blinked a few times, looking confused. “But—you’ve barely seen her, how is that even possible? Are you sure that you are the –”

“Father? Yes.”

“But she was here so briefly, how—_w__hen_?” She looked up at him from where she was still sitting in the chair, disbelief all over her face.

“What did you expect?” He felt cold inside as he tuned his voice to sound nonchalant. “She’s my wife and we hadn’t seen each other in over six months.”

“So what, you’re telling me you just couldn’t keep your hands off her, she was that tempting to you?”

“You sound like a child.” He turned away, unable to look at the hurt painting itself across her features as his words bit at her. He stared out the window. “She is my wife and I have my marital duties to her to fulfill. It would have seen strange otherwise, and she was so angry that Julian and I stopped your engagement to Savir. I had to keep her somewhat calm because of what we did for you.”

“Oh, so you mean you did me some great favor, then?”

He could hear her stand up behind him but he couldn’t bear to turn around.

“You swore to me that you were always careful when you were with her, to prevent this from happening. You swore to me that the only one you wanted to bear your children was _me_.”

Cullen bit the inside of his cheeks as he could hear a slight shake in her voice.

“Did your promises mean nothing, then? Was Julian right?”

She received only silence in return.

“Do you really mean to crush my heart between your fingers without so much as looking at me? You have your back turned to me like you wish me gone from your presence. I know this isn’t true, Cullen. You act like I’m some stupid little girl that you only wanted to fuck, to play with for your own amusement, like you were a cruel man. I _know _that you are not, you cannot deny it. I’ve seen into your soul, I have seen Andraste as we have joined together, praising us, just like you have, I saw it in your eyes so many times.”

Cullen whirled around then, desperate for her to stop speaking such truths. “What does any of it matter now? If Andraste would have truly wanted us together, the Maker wouldn’t have blessed Lyria with my child!”

“It is _not _a blessing!” Nalide screamed and Cullen could feel his eyes moisten with tears when he saw the raw hurt on her face. He didn’t want this, didn’t want to be the one –

“How could it be a blessing?” she continued. “It is a disgrace, it is spitting in the face of the Maker, that is all! _You_ let this happen, not him! How could you be so careless? How can I mean so little to you?”

“You didn’t mean little to me then, I never -”

Nalide stepped back and Cullen shut his mouth in disgust over his careless words.

“I _didn’t?_ But I do now? Now that your wife is having your child?”

“What do you want me to say, Nalide?” Cullen blinked away his tears before she could see them and he hardened his face and his voice again. “She is having my child and no matter what, I have to be there for it. Nothing matters more, not even you.”

He could see her how her breath caught in her throat as silent tears spilled down over her cheeks while she backed up to the door. He stared at the heart-shattering look on her face before she opened the door behind her and slipped out.

Cullen stood in complete silence for a few moments before he started smashing every breakable object around him.

* * *

“I take it this didn’t go well?”

Cullen looked up from where he sat in the corner of his office, on the floor with his back against the wall and a bottle in his hand. He had been drinking for hours, barking at every poor soul who knocked on his door to get the fuck out.

But Julian hadn’t knocked.

“Of course it didn’t go well. Did you think there was any chance that it would?” Cullen snarled while staring at the man standing a few feet away from him. He took another swig of the bottle and felt it burn on the way down his throat. “I broke her heart. Does that make you happy?”

Julian crossed his arms in front of him. “Of course not. But you had to tell her.”

Cullen only grunted and drank again.

“Perhaps she will come around. Perhaps she will forgive you. If she does, uninfluenced by you, I will help you, just like I promised.”

Cullen shook his head. “Why would she? If she would have come to me, telling me that she was pregnant by another man, that she had done it deliberately, I – I….”

“You what? You would have turned away from her? Even if she asked you not to?”

Cullen was quiet for a few moments before answering. “Perhaps not. I don’t think there is anything she could do that would make me not want her, to make me not want to be there for her in any way that she needed me. Not if she asked me to stay. But I didn’t ask her to stay. I all but told her she means nothing to me.”

Julian opened his mouth to respond but he didn’t get any words out as he saw tears trickling down the corner of Cullen’s eyes. Cullen didn’t even seem to notice, or care.

Another swig of the bottle. Julian looked around him and saw a bottle of wine still intact in the book shelf and he reached for it and uncorked it, taking a deep gulp of it. They stayed like that for a few minutes, drinking in silence.

“She must hate me,” Cullen said while staring down his bottle.

“She doesn’t. Not if all she has told me is true. If she really has gotten visions from the Maker or Andraste, they won’t stop now. Not if what you have is true. But that is the big question, is it not? If you are just obsessed with her and she with you?”

Cullen said nothing so Julian kept on going. “Lust can be a very, very powerful thing. Does she love you enough to forgive you for this immense transgression? Will _you _abandon your duties to your wife and your child for Nalide?”

“She doesn’t -”

“Stop whatever it is you are going to say, Cullen. You can’t say it to her, and don’t bother with me. I’m beyond words, now. I want to see action, what actions Nalide takes, what you will do. Empty words mean nothing to me.” Julian stood up and placed his bottle of wine on the desk. “But if what you both claim is true, that you are really blessed by Andraste, then I swear I will help you.”

“How? How the fuck can you help me now?”

Julian didn’t answer. He let himself out the door and Cullen drained the bottle, impatient for oblivion to take him.

* * *

Nalide woke up in the middle of the night, haunted by the dreams she’d been having. She swept her cloak around herself and walked through the quiet darkness down into the small Skyhold chantry.

She knelt in front of Andraste’s statue and prayed.

“Blessed Mother, please, I beg of you, stop taunting me with these dreams. It is cruel to dangle what will never come to pass in front of me like this, I beg you, please make it stop.” Her prayers turned into quiet sobs.

All night she had dreamed that she was near the endless fields of what she just knew was Cullen’s childhood home, even though she had never been there before. Her belly was swollen with child – _his _child. She watched from afar as he played with another child, a small boy who looked just like him. They laughed and Cullen swung him around and around and Nalide smiled. They were _hers._

How endlessly cruel to make her watch what could never be. Not now, not when she wasn’t the one with child. Nalide sobbed and the images of her dreams twisted into something even worse, images of her stepmother and Cullen sweating between the sheets, creating life where there should have been only harshness. She cried and begged the Maker for it to stop when she saw Lyria in front of her, looking content as she cradled her stomach. She looked fat and happy and then she saw Cullen. He was smiling and holding Lyria’s belly like she and the child were dear to him. Like he loved them both. Nalide began begging even harder for it to stop.

“What have I done to deserve this? Please, why do you make me see these things? Please make it stop,” she whispered, rocking back and forth on her knees. “I’ll do anything, _anything, _if you just make it stop!”

Her breath hitched and she turned around in fright as she heard the door open behind her. It was the middle of the night, who would –

“Nalide?”

She stared. “What are you doing here?”


	11. Chapter 11

Cullen woke with a start, drenched in sweat. He sat up in bed and moaned at the splitting headache that pulsed through his head. He had been drinking far too heavily, but that didn’t matter now. Not after the dream that had awoken him.

He could still see it so clearly in his mind: Nalide sprawled out on a stone floor in front of Andraste’s spirit. His love was screaming silently in agony, her eyes begging him to help her, Andraste pointing at him like he was the only one who could.

It had been no ordinary dream, and Cullen ignored the pounding in his head and quickly got out of bed. Only minutes later, he was clad in his armor and threw his fur across his shoulders as he exited his tower. He knew something was wrong.

It was pitch black on the battlements, but a few torches here and there cut through the darkness. He hurried towards the chantry, silently praying that he would find her there, taking Andraste showing up in his dream as a sign of it.

He arrived at the door but couldn’t hear anything from inside. No one appeared to be around. He pushed the door open.“Nalide?”

But the chantry was empty, the torches burning low. He was just about to turn around again when he spotted something laying on the floor a little to the side in front of Andraste’s statue. He walked up to it cautiously and tried for a few moments to figure out what it was. He leaned over and picked it up, examining it further in his hands.

His blood froze when he realized what it was. A metal clasp with torn white silk attached to it. Nalide’s favorite ribbon that she always wore over the clasp to her cloak. Someone must have ripped it off her here.

Cullen turned around, frantic. How could anything have happened to her right under his nose, in his own keep? How could he have let it?

He didn’t have time to blame himself further, the need to find her shoving every other thought out of his head. Where was he even supposed to start looking?

He went out and searched the courtyards. None of the night sentries had seen anything, reporting only quiet and darkness. Cullen became more and more desperate and finally he abandoned his fruitless search outside. Perhaps he would find a clue in the guest quarters she was staying in. He hurried on his way there, just about avoiding running. It took him only minutes but it felt like a life time and he was almost sick with worry. If anything had happened to her...

He slowed down as he approached her door and he heard muffled voices coming from inside. He put his ear against the door, careful to not rush into whatever was going on in there. He didn’t know the situation and didn’t want to risk her getting hurt.

The door was too thick to hear anything clearly. It wasn’t until he heard what had to be Nalide’s voice sounding pained that he dared to push the door open as quietly as he could. He peeked through the gap and at first he couldn’t quite understand what he was looking at.

A man with his back to him obscured Nalide from Cullen’s view but now he could hear what they were saying.

“Hurry _up_, I said,” the man hissed and pulled something against him, and a woman gasped. “We need to be on our way well before dawn.”

“My father and my brother will hunt you down like a dog, you fool, you – no, no, please stop it.” Nalide whispered the last part in pain and Cullen saw how the man had yanked her to him. He turned slightly towards the door and Cullen could see her now, could see his precious baby girl being held in what must have been a painful, hard grip by the neck and a knife being held against her collarbone. The knife was tinged red with blood where the man had rasped her skin and a few drops of blood ran down into her cleavage.

Cullen’s sanity left him completely and he slammed the door open so hard it shook on its hinges. The man jumped and whirled around, never letting go of his grip on Nalide.

Cullen stared at the man’s face. “_You_?”

Savir stared back at him with none of Cullen’s ferocity. He looked surprised for a second before he let determination settle on his face.

“Daddy,” Nalide breathed and Cullen’s eyes flew to her face, her exquisite, beautiful face that was filled with relief as her eyes rested on him.

“Nalide, I -” Cullen said and stepped closed but stopped dead in his tracks when her face twisted in pain. His eyes dropped to the knife that was cutting into her skin, the drops of blood being strengthened into a slow trickle.

“Not another step,” Savir warned. Cullen looked up slowly from Nalide’s wound to the man’s face again. He stared at him in silence for a few seconds, only Nalide’s pained whimpers making a sound as the knife was still cutting into her.

“You will let us go,” Savir continued. “You will let us go and I will take her home to the Marches where she belongs and I _will _make her my wife. You think I would just go home empty handed when you kicked me out last time? That I would return as a failure to my family, run off by my bride’s stepfather and her brother? To let them think that I didn’t have the balls to stand up to you? I am a _Veylyn_, for Andraste’s sake.”

“You don’t get to speak the holy mother’s name,” Nalide snarled, ignoring her pain.

“You shut your mouth, you stupid, little witch,” Savir spat and the knife sank back into her skin, breaking it just underneath the previous wound.

Cullen flashed his teeth. “I will rip your _fucking _heart out, you hear me?” Cullen growled. “But I’ll do it after, after I’ve cut your filthy hands off and let you bleed half to death first. In fact, you should be fucking grateful if that is all I do to you. You thought to force her? You thought you could _take _her from me?” Cullen’s vision was tinged black and red, a rage unlike anything he had ever felt before taking a hold of him.

It must have shown on his face. Savir’s hand was trembling and he backed up, still holding Nalide tightly, as Cullen closed in on him.

“Not another step I said, or this -” he waved the knife in the air in front of him, “goes straight into her throat, I swear to the Maker!”

“Oh? And what will save you then?” Cullen stopped only a few feet away. “If you hurt her, I will never settle for just killing you. I will keep you alive for weeks, months, and I will spend my days hurting you in ways you didn’t think possible. I will pull your nails out one by one, I will cut you, burn you, piece by worthless piece, and then I will feed those pieces to you, every last one, I will force them down your fucking throat. And when you have prayed for death a thousand times over, I will skin you alive and I will cut out your heart and I will fucking eat it.” He loomed over the man now, staring at him with promise that he meant every word and more. “So, are you really sure you want to keep hurting her?”

He saw the man hesitate for just a second and that was all he needed. He moved so fast that Savir didn’t have time to react and Cullen knocked the knife out of his hand. Nalide immediately threw herself away from Savir and into Cullen’s arms.

“Daddy, you came for me,” she mumbled against his chest.

He wrapped her into his strong arms and kissed the top of her head. “Of course I did, sweetling. Andraste warned me that something was wrong, I -” He stopped himself and leaned back and looked at the bloody mess below her neck. “You’re still bleeding, little dove.” His eyes flew over her head and landed on Savir who was backed into the corner, his face struggling to not look terrified. “You made my little girl bleed,” Cullen stated, his jaw clenched and his arms starting to shake around Nalide with ill contained fury. He looked down at Nalide again. “Will you be alright?”

She nodded and looked over her shoulder at the other man. “I _told _you, I told you he would come for me, that he would do unspeakable things to you if he found out. Yet you called _me _a stupid, little girl. You’ve signed your own death sentence.” She didn’t sound the least bit displeased about it. “You deserve everything he will do to you.”

“You can’t kill me, it would be a diplomatic catastrophe,” Savir said but his voice didn’t sound as sure as he tried to.

“Your family will disown you, you have brought shame on them,” Nalide said. “You not only disgracefully failed to secure the betrothal, now you try to take me by force? The Inquisitor’s little sister? I know the politics of home. No one would bat an eyelash if Cullen killed you right here for what you did.”

“Oh, I won’t just kill him, love. I’ll do so much more,” Cullen said tenderly and leaned down and kissed her on the lips.

“I _knew_ it!” Savir sputtered. “I knew the way he looked at you was anything but fatherly, and _you_, you filthy little whore, making eyes like that at your own stepfather, bewitching him with your unnatural eyes, you – you –“ He stopped abruptly when Cullen marched up to him and grabbed his collar.

“Who the fuck do you think you are talking to? You think you get to take her, hurt her, call her a whore, my baby girl, a _whore_? It will be the last thing you ever fucking say,” Cullen snarled and put his big hands around Savir’s throat, choking him and forcing him down to the floor. Cullen planted himself on top of him, his legs on either side, and let go of his throat. Savir gasped and gulped for air, but Cullen wasted little time. He pulled out a knife from his boot and held it against Savir’s face.

“I meant what I said. The last fucking thing you ever said,” Cullen said, teeth bared in rage. He forced the man’s mouth open with one hand, his strong legs keeping the writhing body in place while he put his knife into Savir’s mouth and started carving his tongue out. The muffled screaming only spurred him on, blood lust raging fire through his body as he carved and carved and carved. After minutes, the bloody piece of meat that used to be Savir’s tongue was ripped out and Cullen threw it on the floor.

“Oh, I’m not done with you yet.” Cullen plunged his knife into the man’s stomach and cut his way down, gutting him like he was nothing more than a dead fish. Savir convulsed, pained noises making their way out of his throat, muffled by the lack of his tongue.

“Daddy?”

Cullen turned around in an instant, looking up at Nalide who was swaying on her feet. “I don’t feel so good, daddy,” she mumbled and Cullen shot up, cursing himself for not thinking about her blood loss. He threw his knife to the side and caught Nalide just as she was about to fall down. He looked at her chest, it really wasn’t that much blood, he –

He caught sight of something slightly green on the edges of one of her wounds. “Baby, what did he do to you?” he whispered.

“I think… I think he must-t have laced… laced the knife w-with something,” she said faintly and Cullen reluctantly laid her down on the couch before searching frantically for the knife Savir had dropped earlier. He found it and smelled it, wrinkling his nose as he felt the faint odor of something other than blood on it. He turned around to check on Nalide again. His heart lurched when he saw her slumped over, her arms hanging limp and he threw himself to her side.

“Nalide? Wake up!” He leaned his ear against her mouth and sighed in relief when he heard that her breathing was even. She didn’t sound strained, she just seemed like she was sleeping. The knife had probably been laced with some sort of sedative, as a way for Savir to keep her docile. If Cullen hadn’t barged in, the scumbag would probably not have pushed the knife so deep into her skin and she wouldn’t have passed out from whatever drug it was.

Cullen’s head whirled around to the dying man on the floor, enraged yet again over what Savir had put Nalide through. His darling girl, she didn’t deserve this, especially not after what Cullen had done to her; all but breaking her heart. He got up from beside Nalide and picked up his own knife again.

Savir was still alive, barely conscious but he seemed to react when Cullen came to stand over him again.

“I meant what I said, you worthless piece of shit. I’ll cut your fucking heart out.”

* * *

Nalide felt like she had been hit over the head a hundred times over as she groggily opened her eyes. She barely knew where she was but relief washed over her as she blinked and found Cullen leaning over her from where he was sitting beside her. He was stroking her hair gently and he smiled widely when he saw that she was awake, his relief mirroring her own.

“W-what happened?” she mumbled and tears prickled her eyes as the confusion and terror came rushing back over her.

Cullen pulled her into his arms. “Shh, don’t worry baby, daddy’s here now,” he murmured against her hair and rocked her back and forth. She breathed deeply and calmed herself, or rather let him. She felt so safe with him, especially when he called himself her father. She sat up a little straighter and opened her eyes. She drew in a sharp breath when she looked over her shoulders and saw what was on the floor.

It was a bloody mess but she could see what used to be Savir. His whole chest and stomach was ripped open, and his mouth was open too, but it wasn’t empty. His torn out heart was stuffed into it.

Cullen’s eyes followed hers. “I’m sorry if it looks gruesome, darling, I didn’t mean for you to see it. I just couldn’t stop myself, I had to punish him for what he did to you.” He caressed her face. “He tried to take you. I should have protected you better, this is all my fault.”

Nalide shook her head. “No, no, I… Did you do all that,” she nodded at the mutilated body on the floor, “for me?”

Cullen nodded and she stared at him for a few moments of stunned silence.

“Oh, daddy, thank you,” she whispered. It was the ultimate proof to Nalide that Cullen had lied to her when he had said she didn’t matter to him anymore. No one would do what he had done to Savir without caring very much indeed.

She gazed up at his face and Cullen’s eyes shone as he stared at her lips and it was as if he couldn’t help himself. He leaned over her and pressed his mouth against hers and she let him kiss her with a deep moan escaping her lips before he pushed his tongue against hers. He swirled it around in her mouth deliciously and she clawed at his arms, desperate for him to come closer. In a matter of moments, he had stripped out of his armor and pulled her dress up, and with a grunt he shoved his hard cock into her, making her cry out in pleasure. He felt so warm inside her as he fucked her down into the couch, his eyes never leaving hers as he drove himself into her again and again and again. He cursed as she moaned louder, spurred on by the sounds she made.

It was hard and raw and _perfect_, he was perfect. Nalide could barely think straight with him moving inside her but she was elated that he hadn’t been able to help himself. More proof. He _wanted _her, needed her, his eyes told her this absolute truth as he stared at her while he groaned and thrust himself in and out of her, harder each time, like he was crazed with missing her.

He pushed his fingers against her clit, smearing her wetness all over it while he rubbed her, never taking his eyes off her as she sang out her pleasure and he fucked her so, so hard while she came around him. He followed only moments after and there was nothing quiet about him when he came inside of her. He didn’t slow down until they were both utterly spent.

He didn’t move from on top of her for a while. He held her tightly against himself, like he never wanted to let go. But eventually, he did get up.

“You go to bed and rest, little dove. I’ll come clean your wounds for you until we can send for a healer. I’ll sort out this mess while you sleep,” he said and nodded towards the corpse on the floor.

She was too tired to protest and let him lead her to bed. It stung a bit when he cleaned the blood off her but she was almost drifting off anyway. His care made her feel so safe; so sleepy.

“There will be questions to answer, sweetest. Tell the truth, but don’t mention what happened between you and me to your brother, alright?”

Nalide was too far gone to protest. “Okay, daddy.”

“Good girl,” Cullen murmured and kissed her forehead softly. That was the last thing she remembered before drifting off.

She could never have imagined then what would happen next, never imagined that Cullen would go back to being cold and distant to her, calling what had happened between them after Savir’s death a mistake. That his blood lust had caused him to lose judgment, that he had fucked her only because the animal in him had awoken after the killing. That he had _apologized _for it, but reminded her that he had a baby on the way and that he couldn’t keep fooling around with her.

That wasn't even the most shocking part. Had someone told her then that a week later she would be engaged again, to someone closer to her own age and one she actually liked, she would have laughed in their face. But still, that is exactly what happened.


	12. Chapter 12

She would never give up. Never.

Nalide sighed and sat back in the grass, watching soldiers spar in the courtyard. She had felt too cooped up inside, as always.

When she had woken up that morning, after the horrible night with Savir, Cullen was nowhere to be found. She was alone except for a healer who had mended her wounds while she had slept. Julian had barged in not long after, beside himself with worry and livid about the fact that Savir had gotten through Skyhold’s security, yelling about how heads were going to roll. Cullen had filled him in on some of it, it seemed, and Nalide did as she had been told and told Julian the rest, leaving her reunion with Cullen out of it.

When she had finally been left alone, after her brother had been assured that she was fine, she had gone to seek Cullen out, elated over what had passed between them during the night. Andraste had so clearly sent him a vision of her in danger, sent him to save her, and after how he had acted and what he had said, it would be impossible for him to keep pretending he didn’t care for her.

Yet that is exactly what he did. With a clenched jaw and a stern voice he had told her how he had let himself get carried away, how he had let his lust rule his emotions. He asked her to leave him alone and have respect for the fact that he would soon be a father, a _real _father.

She didn’t let it show how much the last part hurt, only nodding quietly instead before leaving. She wouldn’t yell or scream, she wouldn’t demand explanations or answers. Her quiet dignity was all she had left, and she knew it would get to him far more than acting out would.

She had gone back to her room at first but the stone walls were suffocating her. She had ended up watching the soldiers to distract herself a little, finding their disciplined training soothing to watch while she was thinking.

Something was wrong with Cullen, she just knew it. What she had seen during the night – the savagery, the fierce protectiveness, the burning in his eyes as he looked at her and called her his – she knew that was the real him. Not the charade he had put on for her after. She would _not _give up, she just needed to figure out how to act best, what her next step should be. She –

“Excuse me, my lady.”

She looked up and had to squint against the sunlight to see who had addressed her. A man stood in front of her, clad in Orlesian armor of some sort. She recognized the lion on his chest.

“May I sit with you?” he asked and smiled gently at her.

Nalide raised her eyebrow. “Really? Here on the ground?”

The man chuckled and sat down next to her in the grass, letting his hands rest on his knees. “I’m not afraid of a little dirt, my lady. I noticed you looking a bit concerned, I just thought perhaps you needed someone to talk to.”

“That’s very kind of you, ser,” she said and smiled back. His soft Orlesian accent and his voice did sound kind. He had blonde hair, a bit unruly, and a faint scar running down the side of his face. It did nothing to take away from his looks as he was more than a little handsome. “I believe I’ve seen you around the soldiers before, ser, but I don’t think we’ve ever been introduced.”

“Oh, how rude of me, I beg your pardon, my lady. I am Michel de Chevin. I work for the Inquisition, as a sort of mentor to some of the troops and soldiers.”

Nalide watched his face carefully as he spoke. She noticed another scar, a smaller one across his eyebrow. He seemed to have been through more than the odd skirmish, but she had trouble deciding his age. He looked young, in his early twenties, but it was possible she was wrong, of course. There was something almost other-worldly about him, she couldn’t quite put her finger on it.

“I am-”

“You are Nalide Trevelyan, the Inquisitor’s little sister, I know,” Michel said and smiled. “I think everyone in this keep and their aunt know who you are, my lady. You are hard to miss.”

“Oh?”

“I beg your pardon again, my lady, if this is too bold, but you are like a small ray of sunshine even on the darkest day. Always wearing bright colors, always with a slight smile on your face. And, if I may, you are a very beautiful young woman. It doesn’t go unnoticed, I assure you. I have to smack some of my soldiers in the back of the head when you pass,” Michel said and chuckled.

Nalide didn’t know if she was supposed to blush. Maybe a normal girl her age would when a handsome knight spoke to her in such a way. But Nalide didn’t find it in her to pretend to be demure.

“I find bright colors is the only thing to break the gray of the day sometimes,” she said and shrugged.

“This yellow one is your favorite, right?” Michel said and nodded to her dress which was sticking out underneath her new, black cloak.

She raised her eyebrow again. “Been watching me a lot, have you?” She expected him to chuckle again but he only smiled.

“It’s hard not to, my lady.”

Well, then. “Please, call me Nalide, none of this my lady nonsense.”

Michel nodded. “Of course, whatever you desire, Nalide.”

Her name on his tongue sounded pleasant to her and she turned toward him, relaxing a little. “Now,” he continued. “Want to tell me what’s on your mind? I hear there was some commotion last night. Are you alright?” He looked serious as he spoke.

“Mhm. I don’t know if you’ve heard that I was almost engaged to a man from back home.”

Michel nodded. “I heard.”

“Well, apparently he didn’t much like my brother and my stepfather deciding that he was not fit to marry me, so he decided to come back and try to force me to go with him.”

Michel frowned and opened his mouth to say something but Nalide cut him short. “It’s alright,” she said. “My father sensed something was wrong and he came to check on me. He saved me before anything too bad could happen.”

“I’m sorry this happened to you, Nalide. That man should never have been let back in here. Where is he now?”

“Uhm… my father took care of him. He won’t be a problem anymore.”

“I see.”

“Yes. So, it’s been a long night to say the least.” She looked out over the soldiers again. There were a few moments of comfortable silence.

“I have a feeling that’s not what’s bothering you, though?”

Nalide turned her head sharply, looking at Michel with suspicion in the back of her head. How did he know that?

“I… it’s complicated. Everything just feels like such a mess right now.”

“I can imagine, my lady. Sorry, Nalide,” he said and put his palms up in mock apology. She found his warm smile making it quite easy to forgive him.

He buffed her shoulder with his like they were old friends and it was all she could do not to stare at him at the intimate gesture. “What do you say about joining me for dinner tonight?” he asked. “Nothing fancy, just at the tavern. You could use some cheering up, I bet. And correct me if I am wrong, but you seem to be the sort of person who enjoys being surrounded by people, not just cooped up in your room.”

She resisted the urge to stare at him yet again. Was she that obvious or was he simply exceptional at reading people? She found herself agreeing to his suggestion far too quickly.

* * *

Cullen didn’t know what to think. When he had brushed Nalide off, breaking his own heart putting her through it after what she had been through during the night, he had expected wild protests, maybe even some screaming. But she had surprised him yet again with letting him speak until he didn’t know what to say anymore. She only nodded quietly and said that she understood.

It left him dumbfounded. If it had been her acting the way he did, he would have been livid, demanding answers, demanding to know how she could treat him that way. How a seventeen year old girl could remain so calm was beyond him. It made it even harder, it made him _love _her even more. His resolve had almost broken during the night, or rather it _had _broken.

But he had found it again, watching her beautiful face sleep while he sat beside her until morning. The only chance he would ever have to be with her the way she deserved was if Julian helped them. He wished that he could tell Nalide what Julian had promised, but he couldn’t risk it, not if Julian withdrew that promise. If Nalide stayed loyal to him no matter what, even though he had left her and humiliated her by getting Lyria pregnant, if they _somehow_ proved to Julian that this transcended an ordinary infatuation, he had promised Cullen not only to help him get rid of Lyria, but also to make sure Cullen’s last ties to Lyria as her widow would be cut and he would be free to marry Nalide, with Julian’s blessing, and _that, _to Cullen, was worth any cost. So he had to keep up the charade, because if Julian somehow found out that he had told Nalide about their deal, it would most certainly be off.

After Nalide had left, disturbingly quietly, Cullen busied himself with investigating how Savir could have gotten so far. After a few rounds of yelling and demoting and outright dismissing of people he held responsible, he was exhausted. He hadn’t slept since the day before but he didn’t feel like going to sleep all alone in his tower, so he went to have a drink instead.

The tavern was packed but a soldier immediately gave up his stool at the bar for the Commander, where Cullen sat down and ordered a stiff drink. He was on his second when he heard the faint, melodious laughter that filled his dreams every day, drifting off from the far corner of the room. He turned around and caught sight of her immediately.

Her shoulders were bare, her yellow dress standing out like a diamond in a pile of dust. She was talking and laughing with someone sitting across the table from her. Cullen raised an eyebrow when he saw who it was.

_De Chevin?_

Cullen knew the man well enough. A disgraced, former chevalier, now in the Inquisition’s service as one of their agents. The man had had exceptional training in his days and were teaching the techniques to some of the companies of soldiers under the Inquisition’s banners. He was polite, charming and magnificent with a sword, all qualities that Cullen respected. But right that very moment, with those charms turned at Nalide, Cullen couldn’t think of a single reason to like the man. And he certainly didn’t like how carefree and happy Nalide sounded when she laughed at whatever it was the Orlesian was saying. Did she know he was there? Did she do it to taunt him? But she was on the other side of the tavern, which was packed with people. He doubted that she had noticed his quiet entrance, which meant that she was genuinely enjoying herself. Cullen slipped out of his chair and out of the tavern, fully aware that he wouldn’t be able to restrain himself if he continued to watch how another man made her happy. _He _was the one supposed to be doing that.

* * *

Michel found her every day after that and Nalide found that she really enjoyed his company. They spent hours together walking the grounds, eating, talking, laughing. He was easy to be around, and it helped keep her mind off of what tormented her nights: Cullen. No matter how hard she tried not to think about him during the days, he was always there in her head during the nights, in her dreams, be it awake or asleep. Sometimes it was exactly what she needed it to be – a dream about how he held her, called her his again, how he fucked her like the beast she knew he was deep down. Sometimes though, she would wake up in tears over what he had said and done to her in the dream. Things she knew he would never do to her in real life, but still, it was hard to shake.

She had no more visions from Andraste, no matter how hard she prayed. No reassurance that everything would be alright. But she felt a little better when she stepped outside and when Michel found her sooner or later, like he always did.

About a week after she had first spoken to him, he invited her to join him at that evening’s festivities. A company of fire dancers had been invited to Skyhold, as entertainment for the nobles arranged by ambassador Montilyet. They were to perform in the large courtyard and Nalide was eager to watch the show, so she gladly accepted Michel’s invitation. The keep was bustling with preparations all day with servants setting out benches for the audience in a circle around where the performance was to be given, preparing food and drink and torches.

For the first time in a long time, Nalide was truly excited. She was standing in front of the mirror in her room, dressing herself in a gorgeous purple and green gown, one of many that her brother had gifted her with during her stay. She hadn’t worn it yet, having saved it for something special instead since it was by far the most beautiful garment she owned. She tied the back of her hair up loosely and let the rest hang in slight curls around her face. She placed some white and blue flowers in the strands of her golden hair and put on an exquisite pair of pearl earrings, also a gift from her brother. She didn’t usually bother with such superficiality, but she wanted to see Michel’s reaction.

There was also a very good chance Cullen would be there, and she didn’t think it too childish of her to let him know what he was missing. She didn’t wish to throw her friendship with Michel in Cullen’s face, perhaps he didn’t even care. But if there was an inkling of affection for her left in him, she knew it would drive him mad seeing her in the arms of another man, especially when she looked like this.

As it turned out, she had no idea exactly _how _mad it would make him.

An hour later, it was dark outside and she sat in the front row of benches waiting for the performance to start. Michel had met her outside her quarters and he had been as stunned as she had hoped when he had seen her step out of her room, stumbling over his words in a way she’d never heard him before, gushing compliments over her while trying not to stare too blatantly. As he had escorted her to the courtyard, arm in arm, there had been mostly silence, not the easy, familiar one that they could share, but a new one. She could feel him glance at her occasionally as they walked, and she blamed it at her dress at first. It flowed around her beautifully as she moved, surely that had to be what was so mesmerizing. But when she dared a glance back at him, she caught him staring only at her face.

She did almost blush, then.

As they entered the throng of people, the tension seemed to find some relief and he made some joke about the thickness of the crowd. She laughed and felt herself a bit more at ease as they sat down.

There was a large bonfire in the middle and musicians were playing at one side of the circle while the dancers and the jugglers were warming up. Nalide’s arm was still resting comfortably snaked around Michel’s when she saw Cullen through the flames. He was standing on the other side of the fire, his arms crossed in front of him, looming tall over most of the others who were sitting.

_Of course he prefers to stand_, she thought to herself and almost smiled. But then he turned his head and looked at her, his mouth hanging slightly open as he took in the sight of her. She had never really had an occasion to dress up like this before, so he had never seen her when she actually tried. He stared at her for several seconds and the look on his face did not pass her by. It wasn’t long until his gaze dropped to her arm, intertwined as it was with Michel’s. She was careful not to let Cullen see that she was looking at him, that she was scrutinizing his every expression as his eyes swept over them.

He looked positively murderous.

She felt Michel’s mouth close to her ear. “I think it’s about to start,” he whispered and she joined him and the others in their applause and lost sight of Cullen as the performers started to move. She looked on in excited wonder as fire flew through the air, dancers spinning around and around until she was almost dizzy and had to grab onto Michel to keep herself steady.

That’s when he grabbed her other hand, pulled her against him and kissed her.

His lips were full, gentle, and she let him kiss her longer as fire rained through the air around them.

When he finally pulled back, he didn’t let go of her hands; keeping them in his warm ones.

“I hope this wasn’t too forward of me, Nalide? I just couldn’t help myself, you look absolutely ravishing, and you are so beautiful when you are this happy, I just wanted-”

“It’s alright, Michel. I… I think I rather liked it,” she said and gave him a small smile.

He looked elated. “Truly? Would you mind me doing it again?”

She smiled a little wider at him. “Not at all,” she said and shook her head and he leaned in again, pressing his lips against hers. This time, she could feel his tongue gently searching for a way into her mouth and she let him in, swirling her tongue softly against his. She could feel him shudder beneath her fingertips and when they withdrew from each other again, he was staring at her as if under a spell.

“My lady, I have something I want to ask of you,” he said, his voice hoarse and his eyes full of light.

“What is it?”

* * *

She was so hungry, so so hungry. She had completely forgotten to eat, how could she have remembered? She was still in her purple and green dress, looking like she was going to a ball even though she was only on her way to the kitchens and it was almost the middle of the night as she made her way through the dark corridors. She jumped when she heard footsteps behind her and whirled around with her heart in her throat.

Her eyes widened when she saw who it was.

“Father,” she said. “You scared me half to death.”

Cullen was very close to her and she had to angle her neck to look up at him. He didn’t stop moving, stepping ever closer to her until he had her backed against the wall.

“What the _fuck _was that little display out there by the fire?” he snarled and she swallowed hard.

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t,” he warned.

She raised her eyebrows at him. “Do you mean Michel and I?”

She jumped when Cullen sent his fist flying into the shelf beside her head, knocking over its contents that fell clattering to the floor. “You let him fucking kiss you.” He sounded furious.

“So? Did you expect me to live out my days in solitude, now that you have decided that you don’t want me anymore?”

Cullen grabbed her arm and his fingers dug into her skin. “Don’t play games with me, Nalide, I am warning you. What the fuck were you thinking, letting him lay his hands on you, his fucking mouth? You are _mine._”

“Your daughter, maybe, nothing else, you have made that very cl-”

He smashed the shelf again, shattering the wood and she yelped as splinters flew around them. She stared at his hand. It was dripping with blood from the blow but he didn’t seem to even notice. Something desperate; dangerous, came into his eyes.

“You are mine,” he repeated and he pushed himself against her, trapping her even harder against the wall. “Only mine, do you understand? Do you think you can walk around like this, like some fairy goddess taken straight out of a dream, for some other man to fucking touch? No. You are _only_ mine.” He buried his face in her hair and inhaled her scent and she didn’t know what to do. She wanted it, wanted him to lose his temper, she wanted what was underneath. But was it the smart thing to do, to just let him? When she felt his hands grip her waist, it was _all _she wanted to let him keep touching her. She wanted him to bite into her neck, to pull up her dress and fuck her against the wall, she wanted him to be hers again, but then what?

He would just go back to the way things were before, and she wouldn’t let him, so she planted her hands against his chest and shoved with all her might, sending him stumbling backwards as she caught him by surprise.

“You don’t get to tell me what to do, not now,” she stated calmly. “Not when you have decided that I’m not even worthy of you, except when you get jealous.”

He stared at her. She decided to push a little more.

“I did let Michel kiss me, and I enjoyed it,” she said and cocked her head to the side. Cullen growled and opened his mouth to shout something at her but she cut him off before he had the chance. “He is warm and friendly and he cares about me. He saw how sad I was after you had thrown me out like I was rotting food after Savir tried to take me.”

She saw how her mark hit home and guilt and shame cut across Cullen’s face. “I didn’t mean to, I mean, you seemed alright and I thought it best-”

Nalide held up her hand and he grew quiet. “It doesn’t matter. You made it clear once and for all how you feel. But since you are here, there is one thing I would like to discuss with you.”

“And that would be?” he said, suspicion coloring his face.

“Michel asked me something tonight.”

Cullen made a face at that and stepped closer to her again. He took her hand in his, intertwining his fingers with hers, pushing her back against the wall again. “And what might that be?” he murmured and she lost her train of thought as he nuzzled her neck. Every hair on her body stood up as he bit into her skin softly.

“W-what are you doing?” Her intended protest came out more as a moan and she bit her lip and cursed herself for being so weak, weak enough not to stop him when he fished up the bottom of her dress and let his fingers glide over the bare skin of her leg.

She breathed harder and harder and just barely kept herself from moaning again when the tips of his fingers ghosted over her underwear. “If you are nothing else, you are still my little girl,” he whispered and pressed himself harder against her, letting her feel exactly what she did to him.

She knew she had to say what she had to say then or she would never be able to find the strength to make him stop.

It came out almost as a whisper in his ear.

“Michel asked me to marry him.”


	13. Chapter 13

“Michel asked me to marry him.”

Whatever Nalide had expected, blurting that out into Cullen’s ear when he was pressing her tightly against the wall with his hand between her legs, it wasn’t that he would _laugh _at her, but he did. It was a soft laugh, almost like she had told him something endearing.

“Did he now?” Cullen murmured in her ear. “Does he know?”

“Know what?” Nalide found herself holding her breath.

“Does he know how wet it makes you when your own father touches you?” He pressed his hand against her underwear, moving his finger up and down and she bit the inside of her cheek, _trying _not to make a sound while he rubbed her clit over the fabric. “Does he know what you need? Do you think the good and noble chevalier has any idea how to pleasure a wild thing like you, little dove?” He slipped his fingers inside her underwear and Nalide’s breath came out in short, panting stops.

Cullen dragged his finger along her slit, and he was right, she was so wet for him. How could she not be? He loomed over her, his eyes full of darkness as he touched her. His stare alone would have been enough to make her beg for him to take her, but he was doing so much more.

“He would never be able to even imagine how much you like my fingers in your beautiful, tight cunt.” Cullen’s voice was deep and ragged with lust as he slipped two fingers inside of her and she moaned softly. “That’s right, little one, and he would be shocked to find out how hard you want it,” he grunted, pressing his hard erection against her leg while he shoved another finger into her, stretching her and moving deliciously in and out of her, quickening his pace in rhythm with her moaning.

“How badly do you want my cock inside you?” He sounded so demanding and she could hardly find the words to respond.

“So badly, daddy,” she managed to get out, gasping as he shoved his fingers even harder into her. She couldn’t think clearly anymore, couldn’t remember what she had wanted to say to him before. He swallowed up her whole world, like always.

He let himself out of his pants and Nalide slipped down onto her knees, not even feeling the rough stone floor against her skin. The only thing on her mind was making him feel good, making him _want _her. Cullen threw his head back as the tip of her warm, wet tongue slid over the head of his cock. She wrapped her hand around it and took more of him into her mouth, so, so eager to please him, and she was rewarded by a deep groan leaving his throat. She moaned against his cock, feeling her own wetness smearing between her legs. Nothing else could compare to hearing him like that, _nothing_.

She purred against him when he grabbed a hold of her hair and set the pace for her, grunting each time he shoved himself into her mouth. It was sloppy and messy and it made her feel feverish; frantic in her need to please him.

“Does he know how much you love letting daddy fuck your mouth, little dove?” Cullen breathed. “I should reward you for being such a good, little girl. Do you want to make me come inside your mouth?”

Nalide pulled back and took a deep breath of air. “Mhm daddy, please, in my mouth and on my face, I want it so much!”

“Such a good, filthy little girl,” he murmured and he let her lick the tip of his cock once before suddenly pulling her up to her feet. “But I’m not done with you yet.”

He pushed the door behind them open and led her into the empty kitchen which was lit by a single torch. He lifted her up and put her down on the big table in the middle of the room and then he sank to his knees in front of her. He pushed her dress up and started kissing his way up her legs, making her shiver each time his warm lips touched her skin. He had his head between her thighs and licked the skin on each one, leaving a wet trail all the way up to her underwear. He kissed her on the outside of them once before sliding them down her legs, discarding them behind him, before sliding his tongue along her slit. He kissed her warm, swollen clit and Nalide cried out.

“Shh, baby, we have to be quiet,” he murmured and licked her again. She tried, she really tried not to make a sound, but when he slipped a finger into her while still licking her, she had to bite her hand to stop herself from moaning far too loudly. The wet sounds Cullen was making with his tongue against her cunt made her go crazy, she wanted-

She wanted more, always more. “Please daddy, you have to fuck me, please,” she begged, pushing her dress down exposing her breasts while gripping Cullen’s hair tightly in her hand, pulling him up from between her legs. It had the intended effect with him staring at her almost naked body like a wolf who had just found his prey.

“I want you out of that fucking dress, _now_,” he growled and he all but tore it off her, leaving her completely naked on the table. He pulled off the rest of his own clothes too and she stared at his big form looming over her, his ripped chest and his muscular arms making her even wetter as she anticipated what was to come. He leaned over her and kissed her ferociously, assaulting her mouth with his tongue and she let him, oh how she let him, and his hands were gripping her arms hard enough to leave bruises. Still, she wanted more and she knew how to get it out of him.

She wrapped her hand around his cock and started jerking him off, letting the tip of him touch her cunt with each stroke. “I want you to fuck me like your little whore, daddy,” she said and licked her lips. “Let it all out, please daddy, fuck me like I deserve to be fucked.” She could _see_ the shift in his eyes and the intended effect came instantly. He bit down into her shoulder, hard enough to draw blood and she gasped in pain followed by immediate pleasure when she felt his cock stretching her wet cunt. He wasn’t gentle or careful, shoving himself inside of her just like she wanted. He was still biting her and groaning into her as he started to slam himself into her, the hard surface of the table beneath them giving them the exact right amount of resistance. His hands were all over her and she craved his touch everywhere, all at the same time.

“Harder,” she panted and Cullen’s eyes went black. He pulled himself out of her and flipped her around, pressing her stomach and her face down into the table. She barely had time to react before she felt him enter her from behind, making her gasp as he filled her up so completely.

She wasn’t quiet anymore but neither was he. He fucked her hard against the table, making the massive thing shake as he slammed into her over and over again.

“You’re such a good, little whore for daddy,” he grunted and the sounds he made and his big cock stretching her so fucking good made her start to shake.

“Daddy, I-”

“What, baby?”

“I-I’m going to come, Andraste, please, bless me Father!” Her vision swam as she felt Cullen reach down and rub her clit, never slowing down his movements as she exploded in orgasm around his cock. She screamed and he let her, never stopping, never relenting. He groaned like a crazed animal behind her and she thought that he would follow her over the edge at any moment, but he had other ideas. She lay limp on the table when he pulled out of her, and she didn’t have the energy to look over her shoulder to see what he was doing.

Then she felt his lips against her cunt and she mewled in both protest and pleasure.

“Please, daddy, I’m too sensitive, I-”

“Don’t worry, little dove,” he murmured, “I’ll make you feel even better soon.” He licked and licked, making her writhe against his face. He slid his finger across her, coating it in her wetness, and he slipped it inside of her ass, making her convulse around his fingers.

Cullen stood up and just when she was about to protest his finger leaving her ass, she felt his cock slide into it instead. He kept his hand on her cunt, rubbing it while he started to slowly fuck her ass.

It felt so unbelievably good and she let him hear it.

“That’s a good, dirty little slut for daddy, letting him do what he wants with you like this, my good, good girl,” Cullen breathed and Nalide starting mumbling incoherent prayers, just like she knew he loved. It was so twisted and bad and so right and she thanked Andraste over and over for letting her feel him inside her again.

It felt so unbelievably good, he was so big and he touched her _just _right and the second wave was even more powerful than the first, she could feel it even before it hit her.

“Cullen, you have to make me – oh, Maker – you have to cover my mouth, I can’t-”

His hand flew to her mouth and she bit down into it and he let her. He was groaning even harder in pleasure as she did so before she started shaking around him again.

He followed her, letting himself go inside of her and hearing him make those sounds because of _her _made her want to explode with pride. He was such a large, intimidating man but she could still bring him to his knees.

They were both silent for a while, catching their breaths and finally, Cullen slipped out of her and handed her her dress, gently. She donned it while watching him dress himself again.

Things would go back to the way they were before after this, she could feel it. Not because he didn’t want her – he very clearly wasn’t capable keeping his hands off her – but because something made him.

She steeled herself. “Cullen. I told you before, Michel asked me to marry him.”

Cullen finished tying the strings to his trousers and looked up at her.

She inhaled deeply. “I said yes.”

He looked at her for a few moments without saying anything. She had never been so nervous in all her life, but she was determined not to let it show. “Cullen. Did you hear what I just said?”

“Did you, now?” His voice was disturbingly flat.

“Yes.”

He stared at her and she almost couldn’t keep her eyes on his, but she tried to be brave, tried not to flinch.

“Have you told Julian yet?”

“What?”

“Have you told your brother?”

“Uhm, no.”

A few moments of silence again.

“It’s late, Nalide, you should go to bed.” Cullen swept his cloak over his shoulders.

“What?”

“Be careful on your way back, it’s very dark outside,” he said and slipped through the door and out of her sight.

Nalide stared after him. She stood there a long time, trying to understand what had just happened, before she did just what he told her, her earlier hunger forgotten as she returned to her chambers. She didn’t sleep a single moment for the rest of the night.

* * *

After the early morning briefing in his office, Cullen left his tower and marched towards the part of the keep where Nalide was staying, certain that he would find the man he was looking for lurking around there somewhere.

He would snap his neck like a fucking twig.

He caught sight of him in the courtyard, walking in the exact direction Cullen had thought he would. The blonde mess of hair and the Orlesian armor was not hard to recognize. Cullen quickened his pace and was just about to bark at Michel to stop when he saw the bouquet of flowers in the man’s hand. He could see Michel’s face from the side and it took Cullen aback.

Michel looked excited, hopeful, _in love._

He considered this while following Michel a bit behind him, all the way to Nalide’s door. The man was just about to raise his hand and knock when Cullen cleared his throat behind him.

Michel turned around and a surprised look went over his face but he quickly gathered himself

“Commander,” he greeted Cullen and nodded.

“De Chevin.”

“What, ah, what brings you here this fine morning?” Michel held the flowers in his hand still, looking like he didn’t quite know what to do with them. Cullen looked from them up to the man’s face.

“My daughter came to speak with me yesterday evening.”

“Oh?”

“Yes, and I will get straight to the point. She told me that you asked for her hand in marriage. Is this true?”

To Michel’s credit, he didn’t flinch from Cullen’s hard tone. “It is, Commander. I know I come from humble means, and I have a troubled history, but the Inquisition gave me a chance to create a new life for myself. I will work tirelessly to provide for-”

“I don’t give a fuck about your status or your money, de Chevin. Nalide will never have to worry about that, she is a Trevelyan. I am only interested in one thing. Do you know what that is?”

Michel swallowed hard but kept his head on his shoulders, despite Cullen looming over him. “What is that, ser?”

“It’s making sure my little girl is happy. The last man who tried to lay his hands on my daughter, do you know what happened to him?”

“I can only hope that you were merciless, Commander.” Michel’s face flashed with sudden ferocity. “Any man who tries to force a woman to do something she does not want deserves a slow and painful death.”

Cullen regarded the other man, contemplated the absolute seriousness in his face. “What if Nalide woke up tomorrow, or a year from now, and decided she didn’t want you anymore? What would you do if she humiliated you so?”

Michel shook his head. “The shame would be my own doing, surely, for having failed so completely in making her happy. If she truly wanted to leave, I would let her go in a heartbeat. Why would I ever want her to stay with me against her will? That is not love.”

Cullen gave the man an even harder look. “And do you? Love her?” His voice was barely more than a growl.

Michel didn’t shrink back. His eyes lit up as he spoke next. “With all my heart, Commander.”

Cullen stared at the other man for near on a full minute in uncomfortable silence. When Michel began to squirm a bit, Cullen took a step closer. Michel was already backed up against the door and had nowhere to go, so Cullen was right in his face. “If you _ever _hurt her, I will rip your spine from your back while you still live,” he said and flashed his teeth.

Michel didn’t exactly look comfortable but he didn’t look scared either. “I should hope so, Commander. I can only commend you for looking after your daughter in such a way. She’s very lucky that you married her mother.”

Cullen suppressed the urge to snort at the irony of that statement, only nodding instead. “Good. We understand each other then. I-”

He trailed off, looking at the door behind Michel’s shoulder, and sighed deeply. “I give you my consent to marry her, then.”

Michel was beaming and a wide smile broke out on his face. Cullen fought the instinct to punch that smile right off.

“I’ll look after her, I swear to you, Commander.”

Cullen only nodded and turned on his heel and left, unable to speak another word.

He had never done anything so hard in all his life.

* * *

Nalide’s heart was racing. When she had heard voices outside her door and put her ear against it to listen and heard that it was Cullen and Michel, she was sure that Cullen would do something reckless. Nothing could have prepared her for what she just heard.

He had given Michel his consent to marry her, and while Michel might have been oblivious to the tone of Cullen’s voice, she was not. She could all but hear Cullen’s heart breaking as he said the words.

She jumped when there was a knock at the door. She opened it with shaking hands and saw Michel standing outside, flowers in hand and a content smile on his face, but she barely saw him, looking over his shoulder to catch a glimpse of Cullen instead, but she didn’t.

“Nalide, I’m so glad to-”

“Was that my father I just heard out here?” she blurted out.

“Yes, as a matter of fact it was. I have great news, I-”

“I’m sorry Michel, can this wait? I have to go speak with him.”

Michel looked confused. “But he gave his blessing, dear. I admit, I hadn’t expected it so soon, I know he is very protective of you.”

“What?” She had barely heard him. “I’m sorry, Michel, I really need to go speak to him.” With that, she swept past him, ignoring his bewildered look.

She went outside and caught sight of Cullen walking up the stairs to the battlements across the courtyard. She hurried after him.

She found him up there, staring at the horizon. A few sentries passed and Nalide stayed quiet until they disappeared out of sight. When she was sure they were alone, she approached him.

“Cullen?”

He turned his head slightly. The look on his face made her heart lurch. She had never seen such agony on a man’s face before. She didn’t know what to say.

To her surprise, Cullen laughed quietly then.

“I tried, you know,” he said. “I really tried. But you burn too brightly.” His jaw was clenched, like he was fighting against something. “I thought that I could stay away from you for just long enough, that you would find some way to endure. But how selfish does that make me, expecting you to stay loyal like a little puppy dog? How cruel? If another man had done the same to you, what _I _have done to you, I would have killed him for inflicting such pain on you. I deserve nothing from you. What _you_ deserve is someone who treats you like the treasure you are, little dove. If you really want to marry Michel, you should.”

“Cullen-”

He held up his hand to silence her, the corner of his mouth turning up in a sad smile. “He really loves you, I think. If he makes you happy, I promise I won’t hurt him.”

Nalide stared at him. “You won’t?”

“I won’t pretend like it’s easy. I would rather throw him over the battlements and be rid of him if it meant having you to myself. I _would _kill him, you know. I can’t fucking stand the thought of someone else touching you. But if he makes you happy – that is more important.”

Nalide wanted to stomp her feet in frustration, but she didn’t want to look like a child. She just didn’t understand what he was thinking. “You are talking as if I chose him over you, as if staying with you was an option. You have made it very clear to me several times that you didn’t want me. And then when I told you I had accepted his proposal, what did you do? You reacted like you didn’t care, you told me to go to bed, for Andraste’s sake! Like you couldn’t care less about what I did or did not do, once you had gotten your fill of fucking me.”

Something flashed across Cullen’s eyes and he grabbed a hold of her arms. To anyone else, he would have looked dangerous. “Don’t you fucking say that, Nalide, you _know _that isn’t true. All I care about is you.”

“Then you tell me!” she demanded. “You tell me what in the Maker’s name is going on! You _said _you didn’t want me, that your baby is more important than anything, and then you change your mind, again and again, like this is some sort of game to you!”

His fingers dug into her skin.“This is not a fucking game,” he snarled through gritted teeth, sounding angry, very angry and she fought the urge to shy away from him. Even to her, he looked scary for a moment but then his eyes softened again, and desperation seemed to replace his anger. “I would do anything, _anything _for us to be together, even if it means pushing you away.”

She shook her head. “You’re not making any sense. Is it all just lies, this too? You’ve lied to me so much already. I will never forget how happy it made me when we were laying in your bed, and you stroked my hair and told me you wanted me to be the mother of your children. The look on your face, Cullen, I was so sure you meant it, and then, you got Mother pregnant and-”

“I fucking _didn’t_.”

Nalide blinked, once, twice, staring up at him. “W-what do you mean?”

“I said I _didn’t _get her pregnant. I would never be so careless,” he said and looked disgusted. His face softened as he saw the confusion in hers. He was holding her in his arms still. “Oh, Maker, I’m so sorry, love. I should have never agreed to lie to you. I should have told you everything from the start, I’m so sorry. Look at me, love.”

She looked up at him and his face was so close to hers.

“Cullen, what is going on?” Her voice was weak. The hope that was clawing its way to the surface was almost too much to bear.

“You are all that matters, Nalide, do you understand me?” He shook her. “Look at me. Do you doubt it?”

She stared at him, and she knew that he was speaking the truth. She knew that she had been right all along, that something else was going on behind the scene.

“No one else matters,” he continued. “I only pushed you away so that I could stand a chance at what I truly want, the _only _thing I desire—making you my wife. But then you met Michel, and I thought you deserved – well, something simpler than this whole mess.”

“Forget about Michel, Andraste,” she said impatiently. “What is it that you are saying? How would it be possible for you to marry me?” Her stomach was a chaos of butterflies and expectations, and she almost felt like she was going to be sick. He had actually found a way to make it happen? It was too much to hope for, and yet -

“If I agreed to tell you Lyria was pregnant, if I would tell you that but you would still stay loyal to me, I was promised, Nalide, that we could be together. Not like this, not this sneaking around because I’m considered to be your father. It’s unworthy and you deserve so much more. Lyria would have been taken care of and I could have made you my wife instead. You deserve nothing less, so I had to try, no matter the cost, don’t you see?”

Nalide was stunned. “She – she’s not with child?”

“No, love,” he said, his voice hoarse and he leaned down and kissed her. She made a surprised sound but let him, let it all wash over her. She could barely believe it, feeling like she was waking up from some horrible nightmare. She was suddenly desperate to feel him closer and he could clearly sense it as he kissed her harder and pushed her against the stone. He didn’t even seem to care that they were out in broad daylight where anyone could see them. His hands were all over her and she moaned into his mouth, wishing that he would shove her dress up and fuck her right there for everyone to see how he claimed her as his. She needed to hear it again.

“Are you _sure _there is no baby?” she said between kisses and he slowed down before taking a small step back, still keeping her in his arms.

“I’m sure. She didn’t even write me that letter I showed you, so there is nothing of the sort keeping me from you.”

Nalide felt an immense relief at the reassurance at first, but then anger began to seep through to replace it. “Who, then?” she demanded. “If not her, who in the Maker’s name would dare to keep me from you? Who would demand that you pay such a price, that _I _should?”

Cullen didn’t have to answer, she could see it in his face but she didn’t want to believe it. “No,” she said, shaking her head. “He wouldn’t do that to me, it’s too severe, too much.”

Cullen’s silence told her everything she needed to know.

“Julian.”

He nodded. “Now, little dove, let’s be smart about this.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took me forever to update, you guys! Been super busy. Next chapter will be out in a couple of days!

Later that day, Nalide found herself standing in her brother’s quarters. She had waited there for almost an hour when Julian finally arrived.

He looked surprised to see her.

“Nalide? What are you doing here?”

She struggled to smooth out her features to neutrality – what she really wanted was to slap him hard across the face and ask him how he could have done this to her. How he had dared to meddle so, she wanted to demand an answer to how he could want her heart broken so callously by asking Cullen to tell her that Lyria was pregnant. The deceit, the lies, the viciousness of it all – just to keep her from Cullen.

It was almost more than she could bear, but she steeled herself and her face remained calm, as if she didn’t feel his treachery to the bone.

“I need to speak to you, Julian. It’s important.”

Her brother motioned for her to sit in one of the chairs in front of the fireplace, and he sat down in the other one.

“I’m just going to come right out and say it,” she said. “Michel de Chevin has asked me to marry him.”

Julian’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Already?”

“So you knew we were seeing each other?”

“I know everything that goes on in this keep.”

She wanted to snort in contempt – if he had truly known everything, he would have known that Cullen had fucked her senseless in the kitchen the night before, known how he had kissed her in plain sight at the battlements earlier that day.

“I must say I’m a little surprised,” Julian continued. “I know how you feel about Cullen.”

“I don’t want to talk about Cullen,” she said and adjusted her expression to that of uncomfortable. She squirmed a bit in her chair, like she was nervous. “What do you think of Michel?”

Julian looked at her for a few moments before answering. “A decent sort. Very loyal. Not a man of great means, not anymore, but we pay him well enough for his expertise.”

“So you would give us your blessing, then, if I decided to marry him?”

He looked at her with suspicion. “I suppose, but what - “

“I’ve already accepted.”

He narrowed his eyes at her. “Why would you have done such a thing? Don’t try to lie to me, sister, I know you couldn’t have possibly gotten over Cullen so fast. Are you even interested in Michel?”

She nodded. “He is a good man. He would take good care of me, make a good husband to me. I wish to marry him as soon as possible.”

“Take care of you? Make a good husband? Since when have you cared about things like that? You all but told me not that long ago that you would rather be Cullen’s whore than nothing at all, and now suddenly you desire marital bliss with another man? I don’t believe that for a second.”

Nalide sighed and put her face in her hands, feigning distress. It was time to put the final nail in and drive her point home.

“I’m pregnant,” she said, almost mumbling.

There was silence and after a few seconds, she pretended to swallow a sob and looked up at Julian.

“Cullen?”

“Yes, of course,” she said and her eyes filled with tears. “Who else?”

Julian stared out the window behind her. “Does he know?”

“No! And we are to keep it that way. As far as he is concerned, Lyria is the only one carrying his child. If I marry Michel quickly, I can say that the baby is his.”

She looked at her brother, hard, searching for every tiny reaction in his face. Would he break down and tell her what he had done, now that so much was at stake?

But Julian said nothing.

_Alright, then. Time for the next step, _she thought.

“I’ll have to travel home instantly, of course, to see Mother.”

At that, he reacted. “Why?”

“Don’t be silly, brother, you know how these things work. I can’t marry anyone without Mother’s consent.”

She was very interested to know how he would weasel his way out of this one. He couldn’t well have her traveling back to Ostwick, she would see with her own eyes that Lyria wasn’t pregnant then. But he didn’t know that Nalide knew that.

“I think Lyria is no longer under the impression that she has a say in who marries you, not after Savir,” Julian said and stroked his chin, deep in thought. “I’m sure a letter from me will suffice.”

“Oh, but that would be most unseemly. Her daughter engaged to someone she has never even met? Think of the scandal.”

“You would love to humiliate her so, wouldn’t you? Consider it your engagement gift from me,” Julian said and smiled.

Nalide wanted to strike him. How could he sit there and go along with any of this? Knowing that she was pregnant with Cullen’s baby, even _considering_ keeping him in the dark about it, letting his former best friend and most loyal companion think that his child was another man’s?

“It wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world, I admit, if Lyria was embarrassed. But Michel wants to go and meet my family, in my home, and ask Mother for my hand himself. He’s already asked Cullen.”

“Really?” Julian said with a raised brow. “I take it that didn’t go so well.”

“On the contrary. Cullen gave his blessing, saying he only wanted me happy. He even came to see me after, saying that if this is what I truly want, he would support it without question.”

Julian looked stunned. “Are you jesting?”

Nalide shook her head and her face told her brother that she was deadly serious.

“And he has no idea…?” His eyes dropped to her stomach.

She shook her head again, letting her eyes shine with tears not yet spilled.

She didn’t miss the look of uncertainty flashing across Julian’s face. Maybe he had an inkling of a conscience, after all.

“Anyway,” she said and made a show of pulling herself together. “I’ll go tell Michel that you gave us your blessing too, and that Mother is the only one left to give it. We’ll leave as soon as possible, you understand the need for haste, surely.” She turned on her heel and made for the stairs.

“But -”

“Thank you for your support, brother,” she said and smiled, trying her utmost not to let the venom she wanted to spew at him infect her words. She disappeared down the stairs before he had a chance to say anything else.

* * *

He grabbed her walking back to her quarters, pulling her into an empty corridor.

“Maker, it’s been little more than an hour but I’ve missed your beautiful face so much already,” he rumbled before he kissed her hard, pressing her into the wall behind them.

She almost laughed in delight as his beard tickled the skin of her chin, but the laughter changed into a moan in her throat when she felt his tongue in her mouth while his hand was sliding down over her breast. He kissed her until she could barely breathe before placing his mouth on her neck. He kissed and licked her there, lapping at her with a few strokes of his tongue before continuing to speak.

“Did you see him?”

“Yes,” she breathed. “I did what you said and told him that I was pregnant by you and engaged to Michel.”

“I wish you were,” Cullen mumbled and his hand dropped to her stomach. “Not engaged, of course, but carrying my baby inside you. That’s why we need to pull this off, make Julian confess and make him carry out his promise to me. Just imagine,” he said and kissed her again before pulling back to look at her, “that witch gone, me and you free to marry, Maker, nothing would make me happier. I would wade through corpses to get to that if need be, tell any lie, even stand seeing you dance around with Michel, if it all leads to you being mine, in every sense of the word.”

She moaned softly as he bit into the skin of her neck as if to drive his point home.  
  
“I would do anything for you, Cullen.”

He looked down on her, looming tall over her as always, his shadow and the light from the torches dancing across her face. “I know, sweetling, and I love you for it.”

They heard banging from the far side of the corridor, around the bend, probably a servant heading their way carrying a tray of food. They broke apart and Cullen looked at her hungrily. “Go to your betrothed, then, and tell him we’re leaving for Ostwick in a few days, at most. And let’s see what Julian does to stop it.”

She nodded.

“Good girl. I’ll come find you soon again, and I’ll make sure that for however long we can spend in each other’s company then, you’ll forget that any man but me even exists.”

He smiled slyly at her and went out the door to the side, leaving her breathless, as always.

* * *

Cullen was in his office that night when Julian walked in. Cullen nodded for the last soldiers he was talking to and they left, leaving him and Julian alone.

The Inquisitor pinned Cullen with a hard look.

“Do you care to explain why you gave Nalide your consent to marry another man?”

Cullen shrugged. “What was I suppose to do? She wants to marry him. Should I have denied her, after breaking her heart already?”

“Why didn’t you tell her the truth, then? That this whole thing with Lyria expecting your child is a lie? If you can’t have her either way, why not just tell her?”

“I was going to, but then I spoke to Michel. I heard how he spoke of her, with admiration and respect. If she wants him, I won’t stand in their way.”

“But she only wants him because she thinks you’ve left her.”

“Perhaps. But this is what you’ve wanted all along, isn’t it? So why do you look so bothered?”

“Because, now Nalide wants to travel home to dear old Mother and have Michel ask permission to marry her. I can’t allow that to happen, for obvious reasons.”

“Stop her then, if it’s that important to you.”

Julian threw his arms out in front of him in exasperation. “Under what pretense?”

“That’s hardly my problem, is it Julian? You’re the one who’s ensnared yourself in all these lies. Why not just make this easier on yourself and tell her the truth?”  
  
“She would never forgive me. I love her more than anything, I can’t bear to have her look at me like I’ve betrayed her.”

Cullen laughed humorlessly at that. “Yet that is exactly what you forced me to do, without a second’s hesitation, just so that our love would be proven to you somehow, Maker knows how you can even doubt it at this point. And now you’re causing heartbreak left and right, even for yourself. Do you expect me to pity you? I fucking don’t, so don’t you dare come in here and ask for my fucking advice on how to clean up your own mess.”

“I’m not asking for your damned advice.” Julian looked thunderous.

“Oh, so you have it all figured out then? Tell me, what was the plan exactly, if she would have held out for me, despite everything? You promised you would help us. How would you have explained Lyria’s pregnancy suddenly being non-existent then?”

“Miscarriage, the old bitch was lying, anything, what does it matter?”

“There is your answer. Tell Nalide any of those things before she leaves and the problem is solved.”

“Then there is nothing to stop her from going back to you.”

“You think she would?” Cullen snorted. “After all I’ve put her through?”

“Of course. If she knew that Lyria wasn’t pregnant, she wouldn’t need Michel anymore, not if you were still around.”

Cullen raised his eyebrows. “Oh? And what exactly is it that she ‘needs’ him for now?”

He could see Julian’s face stiffen as the man realized he’d said too much. He had no idea that Cullen knew all about Nalide’s supposed pregnancy.

“Never mind. I suppose I’ll just have to go with you all to Ostwick, then, to control the situation first hand.”

“What?”

Cullen didn’t like the sound of that one bit. Having Julian watching their every step on the way to the Marches? Maybe even convincing Lyria to lie to Nalide about being pregnant? Not that he knew any reason why she would consent, but Julian was cunning; far too clever. He would find a way.

This was not going according to plan, not at all. Julian was more stubborn than they had expected.

“It’ll be a nice, little family trip,” Julian said, his eyes cold as they stared challenge at Cullen. But Cullen knew when to shut up, he had no desire to make things worse. He needed to think. “And you won’t mind if I throw Michel and Nalide an engagement party before we go? Tomorrow night. We must celebrate, of course. All else would be considered strange.”

Cullen nodded. “Do what you like.”

“As her father, you need to be there and show your support.”

Cullen dug his nails into his palms, furious but careful not to let his face show a trace of Julian’s taunts getting to him. “Of course I’ll be there. For Nalide.”

Julian stared at him for a few moments, then turned on his heel and left.

* * *

The next day, Michel and Nalide stood in the throne room watching it being prepared for the night’s festivities. There had been an awkward silence between them for a few minutes, after Nalide had walked Michel through the grounds into the main part of the keep, telling him how her brother wanted to throw a party to celebrate their impending union.

She was relieved when he finally said something.

“I must say, Nalide, I’m a little surprised your brother wants to make a big affair out of this. I am not wealthy nor influential, and I’m sure a lot of people are upset that you are taken out of the equation as a political pawn. I know the way of things, more than one man would kill to marry the Inquisitor’s little sister.”

Nalide stiffened. “I am not cattle to be bartered over, Michel.”

He turned to her, not with an apologetic look like she expected, but with a gentle smile on his lips. “I know that, of course, my love. Had that been the case, I would have had nothing to offer and your father and brother would never have approved. I’m just saying how this will be looked upon from the outside. I’m surprised, like I said, over His Worship’s decision to do this for us tonight.”

Nalide’s jaw tightened when she heard him call her brother that. There was nothing about Julian to worship, but she didn’t tell Michel that.

She also knew that her brother did this only to taunt Cullen, to see how much it would take to break him, or maybe even her. She knew Julian was suspicious of this whole thing and tonight was probably some sort of test, but she couldn’t well tell that to Michel either, so she had to come up with some other excuse.

“I think that’s precisely why he is doing this, Michel. He wants to prove to everyone that he supports us.”

Michel looked unsure but he nodded and gave her a kiss on the cheek. “If you say so,” he said and smiled. “You look beautiful today, by the way. As always. I’ll let you get ready in peace. I’ll see you tonight.”

He left and she stared after him. He was a sweet man, and she didn’t like using him like this. Under other circumstances, maybe she would really have fallen in love with him.

A servant almost running into her knocked her out of her thoughts and she left for her quarters to get ready. If she was to be paraded around in front of the nobles, she might as well look the part.

* * *

It was excruciating. The final rays of sunlight were setting outside the stained glass windows of the throne room and Nalide had never felt more uncomfortable. She was sitting beside her brother in his throne, Michel to the other side of him. And behind her shoulder, like the watchful father, stood Cullen. Julian had arranged it that way, no doubt to force Cullen to watch in silence as one after another, people came up to her to congratulate her on her engagement to another man. She didn’t dare to even glance back at him once.

After what felt like forever of sitting there, trying to smile and say thank you to everyone who wished them good fortune, Julian finally rose.

“Good people!” He addressed the crowded room as if he were a king. Nalide wanted to spit at his feet. “I thank each and every one of you who has come to congratulate my sister and this fine man,” he squeezed Michel’s shoulder in an easy, brotherly way, “on their coming union. We are truly blessed to welcome such an honorable man into the family. I wish to celebrate with you all, and seeing that tonight’s skies are clear and unseasonably warm, the celebrations will take place outside. So go and eat all you like, listen to the musicians play, dance by the fires, marvel at the jugglers, enjoy to your heart’s content!”

A roar of approval and applause broke out before Julian bowed and people starting filing out into the courtyard, and he turned to Michel, Nalide and Cullen.

“Dear sister, I’ve let the builders make a deck outside today, just by the large fire. It’ll be perfect for your first dance together as betrothed. You go on ahead, and Cullen and I will join you shortly. Cullen will be there just in time for your father-daughter dance, of course.”

Michel looked glad to hear his soon to be brother-in-law’s words, while Nalide tried not to let her teeth flash at Julian. She let Michel take her arm and lead her out, and she was certain that if she had to look at her brother for one more second, she would have tried to bite his head off.

Cullen still hadn’t moved from his position behind Nalide’s now empty chair. Julian turned to him, the smile gone from his face in an instant.

“I want to know what you are up to. I don’t believe for an instant that you are fine with this. Let’s see how long you last, watching her in the arms of another man all night, a man she wants to marry, before you crack and I find out what you’re planning.”

Cullen said nothing, he just regarded his former best friend coldly.

“I _will _find out, Cullen, mark my words.”

Julian walked down into the room where the usual group of fawning girls awaited him and left the hall in their company.

Cullen moved then. He walked all the way out into the courtyard and made his way to the front of the crowd gathered around the wooded deck. Musicians were playing to the side of it and Michel had Nalide twirling around him in the middle. Cullen’s face was like stone as he watched them, as he watched how Michel’s hands wound down around Nalide’s waist and hips in a way that would have been scandalous had they not been engaged. He bore it all in silence until the song ended and he stepped up onto the planks. Michel nodded to him and stepped out into the crowd, leaving Nalide to take Cullen’s hand as a new tune began to play. Hundreds of eyes were on them as Cullen began the dance, leading Nalide around like he had done nothing else his whole life.

He didn’t do anything outwardly perceived as anything but what a father would do. No one could see how hard he pressed his fingers into her flesh and no one could hear what he said to her over the music.

But Nalide heard, and she struggled not to stumble as she grasped what was coming out of his mouth.

“You brother thinks to punish me, Nalide, that I will suffer from seeing you and Michel being celebrated, being close. But he has no fucking idea.”

He twirled her around and pulled her in close. “About what?” she whispered breathlessly.

“He doesn’t know what I will do to you later. He doesn’t know how I will make you beg for me to touch you, how I will spread your legs for me and drag my fingers along the warm skin of your thighs, all the way up to your wet, little cunt. How I’ll push my fingers in and out of you to make you beg daddy for more, my sweet, little princess.”

Her heart was beating so hard he could feel it against his chest as they spun around slowly.

“I’ll rub your little clit and lick you until you shake and come against my tongue, little dove, and then I will let you taste daddy’s cock. I’ll fuck your pretty mouth so fucking hard, just like you want it, until I can’t take it anymore and come all over your beautiful face. My sweet, baby girl covered in daddy’s come, just the sight of it will make me hard again. I’ll kiss you until you can’t breathe and then I’ll fuck your cunt, still so wet for me, and you’ll make daddy feel so good, baby, so fucking good that I’ll come inside of you. Do you know what I want you to do then?”

She looked up at him in wonder, big blue eyes staring at him with blatant hunger. “What, daddy?” she whispered.

He hummed approvingly against her. “I want you to clean your pretty face, then pull your underwear up, smooth your dress out and come out here and smile and dance with your brother, while your pussy is filled and dripping with my come. Will you do that for me, little dove?”

She nodded without a moment’s hesitation. “I will do anything for you, daddy, if you do all the twisted things to me you just said you would, if you bless me so,” she breathed and he pulled her tightly against him, still just dancing with his daughter in the eyes of all those watching. He pressed his hardness into her and put his mouth against her ear.

“I swear to you I will.” He spun her around one last time as the song ended and the crowd erupted in applause as they came to a halt. Cullen leaned down to kiss her forehead in a display of fatherly affection, before looking into her eyes and saying so low that only she could hear: “Then I will unleash chaos upon your brother.”


	15. Chapter 15

Cullen could have spotted the Rivaini beauty in the crowd from a million miles away, despite the darkness of the night. The light from the torches and the bonfires danced in her rich, chestnut hair and she was taller than even most men around her – men who at all times were falling over themselves trying to get her attention and favor. Cullen laughed quietly to himself as he witnessed just such a display as he was approaching her – some pale noble speaking to her, obviously trying to get her to stay interested in whatever he was saying. A valiant effort, considering the utterly bored look on her face. The moment she caught sight of Cullen, she simply turned around to face him, effectively dismissing the other man who quickly walked away, head hanging low in defeat.

“Leonora,” Cullen greeted her and bowed slightly. The corner of the woman’s lips curved upward in a sultry smile – not that she could help it. Her dark, exotic features made her look seductive pretty much all the time.

“Commander, believe me when I tell you what a pleasure it is to see you. I thought this would be an exciting night but so far, all that’s happened is my ears hurting from all this useless chatter.”

“My dear, isn’t it your job to listen to what people have to say? Keep your ears open to all that is happening in this hold? Don’t pretend that you do not, Leonora.” Cullen flashed her a smile, all charms on display.

“Being the Rivaini ambassador in Skyhold these days is dull work, Cullen,” she said and pouted. He huffed out a quiet laugh, the expression on her face was so at odds with the rest of her regal demeanor. “These half-wits that are always pestering me have absolutely nothing useful to say.”

“Can you blame them? You are too beautiful for words to come out straight from their frightened, little mouths.”

“Yet they flow perfectly fine out of yours, as always,” she smiled and put a hand on his chest. “Tell me Cullen, why _did _you marry that dry, Marcher woman again? You and me could have had so much fun, but you’ve always been so busy and now that you are not, you are married instead. Such a dreadful shame. Real men don’t exactly grow on trees around here, but oh, you certainly are one.”

She had closed in on him, her hand still against his chest as her amber eyes looked into his, clearly up to no good.

Cullen smiled again. It was perfect.

“I’ll admit, I _am _a fine specimen, Leonora, but lucky for you, I’m not the only one,” he said and grabbed her hand and spun her around so that her back pressed into his chest. He pulled her hair back with his free hand and placed his mouth against her ear. “Don’t you see the grand prize over there?” he whispered and he could feel her shiver against him while he lifted her hand and pointed to one of the tables set up by one of the fires in the courtyard. At the head of it was Julian.

“The Inquisitor?” she said and raised an eyebrow. “He is gorgeous, there is no denying that. But he _is _the Inquisitor. He could have any girl he wanted.”

“Girl, yes,” Cullen agreed. “But a woman such as yourself? Hot blood and the grace of a queen? That’s not easy to come by.”

“You’re trying to flatter me?” Leonora turned her eyes back to Cullen and looked at him suspiciously but a smile still played at her lips. “Whatever for?”

“Julian has had his eyes on you for a long time, my dear. He hasn’t had the time, though.”

Leonora snorted. “Please, I know most things that goes on around here. He takes a new one to bed every week.”

“To bed, yes, but he would never think to just fuck a woman such as yourself. You deserve so much more, and you would no doubt settle for anything less than a full blown courtship.”

“A courtship?” She rolled her eyes. “I’m not interested in becoming the Inquisitor’s little concubine. I have my own plans, plans that involve politics back in Rivain. I do not intend to be stuck in Skyhold for the rest of my days.”

“I’m not saying you should be domesticated, dear, I should like to keep my head, thank you. But tonight, won’t you do me the favor of distracting him, at least?”

That seemed to really pique her interest. “What are you up to, Commander, hmm? I might just play along if you tell me.”

“I need to speak to my daughter alone, and I can’t do that with Julian watching over me like a hawk.” Cullen saw no need to beat around the bush, she would see right through him if he did and he really needed her if this was going to work.

“Why wouldn’t he let you? Sure you don’t want me to distract the chevalier instead?” Leonora’s eyes flitted over to where Michel was sitting at another table, his arms around Nalide who was perched in his lap. “Seems he is the one who you will have trouble getting rid off if you wish to be alone with the young one.”

Cullen’s jaw clenched as Michel kissed Nalide on the lips while his hand was stroking her side. He had to keep his composure.

“He will not be a problem, I assure you. But Julian most certainly will be.”

Leonora watched Cullen’s face very carefully as he spoke but if she was suspicious of his reasons for wanting Nalide alone, she didn’t say anything.

“Well, for _you _I suppose that I could find it in my heart to distract Julian. For a little while, at least. But you will owe me.”

“I don’t mind,” Cullen said and smirked, and the Rivaini looked more than pleased.

“Let me get to work then. See you later, I should hope,” she said and blew him a kiss over her shoulder as she walked away from him and started toward Julian.

Cullen breathed a sigh of relief and his eyes shifted over to Michel and Nalide. She looked like a dream in her cream colored dress, intricate lace covering her arms and chest and the skirt of the dress flowing down in waves of satin. She had flowers in her hair as she usually did when she was dressed up, dozens of little white ones braided into the locks of her long, blonde hair. Cullen wished he could let his fingers glide through it, touching the back of her neck as he did, making her shiver like he knew she would if he touched her there.

She threw her head back and laughed at something Michel said and Cullen’s eyes darkened as he stared at the two of them together. She was still in her fiance's lap and Michel very obviously had a hard time keeping his hands to himself. Cullen watched, his pulse rising by the second, as the former chevalier held his hand far too low on Nalide’s back and how he was trailing his fingers from her jawline down her throat, watching her face with enthralled eyes as she spoke.

Cullen wanted to cut the man’s filthy fingers off for touching what was his, but he swallowed the instinct and bit the inside of his cheek instead. He tasted blood in his own mouth by the time Nalide got up from Michel’s lap and excused herself with a sweet smile. Michel turned to the others at the table and began speaking to them with a content look on his face while Nalide walked toward the tavern.

Cullen’s eyes shifted over to where Julian stood, rapt in conversation with Leonora with the brightest look he had seen on the man’s face for months. Certain that Julian was well occupied, Cullen followed Nalide far enough behind so that no one would notice, all the way up to the upper floor of the tavern into the little nook he believed Sera used to call her own before she had left the Inquisition. Nalide stood with her back to him, looking out the window at the festivities outside.

Cullen could see part of her face from behind, see how she had a slight smile on her face as she looked out.

Was she thinking of the Orlesian?

Cullen grabbed her and pulled her to him without turning her around, ignoring her surprised gasp as he pressed her against his chest, holding both of her arms in an iron tight grip.

“Did you tell him to meet you here?” His voice was harsh as he spoke.

She tensed underneath his hands. “What? Who, Michel? Of course not, I-”

He tightened his grip on her, insatiable in his need to leave his marks on her. “You let him touch you all over, like you enjoyed it.” He spoke through gritted teeth and his pulse spiked as he thought of the other man’s hands on her skin.

“I only did what you told me to, Cullen, please...”

Her head fell back against his neck and he knew he was being unfair but he was already seeing red.

“Did I tell you to let him kiss you like that? To let his fingers glide across your face, your neck, your hips, like he owns you already?”

“I’m sorry, Cullen,” she whispered. “Julian has been watching me all night, you know it. He’s very suspicious and I just wanted -”

He spun her around and took her chin in his hand to angle her up to him before assaulting her mouth with his own. He wanted to kiss her so hard that it hurt, to make her forget anyone else ever kissing her. Whatever she had done with Michel, it was nothing compared to this, he intended to make sure of it.

It was hard and sloppy and he might have grazed her lip with his teeth so hard it broke, but neither of them noticed. She hummed against him and gripped on to his arms almost as hard as he had just done to her, like she was starving for him to be even more uncontrolled.

She jumped in fright when people walked by the opening to the room and she tore herself away from him and spun around so that her face wasn’t visible from outside.

“Maker, there’s no door to this place,” she mumbled.

Cullen, however, wasn’t concerned. He pulled on the rope that was tightened around the drape to the side of the entryway and the red velvet fabric fell across the opening silently. He turned to face her again, watching her lips swell from their violent kissing and her cheeks running the same, red shade.

“Why do you do this to me?” he asked. His hands were balled up fists to his side. “Do you have any idea what it does to me to see you with him like that? Is it punishment? For the times you had to listen to me and Lyria? Do you want me to feel pain?”

She shook her head violently but he didn’t believe her. “The other option is worse, Nalide. The other option is that you _want _him.”

He had stepped closer to her while he spoke, looming over her now at full height, dwarfing her in his shadow.

“Never,” she whispered, not daring to meet his eyes. “Michel is nice, Cullen. He is a good man.”

He was just about to growl at her to shut up when she finally looked up at him, and he was the one who shut up instead, taken aback by the fierce conviction in her eyes.

“But it doesn’t matter how good of a man he is, how sweet he is to me, or even how he puts his hands on me.” She grabbed his hand in hers and stroked it, as if she could tell he was about to start shaking with anger at the mere mention of someone else touching her. She _soothed _him. “He is not you. So he means nothing to me, no one else does. You are in my every thought, at every given second of the day. You are in my every dream at night.” She pressed herself against him and lifted his hand to hold her cheek while she stared up with him, her eyes hazed over in a dreamlike stare. “Every, filthy one of them.”

Cullen had to stop himself from grabbing her hair and yanking her face up to his, feeling himself grow painfully hard as she buried her fingers into his flesh over his jacket.

“I _hate _when he touches me, because he is not you. But I endure it, all so we can be together in the end, just like you endured Lyria. I forgave you for touching her, over and over, because I knew it was all for my sake. I listened to you fucking her for hours, but Andraste was always with me, telling me to hold on, to not give up on you. Is she not with you now? Has she forsaken you?”

Cullen shook his head slowly. “Of course not, little dove,” he whispered and the rage from before was slowly slipping away. He let his hand glide over the back of her head and down her neck. “I’m sorry, my love. I just can’t stand it, seeing you with him, seeing you look _happy _with him, it’s worse than him touching you. It makes me wonder, if I have any right.”

Nalide stared at him. “Any right to what?”

“To _you_. To stand in the way of you having a normal life, a normal marriage with someone who isn’t in your fucking family. The scandal it will cause if this gets out, that you are sleeping with your stepfather – if it hurts you in any way, I don’t know if I’ll ever forgive myself.”

To his surprise, Nalide laughed at that. She quickly regained her composure when she saw his raised eyebrow. “I’m sorry, Cullen, but why would I ever care what any of those vultures out there think?” she said and jabbed her chin in the direction of the window. “I care only for the will of Andraste, and the will of my own. And what I want is _you_. Let them talk, let them say whatever they want. When Lyria is out of the way, when my engagement to Michel is broken, you will make me your wife, won’t you?”

Cullen’s eyes darkened with promise. “I swear to you I will. I will cut down anyone who stands in our way, my sweet, sweet girl.” He pulled her closer to him and his face was a barely an inch away from hers.

“Show me how much you love me,” she breathed and she didn’t have to ask again before he was all over her, lips on hers, tongue in her mouth, her breathless little gasps urging him on. He had to be inside of her right that second or he would die, he was sure of it. He pushed her down into the cushioned bench while pulling the skirt of her dress up so fast that he scratched his nails against the flesh of her legs. She moaned hard when he broke her skin and it made him so hard he thought his trousers were going to break from the strain. He shoved her lace underwear to the side, there was no time pulling them off of her, and she already had his cock out and in her delicate, little hand, stroking it up and down while he moved on top of her.

The sounds she made when he pushed his cock into her wet, waiting little cunt were making his vision blur and he put his hand over her mouth, both to stop them from drawing too much attention to themselves and to stop himself from coming way too fast, she sounded far too delicious.

Shutting her up only seemed to spur her on and he could feel her tongue lick the palm of his hand.

“You have to be more quiet, baby, if anyone would walk in -”

She yanked her head to the side and freed herself from his silencing. “I know,” she whispered and smiled like a little desire demon. “They’ll see my daddy fucking his little girl into oblivion and they’ll hear how much she likes it, they’ll all say what a little whore she is for her daddy,” she panted and she _squeezed _around him, making him groan uncontrollably.

He lost all sense of conscious thought and bit down into her neck, hard, fucking her so hard he could hear the wood of the bench underneath them crack somewhere, but he paid it no mind.

There was only _her._

She had wrapped her legs behind his back, easing him into her even deeper and she really was moaning like a little whore for him. He was overcome by the desire to see her work herself on him and he sat up, never letting himself slip out of her, and she still had her legs around his waist as she was sitting on top of him.

“Let daddy see you properly, little sweetling, come on, take my cock deep inside that wet, little cunt,” he growled and she did exactly what she was told.

She bucked against him, squeezing herself around his painfully hard cock and she put her forehead against his and stared into his eyes while she fucked herself on top of him.

“Do you like this, daddy? Am I being a good, little girl for you?”

“Maker, yes,” he growled and he dug his fingers into the lace on top of the skin of her waist. “I could watch you like this for hours, baby, I could fuck you until your legs gave out under you, keep fucking you until you fucking begged me to stop,” he panted and the adoring look in her sweet, wide, blue eyes was almost enough to make him come. So innocent and so fucking wild at the same time. He would never get enough of her. “But we don’t have that kind of time, I’m afraid.”

He slipped his hand down between them and started rubbing her clit and she threw her head back and her moans sang out her pleasure. The sensation as she came around him was unbelievable, and he groaned louder and louder.

“Yes, daddy, come for me, come inside of me, please,” she begged, her voice coming out in breathless little bursts as she was still shaking from her orgasm, and he did what she wanted, impaling her on his cock as spurt after spurt of his seed came out deep inside of her.

They stayed like that for minutes, catching their breaths and kissing and smiling at each other, before Cullen helped her to her feet. He pulled her underwear into place again before dropping her skirt and smoothing it out for her.

He smiled wickedly at her and pulled her to him, aligning his mouth with her ear. “You’re going to feel my come running out of you soon enough, baby,” he rumbled. “That’s just the way I want it, it’ll be our little secret. Now, go dance with your brother, while you’re filled with me, just like you promised.”

* * *

He watched her the rest of the night, dancing with Julian, even with Michel, but he wasn’t even remotely bothered by it anymore. Nalide’s dear, little fiance could dance with her as much as he liked, she was still only Cullen’s. Whenever she caught sight of him watching her, she couldn’t help smiling knowingly at him. Their little secret.

Just before midnight, however, he was concerned to see how she stopped in the middle of a dance with some nobleman and excused herself. She looked suddenly pale, and he followed her when she slipped away around the corner of some stairs, after he checked that Julian didn’t pay attention, his eyes still only on Leonora.

Cullen heard Nalide before he saw her. He rounded the corner and stepped up to where she was doubled over.

“Are you alright, love?” he asked softly and he held her hair back for her as she threw up on the ground in front of her. She heaved a few more times before wiping her mouth and straightening herself on shaky legs, turning around to face him.

“How embarrassing,” she said with her eyes to the ground. “I don’t want you to see me like this. I must have eaten something bad again.”

“Again?”

“Mhm, never mind,” she said. “I think I’ll retire for the night. We have a lot of preparations to do in the morning for the trip anyway. I’ll tell Julian and Michel. Perhaps you had better slip away now as well, no good if anyone sees us walking back together.”

She still looked sickly. Cullen didn’t like it at all but he nodded to her all the same. “Alright. But promise you’ll go see a healer if you don’t feel better in the next hour.”

She smiled at him. “Of course.”

He leaned over to kiss her cheek but she shied away from him. “Maker, Cullen, don’t, I’m disgusting!”

“Nonsense,” he mumbled and kissed her anyway. “Be careful now.”

She smiled again, weakly, but still. “I promise.”

* * *

Cullen had been up since dawn, barely able to sleep all night. It was around six o’clock in the morning when he tapped lightly on Nalide’s door. He had to speak with her about the trip to Ostwick, how they were going to -

He heard a clattering sound coming from inside her chambers and he opened the door. The living space was empty but he heard more sounds coming from her bedroom. He stepped into it just in time to see Nalide heave her guts out into the wash basin.

He stared at her in silence until she was done, and she jumped as she raised her head and saw him in the mirror behind her.

“Cullen! You scared me.”

“Are you still feeling unwell?”

“It’s the strangest thing. I was fine when I fell asleep last night, and fine again when I woke up, I don’t know what came over me, I – Cullen! Where are you going?”

He didn’t answer her as he left her chambers and he had to keep himself from running to the infirmary. He couldn’t afford to rouse any suspicion.

Barely ten minutes later, he was back in his quarters with a mage, a healer that he had rescued himself on an Inquisition mission over a year earlier, someone who’s discretion he could count on.

The woman went over to Nalide where she was sitting perched on the side of her bed, looking pale and more than a little surprised to see Cullen bring a stranger into her quarters.

“Cullen, what is going on?” Nalide looked bewildered as the healer gestured in the air in front of her, like she was caressing Nalide from top to toe without even touching her. After a minute of awkward silence, the woman stopped what she was doing and turned to Cullen and nodded, before slipping out the door, leaving the two of them alone.

Cullen stared at Nalide without so much as a word.

“Cullen, what is going _on_?” she repeated. “You’re scaring me.”

He snapped out of his trance like state and approached her carefully, as if making any loud noises would scare her. He knelt in front of her and took her hands in his.

“Cullen, what’s this all about? W-why are your eyes wet?” Nalide sounded on the verge of panic. “Is there something wrong with me?”

Cullen smiled at her. “No, love, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. But what you told your brother before isn’t a lie anymore.”

Nalide stared at him with wide eyes as she put the pieces of what he was saying together.

“You mean… no, surely, you can’t mean that?”

“I do, my love. You really are with child.”

“B-but it’s much too early, how are we supposed to… I’m not even your wife yet, I can’t pretend to be… Andraste, Cullen! I-I can’t pretend to be with Michel if, I-I-”

“Shh, love, come here,” Cullen said and pulled her into his arms. He’d never felt so calm in all his life. “Don’t panic, I will take care of everything. You’re carrying my baby inside of you, there will be no more charades, there will be no more forcing you to do _anything _you don’t want.”

“But how?” Nalide sounded like she was about to cry, but Cullen shushed her again and stroked her hair gently, soothing her.

“Your brother already thinks you are pregnant. He planned to hold me in the dark, to pass off my child as another man’s. He thought to keep me from you and the baby.” Cullen’s hand slipped down to Nalide’s stomach, his eyes following it reverently before looking up into Nalide’s tear-stricken face. “You wait here, my love. I’ll be back soon,” he said and kissed her hands before standing up.

“Where are you going?”

“I’m going to let Julian know that I know. That I know he tried to keep you both from me. And if he is still alive when I’m done, he’ll give us everything we want.”


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cullen has found out that Nalide is pregnant with his child and is on his way to confront Julian about trying to conceal this monumental fact from him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter, my friends. Sorry it took me so long but I've been having serious health issues for some time now.
> 
> Anyway, I hope you've enjoyed this story, thank you all who've read, left kudos and comments, it means the world to me!

Cullen nodded to the guard and walked through the door into Julian’s quarters without bothering to knock. It was still early morning and he expected to find the Inquisitor alone, but he was not. Michel stood by the window in conversation with his soon to be brother-in-law, but fell silent as they both noticed Cullen approaching.

Michel being there would make things more dramatic, but Cullen didn’t care. He walked straight up to Julian, not a hint on his own face betraying how he felt inside, and smashed his fist into the other man’s face. He had obviously caught Julian off guard since he had made no attempt to block the blow.

Julian reeled and clutched his bleeding nose, sputtering as he stared at Cullen in surprise.

“Maker’s breath, man, what are you doing?” Michel exclaimed, sounding even more shocked than Julian looked.

Cullen pointedly ignored him and stared down at Julian. “Did you think that I wouldn’t find out?” His voice was deadly calm, betraying nothing of the violence he had just committed.

Julian was silent at first, before spitting out blood onto the floor. “So she told you.”

“She didn’t. But after I caught her heaving her guts out on more than one occasion, I started to wonder.”

“Are you speaking of Nalide?” Michel asked. Cullen glanced at the man, who had a concerned look on his face, but kept on ignoring him. He might as well have been a bug for all Cullen cared of his presence there.

Cullen shifted his gaze back to Julian. “Did you really think you could keep this from me?”

“Are you sure you want to do this here? In front of him?” Julian jerked his chin toward Michel.

“Answer the fucking question,” Cullen snarled.

“_She _wanted it this way. She didn’t want you to know.”

“Because she thought that Lyria was pregnant. Because of your endless scheming to make her believe I didn’t want her. Even though you _knew._”

Something dangerous must have crossed Cullen’s face as he spoke the last few words, since Julian stiffened uncharacteristically. Cullen could almost smell the fear on him, a trait Julian very rarely displayed. It only made him more agitated, because it meant that Julian knew, without a doubt, how much Nalide meant to him, how much the baby meant to him, if he feared what Cullen would do now that he knew.

“You thought to never tell me, to marry your own little sister off to hide her pregnancy and let that be the end of it.”

He could hear a sharp intake of breath to his right.

“Nalide is with child?” Michel sounded incredulous. “But that’s not possible, I – I’ve never laid a hand on her in that way, you must believe me, I -”

Cullen’s head snapped to the side. “I know that. Maker, you really are a fucking idiot. Like she would ever let you touch her like that,” he spat.

Michel looked desperately confused, but Cullen just turned back to Julian, who still had blood trickling out steadily from his nose and his split lip.

“Of all the things you have done to me Julian, this is– this is unspeakable. No matter your opinion of me, to think to keep my own child from me, to let your sister bear the heartbreak of all of this, it is beyond words.”

“_Your _child?” Michel’s voice rang out through the room. “You mean that _you _made Nalide pregnant? But – but you are her father!”

Cullen stepped closer to the man, his face only inches away from his, fists balled up on his sides. “I am _not _her real father. I am barely even her stepfather.”

Michel ignored him, murder on his face. “How _dare _you take advantage of her so? To think, you made her so afraid that she looked to me for solace, for protection, I -” He turned to look at Julian. “And you knew this? You knew how he has violated her? Why is he even still alive?”

Julian surprised Cullen with his next words. “It’s not what you think, man. He hasn’t forced himself on her. Just leave, please, this should have been a private conversation from the start.”

“But -”

“_Leave_,” Julian repeated.

Michel looked like he was about to protest again but then he turned on his heel abruptly, casting one last disgusted glance in Cullen’s direction before disappearing out the door.

Julian turned back to Cullen. “Things have gone too far, I know that, I just wanted to honor her wishes-”

“Shut up,” Cullen snapped, jaw tight with anger. “I’m not interested in any of your excuses. You tried to keep my child from me. The only way to stop me from wringing your worthless neck right here, right now, is to make good on what you promised me before. Even if I didn’t hurt you, Nalide knows now that the whole thing with Lyria was a lie. I told her the moment I realized that Nalide was pregnant. If you don’t fix this, she will never speak to you again and you know it.”

Cullen hadn’t known how Julian would react, he had been so incessantly stubborn up until now, but when he looked at him now, he saw someone who was tired.

“You realize that it’s true, don’t you?” Cullen asked.

“I know.” Julian sounded defeated.

“So here is what you are going to do.” Cullen fixed his gaze on Julian, voice dark and full of command, leaving no question that what he was about to say wasn’t up for debate. “You are going to get rid of Lyria and I don’t fucking care how. You do it so there is no way it can be tied to me or Nalide. And then you will speak to the Divine Victoria, I don’t care if you have to use up every favor Vivienne feels like she owes you to do it, you _will_. She will make sure my marriage to Lyria is severed in all ways after my wife’s unfortunate death. I’m not even to be a widower. It will be declared that being married to a woman who in her own turn was only married into the Trevelyan family is a connection too far removed and that I have no right to either title, land or holdings. I will inherit nothing, and most importantly, Nalide will _not _be considered my stepdaughter. Again, it’s too far removed. You will inherit everything and you will immediately give your consent for me to marry Nalide, to protect her from the wolves that will surely go after your only unmarried sister when she is without the shelter of any parent. You will sing my fucking praises in public, paint me as a hero for taking care of Nalide, and welcome me into the family with open arms as your brother-in-law. I want fucking ballads written about me and her, do you understand? You are to use every trick in the book, every piece of propaganda-spreading technique available to you, for Nalide’s sake. I want people to forget I was ever involved with your despicable stepmother, and give your sister the most lavish wedding of the century, one she deserves. People will forget anything but the splendor of the occasion and how romantic it is that the Inquisitor’s little sister marries his best friend.”

Julian listened in silence.

“You _will _do all this, do you fucking understand me?” Again, Cullen sounded calm but he knew that Julian knew what his tone meant. He knew that Cullen would do if he didn’t agree, in ways most unhealthy.

After several moments of more heavy silence, Julian finally nodded. “I have just one request, Cullen, for everyone’s sake. Don’t let anyone see you with her before this whole thing is done and I’ve announced your union. The talk would lead to too many rumors, and people would become suspicious that Lyria’s death would be… well, not an accident. And you had better get your ass over to Nalide right away.”

Cullen raised an eyebrow in question. “Didn’t you just order me to stay away-”

“Guess who is probably with her right now, upset and demanding answers?”

“Shit.” Cullen had forgotten about the scorned chevalier.

“Yes, shit. I told you we should have kept this conversation private, so get yourself over there right now and take control of the situation, why don’t you? I have to speak to Leliana.”

Cullen was already out the door.

* * *

When Cullen entered Nalide’s quarters, he found Michel on his knees in front of her, holding her hand in his. Nalide looked too shocked to speak or do anything but to stare down at him.

When Cullen slammed the door shut behind him, Michel’s head snapped back and he stood up, still holding Nalide’s hand while glaring at Cullen.

“I was just telling Nalide that she doesn’t have to be afraid of you anymore, not now that she has me. I will keep her safe from you.”

Cullen raised an eyebrow and glanced at Nalide, who just shrugged and looked back at him with wide, confused eyes.

It made Cullen furious. His poor girl was probably still in shock after finding out about the baby, and here came the unwanted knight in shining armor barging in, a disgraced former chevalier, a nobody who was so desperate to rationalize that he just assumed whatever truth suited him best.

A disgrace. It gave Cullen an idea and he regarded the other man while stroking his chin.

“Tell me, Michel. What do you want most in this world?”

“What?”

“Answer the question. It’s a simple enough one, is it not?”

“I want to keep the woman I love safe, of course. Safe from _you_.”

Cullen ignored the venomous last words. “Oh, please. You’ve known her for what, a week or two? I know your deepest desire, Michel, and it is not my precious girl you want most of all.”

Michel spluttered. “What the fuck do you know about my desires? You hardly know me, you-”

“I know every little detail there is to know about the soldiers in this keep, make no mistake. You might loathe me as much as you like, but you can’t deny that I’m most competent in my job as Commander of our forces, forces in which _you _are an agent.” He paused and looked at Nalide. “Come here, little dove,” he beckoned to her.

She stood up and let Michel’s hand drop from hers.

“Nalide, you don’t have to do a thing he says!” Michel protested but Nalide seemed to have come to her senses and she walked over to Cullen and let him tuck her safely against his shoulder with his arm around her. She looked at Michel with pity in her eyes.

“I’m sorry, Michel, but you misunderstand. I’m not afraid of him. It’s not like that at all. I—I love him,” she breathed and stared up into Cullen’s face, her eyes dreamy as they fixated on his lips. Cullen wanted nothing more than to kiss her but he had to sort things out with the chevalier first. His eyes slid over to the other man again.

“Look, I know this is a shock to you, and I’m not entirely unsympathetic.” It was a lie of course, Cullen didn’t give so much as a shit about Michel’s pathetic, hurt feelings. But that wasn’t the point. “You thought you would be marrying Nalide, a dream come true for any man with eyes to see with. But she is _mine_,” he said and tightened her against him, every fiber of his being screaming out its possessiveness. “And while I’m sure you would have been dying to make her yours, I know there is something else you want more. Something you probably didn’t think possible.”

“And what in the Fade might that be, then?” Michel snarled, his fist tightened to his side. “Tell me, if you know me so damn well.”

“You want Celene, of course.”

Michel looked stunned. “W-what?”

“Not the woman herself. But what wouldn’t you give to be in the Empress’ employ again, to get the chance to kiss her feet and let her send you across the world on brave missions, all in her service?”

“You – you mean you could arrange that? No, it’s impossible, there is no way -”

“Me, no. Julian, yes. Do you have any idea how much Celene owes to the Inquisition? Her throne, her very life, everything. Taking you back would be a minor favor for us, one of many she owes.”

In the end, that was all it took to get rid of him. A promise of a chance to grovel in front of a woman who would never do anything but look down her nose on him. Cullen shook his head in disgust as the door shut behind the chevalier’s back, ten minutes and some promises later, leaving him alone with Nalide, finally.

She looked up at Cullen when Michel had shut the door behind him. “You are amazing,” she said, her eyes glittering with admiration. “How did you even know, I mean – you came up with this so fast, how did you know it would work?”

He chuckled and pulled her tighter against him. “Information is gold, little dove. You store it away up here,” he pointed at his temple, “- and one day what you thought was a worthless tidbit of information might save you.”

“You saved _me_,” she whispered. “I’ve made such a mess, I don’t deserve you.”

Cullen gripped her arms harder and he stared down at her. “Don’t you say that, don’t you dare.” He moved his hand to her stomach. “_This _is not a mess.” His voice softened. “This is a blessing beyond my wildest dreams. You deserve not just me but the world, and I _am_ going to give it to you.”

He kissed her hands and she stared up at him breathlessly.

“I’ve spoken to Julian and he’s agreed to do all I asked of him,” he said.

“Truly?” The look on her face broke Cullen’s heart, it was too unsure, like she didn’t dare believe in what he said. He pushed her back softly to sit on the edge of the bed and he fell to his knees before her while still holding her hands in his.

“Soon, your so called _mother _will be gone from this earth. She doesn’t deserve to breathe the same air as you, my love, after all she’s done to you.” He felt blackness in his soul just thinking of the abuse Lyria had put her through, but now was not the time to let rage surface. “Then, Julian will announce that you and I are to be wed. It will be a heroic tale of how I’m doing it to protect you at first, before I fall madly in love with you. We are meant to be together, and there will be songs written about our love, make no mistake, but first we have to act like it’s out of duty and safety that we do this. No public displays of affection before we are married and it is conceivable that we have had time to fall in love. Alright, love?”

She nodded, her eyes eager. “Of course, anything to be with you. But won’t this all have to happen very quickly? Before I start showing-”

“Your mother will be dead within days, and the wedding will take place within the month, at most. Don’t worry, my love. The babe is still very young, it will be months before it’s hard to hide the beauty of it growing inside you. We will simply say that in the end, the babe came early, it’s not unusual. And we will be safely tucked away by then, out of prying eyes. I swear to you that you will have a peaceful time ahead of you, no one will disturb you, especially when the birth draws near. Only people I trust completely will be around us.”

“Where will we go?”

Cullen smiled and kissed the corner of her mouth. “Wherever your heart desires, love. Your wish is my command.”

* * *

The wedding took place in Redcliffe almost exactly a month later. Cullen was adamant not to hold the ceremony in Skyhold, he didn’t want the memories of his wedding to Lyria to taint what was to be the happiest day of his life.

He hadn’t seen much of Nalide, not for weeks and it drove him half-mad, but they had agreed that being careful was the best option. No slip-ups could take place when they were so, so close to getting everything they wanted.

But it was all worth it when he saw her walking toward him where he was standing next to the Revered Mother. The hundreds of wedding guests gathered around them all disappeared from his mind and there was only _her –_ gliding down the center aisle in an extraordinary dress made out of his favorite sunshine golden yellow, the train of it yard after yard long, picked up and carried by two young girls in modest, white dresses.

He held his breath as she stopped right before him, and he glanced to the metal flowers braided into her hair – they looked like solid gold. Julian had truly spared no expense, nor should he have. Nalide looked more regal than even a queen, more like a goddess of the sun. But he forgot all that when he looked down into her face and saw the way she looked at him.

She _should _have looked neutral, neither happy nor unhappy, just like they’ve both acted up until that point, but she either didn’t care or simply couldn’t stop herself. Her eyes were burning, looking at him with such reverent intensity that he had to steel himself to not grab her and kiss her with all his pent-up hunger before the ceremony had even started.

He barely heard what the Revered Mother drawled on about, he just kept staring at Nalide, his eyes as full of promises as hers.

When it was done and he was to seal their union with a kiss, he leaned down over her and whispered in her ear: “Later.” Then he gave her lips a soft touch of his own, before taking her hand and turning his gaze out into the applauding audience. He shivered when he felt her fingernails dig into his flesh. He knew that touch; she was ravenous for him.

Oh, he would show her later how much he had missed her.

Cullen barely endured the reception and the feast in the castle after, every moment dragging on excruciatingly slow. He could barely look at Nalide beside him, fearing that his self-control might shatter at any moment if he did. Maybe it was just as well, no one who saw him that evening could have accused him of having feelings for his new bride since before, seeing how tense and uncomfortable he looked.

They just had no idea that it was because he was burning up from his desire to fuck her into oblivion.

He had set a time for himself and he waited like a wolf for its prey for the clock to strike ten that evening.

Nalide had just stood up and taken the hand of a noble who had congratulated her and asked for a dance when Cullen stood up abruptly beside her and pushed the man off her, caring nothing for the insult he was giving.

“No,” he said, jaw tight as he took Nalide’s hand in his instead. “That is enough for tonight. Nalide, we are leaving.”

She said absolutely nothing in protest and they didn’t make it further than the next corridor, let alone to their generous guest quarters, until he was on her. He kissed, sucked, nipped at her skin and she moaned in pleasure, like a good, little girl and he growled as his hands slid down her back.

“You’re _mine_,” he breathed and assaulted her mouth again before she could respond, pushing her hard into the wall, grinding against her desperate for friction but her dress was too much, hindering his movements with its overwhelming volume.

She knew it too. She pushed him off her and smiled, her hair a bit tousled and her lips red and puffy from his biting kisses. “Come meet me in our chambers in twenty minutes. I’ll see to it that I get some help getting this thing off me in the meantime.”

He nodded but he was still ravenous and he smashed his lips down on hers again, groaning as he felt her bite his lower lip hard enough to break it. She licked at the small drops of blood emerging and he looked down on her panting as he drew back, his cock straining when he saw her red tinged tongue lick her own lips smeared in his blood. She looked like something he couldn’t even have imagined in his filthiest dreams.

He pulled her to him yet again, dragging his tongue over her lips. “You know what I’m going to do to you after those twenty minutes are up, little dove? I’m going to make up for every day that has gone by that I have been forced not to touch you. I’m going to fuck you in every way you can imagine, I’ll keep you in that fucking bed for days.”

She breathed hard in his ear as he mouthed his promises to her, and her tongue darted out to lick him. “What if someone demands our presence outside the bedchamber, what if they demand _me?_ What will you do then, daddy?” Her voice was playful, she _wanted _to hear what he would do to anyone who tried to interfere.

“I would fucking kill them. You know I would. Now get your sweet, little backside up to our bedroom and get out of that fucking dress, _now_.”

He didn’t wait a second longer than those twenty minutes.

* * *

Two maids were almost done unlacing the strings on the back of her intricate dress when Nalide heard the door bang open behind her, but she couldn’t turn around since she was in the middle of the complicated undressing. One of the young women who was helping her let out a small gasp of surprise at the loud noise and she saw in her peripheral vision how they both stopped what they were doing and curtsied deeply.

“Your lord husband, my lady,” one of them murmured to Nalide with downcast eyes.

She heard footsteps approaching rapidly from behind and then two sets of shocked intakes of breaths, again from the women around her when Cullen _ripped _off the rest of the lacing holding her dress together and let it fall to the floor.

“Get out,” he snarled and Nalide could tell the maids obeyed, hurried, quiet steps disappearing behind a closing door.

For a brief second, Nalide felt panic over what gossip would spread after Cullen’s display, before she remembered that it didn’t matter.

Cullen spun her around, his eyes drinking in the naked form of her like he wanted to throw himself to his knees in front of her in worship.

His dark eyes snapped up to her face when she chirped “husband” to him. He pulled his shirt over his head before pulling her against him.

“Say it again,” he demanded.

“You are my husband, and I am your wife, Cullen. I’m anything you want me to be.” She dragged her nails down his bare torso, eliciting a hissing sound between his teeth followed by a string of curses. She stared up at him, unable to look away from his ridiculously handsome face, admiring for the thousandth time how his scar ran over his lip. She wanted to trace it with her tongue, she wanted it and his mouth against every inch of her skin, she wanted it pressed against her aching cunt so badly she could feel her own wetness trickle out of her.

She grabbed one of his obscenely large hands and plunged it down between her legs. “I mean it, Cullen. Feel how wet you make me, just from looking at you. I’ll be anything you want me to be, your bride, your little girl, your filthy little whore, _anything._”

He growled and pushed her down to her knees while her hands pulled at his trousers, getting his cock out and into her tiny hands. She stared at it hungrily, so impossibly huge and hard, just for her.

“Do you want me to taste it, daddy?” she hummed against his skin and he grunted a “fuck, yes” in response before she ran her tongue along his tip, swirling it around, feeling like the dirty little slut she knew he wanted her to be in that moment as she tasted the salty, leaking drop of liquid coming out of the head of his cock. She pressed her thighs together, smearing her own wetness between them as it ran out of her cunt and she opened her mouth wide to take more of his cock into her warm, waiting throat.

The sounds he made she thanked blessed Andraste for, feeling her nipples stiffen as he urged her on, grabbing the back of her head as he began fucking her mouth mercilessly.

“I’ve been waiting so fucking long, baby girl, so fucking long to feel you around me like this,” he hissed as she kept sucking him. “Such a good, little whore for daddy.”

She took him deeper and deeper, gagging and saliva running out the sides of her mouth, loving every fucking second of it, even though her cunt was aching to be filled up by him.

“You’re too good at this, baby, I won’t last if I let you keep doing this,” he mumbled and pulled himself out of her mouth. She wiped herself off on her arm and he dragged her up to a standing position before kissing her violently. She never stopped touching him, wrapping her small hand around his cock as wide as she could, not reaching nearly all the way around it, and he grunted into her mouth while he moved them, pushing her hard against the stone wall.

“Tell me princess, what do you want first?” he breathed as he kissed his way down her neck. She was completely dwarfed by his large body, he was covering every inch of her and more and she moaned as his fingers found her clit and _pressed. _“Do you want me to eat your little cunt until you scream? Do you want my cock inside you?”

She nodded at the last part, unable to speak as he slipped a finger inside of her.

“Fuck, you are so fucking wet for me, little dove, Maker. Where do you want me, huh? In your cunt?” He shoved another finger into her, fucking her onto his hand for a few seconds before withdrawing. “Or do you want to feel daddy’s cock in here instead?” She let out a drawn out mewl when he slipped a finger into her ass.

“Fucking anywhere, daddy, please, just fuck me somewhere, I’m going to come either way, I’ve waited so long too, I haven’t even touched myself once since you last fucked me.”

She could feel his sharp intake of breath as her words registered with him and he grabbed her and pushed her down into the large bed in the center of the room, face down into the mattress.

He didn’t say anything else, and she yelled out in pain and pleasure as she felt his cock start to penetrate her ass.

“You’re so big daddy, oh Maker, please -”

“Please, what?”

“Please, don’t stop!”

He leaned down over her, pressing into her back with his torso while he slid all of his massive cock into her asshole, and placed his lips against her ear. “I won’t stop until you’ve come more times than you can count, my sweetling,” he whispered and then groaned uncontrollably as he pushed himself almost all the way out before thrusting into her again.

She begged for more, begged for him to do it harder, not caring that she probably wouldn’t be able to walk straight for days after, but she was insatiable feeling him fucking her ass so hard and it wasn’t more than a minute or two before she was shaking around him, her orgasm hitting her hard as she screamed out her pleasure, no thought to anyone who might hear.

He was her _husband._

He only let her rest for a few moments after, not done with her, not by a long shot. He fucked himself greedily into her slopping wet cunt, his huge cock filling her up so, so good, and it wasn’t even ten minutes before she came around him again while he frantically fingered her clit while he fucked her.

“Maker’s breath, princess, you’re so fucking tight,” he groaned, singing her praises, never once slowing down his movements.

How he could last so long, have such stamina, was beyond her, but she murmured prayers of gratitude to Andraste for it. Cullen could hear her, she knew he could and she knew how much he loved hearing her pray while he fucked her, it was so forbidden, filthy, _special._

She lost track of time, lost herself in the sheer, eye-rolling bliss of him fucking her so hard that she could hear the wood of the bed frame groan under the pressure.

“Maker, princess, you feel so fucking good, I’m so close, where do you want it?” he whispered in her ear and she pleaded for him to fill her cunt with his warm come, and he did exactly what she asked of him as he exploded inside of her with a wild, roaring groan.

They lay panting, sweat-soaked limbs entangled in each other, recovering from their exertion without talking for a few minutes. He pulled her up to the crook of his neck and kissed the top of her head.

“I hope I wasn’t too hard on you, sweetheart?” he murmured against her hair and she shook her hair and smiled, looking up into his face.

“You could never,” she whispered. She was sticky, sweating, a mess. “I’m just going to get cleaned up -”

“_You_,” he said and pulled her back down into his arms when she tried to get up, “are never going anywhere, ever again. I’m not done with you yet.” He kissed her lips softly, sweetly, but with heat, the heat that was _always _there. “I will never be done with you.” He stroked her hair gently, and after a quiet, peaceful minute, his hand slipped down over her still slim stomach. “You have blessed me in every way possible, my darling wife.”

Nalide laughed quietly at hearing him call her that, laughed in sheer delight and contentment.

“You are mine forever,” he continued. “Everyone will know how much you mean to me soon enough, know that it is a death sentence to do anything to you, or our family. If someone so much as looks at you funny, I will gouge out their fucking eyes.”

A shiver went through her as she heard the dark promise of his words. A promise among others she knew he would keep.


End file.
